I Love U... Ni Dong Bu Dong?

Author's Note

2006-03-09T00:39:00.000-08:00

Author's Note

Hi everyone,

It has been a pleasure writing and sharing “I Love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong?” with all of you these three weeks.

Writing this story is a challenging task. We had to work in a team and communicate everyday through MSN almost anytime, anywhere. I remember sometimes, we have got to wake up in the middle of the night to finish up whatever we have left of the story. Tedious task (As the story grows, our pimples also grow. I wonder if our pimples will disappear when the story comes to an end? Haha!)

And, yes, it is definitely very heart-warming to know that people are reading and following the story. Never did we once think that this story will be so well received in the first place.

Thank you so much for all your comments and thank you so much for recommending it to your friends and contacts. Your comments and encouragements have propelled us to carry on writing and bring the story to an end.

As mentioned earlier, we will maintain this story blog so that everyone can read it anytime. The story may have come to an end but our support for Wei Lian and his singing career remains.

Cheers and kudos to Wei Lian and everyone out there. Thanks for being with us. I am sure we will be back soon.

Warmest regards,

The team of I love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong?

“Love is a many splendored thing. Treasure who you have in your heart now. Tell them how you feel today. We hope we have inspired you, as much as we have inspired ourselves.”

—I Love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong team

Chapter 35

2006-03-09T00:26:00.000-08:00

Wo Hai Neng Ji De Duo Shao Ge Di Yi Ci… Wo Zhi Zai Hu Wo Men Yi Qi Zou Guo De Mei Yi Bu, Dou Hui Liu Xia Shen Ke De Jiao Yin…

Chapter 35

“Eh, what you trying to do la?” Fang Qi stared smilingly at the guy sitting on the bed. She watched him fiddle with the necklace around his neck. She couldn’t help but smile. Before they left for his mum’s house, Wei Lian had dragged her out of bed early in the morning over to the accessories shop opposite his beach house.

“Hello hello! We’re here!” Wei Lian chirped cheerfully. The shop owner beamed at Fang Qi, then back to Wei Lian. “Here is your ring..” The guy took out a ring and placed it on the glass showcase. He pushed it in front of them. Wei Lian reached out to feel for the ring. But another small hand was quicker than him. His palm hit the empty glass surface.

What was his ring doing here? Fang Qi had recognized the ring immediately and picked it up before he could get to it. She felt the strangely uneven surface of the ring as she held it up to take a closer look. There were small dots in the outer side of the thick ring band. Then she broke into a wide smile, her eyes glistening. The Braille alphabets read “WL luv FQ”.

When she was in the States, she never stopped thinking about him. She wondered what he was doing every day and every night, how he was living his life. She really wanted to know more about him, the time they shared were too short. Too short. Then one day, she came across an internet website on Braille and she decided she wanted to learn his language. After two sleepless nights, she had memorized all the Braille alphabets and even learnt how to form simple sentences.

“This is mine hor.” She swiftly took down the ring necklace she wore around her neck and took out the ring with her name on it and strung his ring back into her necklace and clasped it back in place around her neck. Then, he stood still and allowed her to remove his chain and strung her ring through it, replacing it around his neck. “Nah. Yours.” She patted his chest and stood away, pleased with seeing the ring with her name around his neck, as she felt his ring that was hanging on her necklace.

“Eh, why you anyhow take mine? You know what’s on it meh?” Wei Lian asked quizzically. He had specially asked the shop owner to Braille those special initials on his ring instead of engraving it. He knew the dots were going to be too small to be felt. But he wanted Fang Qi to go and decipher it for herself. He did have the intention to let her wear his ring on her necklace. So that she would carry him close to her heart always. And the silly girl actually beat him to it…

“Haha! Why I dunno lay? Of course I know! I’m a clever girl what!” Fang Qi interrupted him, pranced happily to his side and hooked her arm into his.

“Eh! Let’s take a photo leh! Your hand phone leh?” She didn’t wait for him to reply and reached into the side pocket of his cargo pants. She retrieved his hand phone and held the hand phone camera in front of them. Gently she positioned his face next to hers, cheek to cheek and said “Smile!” Ka char! Went the hand phone camera. There it was, a picture of both of them smiling happily into camera.

Fang Qi smiled at the sight of the picture. Finally he is smiling. “You want me to make that photograph into a 2R photo for you? Complimentary from me okay?” The shop owner chirped happily at his two customers.

“Err, Mr Lim, remember that time, what I promised you?” Wei Lian asked softly. "I will bring her back and let you sketch her again when she is happy." That is a promise. He definitely will. And he had brought her back.

“Oh yes! Give me a minute.” The shop owner went into the storeroom and emerged with drawing paper and a few small pieces of charcoal. He sat a bewildered Fang Qi down on one of the stools at the counter and begun sketching. Before Fang Qi could say anything, Wei Lian, who was standing behind her, put his warm hands on her shoulder and went “Ssshhh…” And within ten minutes, the shop owner presented Fang Qi with a beautifully sketched charcoal portrait of herself. And she had the sweetest smile she had ever seen of herself.

“Ah boy ah, dinner will be ready in half an hour hor! Fang Qi can you please help him pack his messy room ah? His things all over the place and not packed since he moved to stay at the beach house. I dare not touch his things la. If not he will scold me one. Iyo! I don’t know got cockroaches anot! “ Mrs Tan shouted out from the kitchen. Wei Lian was finally moving back home today after his long stay in the beach house. Fang Qi knew that his family missed him at home and had persuaded him to go home. He knew he had stayed out long enough, so he agreed.

“Iyo, jialat la, I just came home and she is nagging already,” He said jokingly. He knew his mother’s pattern. Thinking back, he kind of missed her nagging. Haha, I must be nuts, he thought.

“Wah, your things ah, can pack a bit or not ah? How come so messy one! Your cds all over the table, your….Eeeeeeeeee! Your table and your computer! So dusty!!!!!!!” Fang Qi shrieked in mock disgust as she examined his room.

”Eh, you want to take over my mother issit? Can don’t nag or not?” Wei Lian gave her a bear hug from behind, pretending to be irritated. He bent down to give her a peck on her cheek.

Fang Qi smiled. “Eh eh eh, wah, you anyhow attack me like that one meh? She slipped out of his hug and tickled him at the waist. Wei Lian was most afraid of being tickled. He let out a loud laugh and collapsed onto the floor, pulling Fang Qi along.

“Ouch! Pain leh!” Fang Qi complained. “Haha sorry la, who asked you to tickle me?” Wei Lian put his hands on her head and brought her face close to his. He loved the feel of the soft hair and the smell of her face.

“Sorry only ah? I don’t care. I want you to say that.” Fang Qi acted annoyed. All of a sudden she remembered what Mrs Tan said to her last time. “Girl ah, you must forgive him hor, that boy is not good at expressing his feelings one hor. Which day he go and say I love you to you ah, you must tell me hor!"

“Huh? Say what? Say what?” Wei Lian acted blur. She always liked to force him to say this. He had not said it ever since Christmas Eve. No matter how much she forced him, tickled him, he just couldn’t bring himself to say it. To him, these three words are special and can’t be used too often. Otherwise it would become meaningless.

“I love you, ni dong bu dong?” She suddenly whispered into his ears. “Hmm.” Was his curt response.

“I love you, ni dong bu dong?” She refused to give up, saying once more. “Wo dong la.” Again came his short and sweet answer.

“I love you, ni dong bu dong? I love you, ni dong bu dong?”

“I know ah. You love me mah.” He refused to give her the answer she wanted to hear so much.

“No!!! You say! Say, I love you, ni dong bu dong? I love you, ni dong bu dong? I love you, ni dong bu dong……..I love you, ni dong bu dong…….I love you….ni dong bu dong…….” Fang Qi repeated her words in exasperation.

“Eh dear, say lay. You only said it that day to make me feel touched only issit? Oh, so you don’t mean it one la?” Fang Qi gave him a kick in the leg. Then she fell quiet and moved away from him to sit in one corner. Wei Lian thought he heard her sniffing.

“Huh, eh, you don’t cry lay. I…I….iya you know I don’t know how to say such things one mah.” No response. “Eh…don’t like that lay…” Wei Lian got worried and crawled over towards Fang Qi, feeling for where she was sitting. As he reached her, he pulled her into a hug, cradling her like a baby. He felt for her face and tucked her hair behind her left ear. “I love you,” he whispered quickly into her ear.

“Hah? What you say?” Fang Qi teased. “I love you, ni dong bu dong?,” Wei Lian knew she was torturing him as usual but the feeling felt right at the moment. He quickly slipped the ring he wore on his neck onto her third finger. He had taken down the ring. He wanted her to wear it on her finger. Looking at his action, Fang Qi glowed with joy, hugged him back tightly and gave him a peck on the lips.

Who dare says he is unromantic? He does have his own way of giving romantic surprises. “Aren’t you supposed to say something lay?” He asked smilingly. Silently, she removed his ring from her necklace and slipped the ring onto his finger. “Wo dong la.” She whispered, smiling widely at him.

Just as Wei Lian moved in for a kiss, Fang Qi’s hand phone suddenly rang. Wei Lian was baffled as she broke away from his hug to answer the call. “Eh, why are using the song I wrote for Cherie as your ring tone? Where you get it from one? Who is that la?” Who is that disturbing them?

“Ah Ma la. Hmm..I found it by chance lor.” She answered as she hangs up the call. Ah Ma had called to say she is coming back to Singapore for another short stay. She has been feeling real excited about her and Wei Lian getting together as a real couple finally.

“You don’t use that song as your ring tone la. Change la.” Why use that song when she got a song of her own?

“You mean this one ah?” She played the song he penned for her on her hand phone’s MP3 player. “Ya la….” He smiled softly, playing with her smooth hair as he slumped against the edge of his bed. “I love you, ni dong bu dong?” He tried to hold her face close to his once again. “Wo dong la…” She replied him for the second time. He felt her warm breathing on his face. He knew she was close. He bent down, wanting to kiss her.

Suddenly, Fang Qi jumped up and ran out of his room, shouting at the top of her voice, “Auntie!!! Your son just said I love you!!!”. “Girl ah, you must forgive him hor, that boy is not good at expressing his feelings one hor. Which day he go and say I love you to you ah, you must tell me hor!"

Wei Lian slapped his forehead in exasperation. But the smile on his face gave him away. This was his special someone. This was his barbaric girl. This was his Fang Qi. His finger slightly traced the 2R photograph that had slipped out of her jeans’ pocket. His lips broke into a huge and contented smile. Fang Qi. This is his Fang Qi.

Two hours later. A loud voice shrieked out from Wei Lian’s room. Fang Qi was hiding in a corner crying bitterly when Wei Lian’s parents dashed in. “Iyo Ah boy, you bully your girlfriend ah? You block of wood la! Wait you chase her away again how?!” Knowing that he had chased her away the previous time with his hurtful words, Mrs Tan chided and warned him.

Wei Lian had wanted Fang Qi to move in to stay with him but she refused. After seeing his disappointed face, she finally relented. But she made him agree to her condition. “Sometimes, I want to go back to my own house or the beach house and stay. Can or not?”

“I where dare not to let you go home? But I want to go with you lor.” He agreed but insisted that he should be allowed to follow. Half a year. They have already wasted half a year apart. He was seriously scared of not having her by his side.

They came to a compromise and just as Fang Qi was going to give him a hug,
“Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge” came on the radio and Wei Lian automatically started singing along. Fang Qi stopped in her tracks as if something hit her. This voice. “You bluff me!!!” She shrieked as she remembered hearing his singing voice. A scene in the streets of her crying and begging a blind guy to sing her…… He knew it all along! She assumed as she slowly recalled the familiar voice singing the song. Cannot, must teach him a lesson for bluffing me.

“Huh! I bluff you what?” Then he realized what he was singing and knew the reason. She hadn’t realized that he was the guy who sang her this song in the streets four years ago. Up till now. The silly girl la.

“Auntie! Your son bluff me.” Fang Qi complained while burying her crying face in between her knees. Mrs Tan knew she was throwing a tantrum to get back at Wei Lian. As usual her son must have done something to upset her. “Err, you both settle yourself ah?” she chuckled and walked out of his room, pulling a baffled Mr Tan along.

Fang Qi stomped her feet on the floor and pretended to weep louder. “Good luck to the next guy that comes along lor. He sure will be in for a hard time man.” Jake’s words rang in Wei Lian’s mind. A resigned smile broke out on his face as he moved towards where Fang Qi was sitting.

Too bad, this is the girl he loves and nothing can change the fact. The moments they shared together previously were too few, too short. He doesn’t wish to go through the torment of missing her again. He doesn't want to be left only with the memories he had of her. He doesn’t want to waste any more time quarrelling and making her angry again. He just wants her by his side forever, to create more wonderful memories together.

Feeling the top of her head, he bent down and quickly embraced her before she could resist. Her protests sounded muffled against his chest.

As Fang Qi melted into his hug, he reached for her hand, held it tight and said, “Iya, now you are my girlfriend, nothing else matters ok? I never bluff you la. I love you, ni dong bu dong…”

Chapter 34

2006-03-09T00:22:00.000-08:00

Bie Zai Rang Ai Bai Gei Shi Jian, Bie Zai Rang Ai Shu Gei Yong Yuan, Wo Men Dao Di He Shi Neng Hui Dao Yuan Dian? Wo Shen Me Dou Bu Xiang, Wo Zhi Shi Xiang Yao Ni Na Rang Wo Xing Fu Yi Bei Zi De Ai…

Chapter 34

“…ni dong bu dong?” The train screeched to a halt, drowning his heartfelt words. Wei Lian panicked. Did she hear it? Did she? Or has she gone and boarded the train? His heart pounded furiously. He was at a loss for words yet again. A feeling of helplessness washed over him. He clutched tightly to the bear, as if trying to muster his courage again.

Suddenly, familiar footsteps entered his ears. It sounds like friction of footsteps against the train flooring. Huh? She really entered the train?! She didn’t see him? He was very sure he heard her footsteps. He recognized her walking patterns. Wei Lian decided he had better not take any chances. Clutching the bear in one hand and putting the other hand outstretched to feel the empty space ahead with slight uncertainty, he pushes his way into the almost full train cabin.

“Fang Qi. I love you. I love you, ni dong bu dong?” He said it aloud, ignoring gasps of surprises that rang around his ears. He couldn’t care less. He doesn’t want to ask them if she was in the train cabin. What if she heard him asking and she went to other cabins or out of the train?

Fang Qi was standing on the empty platform, staring at the train tracks. She was stepping into the train cabin when Wei Lian’s voice entered her ears, amidst the noise. He had said something. With slight hesitation, she turned back and stared in disbelief at Wei Lian who was pushing through the crowd. She wasn’t sure if she heard what he said correctly. Then, she saw him being squeezed and got pushed out. She panicked as she watched him struggling with unstable steps.

She grabbed his arm in time and pulled him out of the train just as the train door closed. Both of them staggered backwards but Fang Qi gripped onto Wei Lian’s arm tightly, afraid that he will fall. Slowly they steadied themselves. She could feel his heavy breathing. She dare not think what would happen if she breathe. Then she held her breath and pulls apart their distance. Till she was sure she couldn’t hear his breathing by her ears. Silence fell for a moment. Suddenly the train platform was bustling with activities again as the passengers alighted from the opposite train that just arrived. People were walking hurriedly past, babies were crying, kids were screaming. She wasn’t sure if she had heard correctly.

“I love you.” She heard it again. Loud and clear. Looking at the little bear in his outstretched hand, and the ring on the necklace around the bear’s neck, Fang Qi wept. But the decisiveness in his words rang in her mind again.

"Wah, you finally back from your hot date ah?"

"Eh, why? So hot until you cannot talk issit?" she taunted him.

"What la?" He had answered unwillingly.

"What, what? Your hot date with your Cherie mah! People ask you out you agree immediately, I ask you to help me with something small, I have to beg you until I go on my knees!!" Fang Qi shrieked at the top of her voice, unable to control herself.

"Who are you la? You think you are really my girlfriend meh?!!"

“Eh ask you. If one day you like me how ah?” She had asked him during one of their earlier conversations, way before Ah Ma came.

“Ah? Like you? You not the kind of style I like la. You go change lor. Change liao maybe I see how lor.”

“Eh! I am serious la!” She screamed at him.

“I am also serious la. Don’t keep asking such questions lay.”

“So you mean you will never like me lor? A tiny weeny bit also won’t ah?” She pressed for an answer.

Wei Lian shook his head and replied her decisively. “Won’t la.”

Hearing no response, Wei Lian didn’t give up and asked loudly “I love you, ni dong bu dong?” Fang Qi’s couldn’t control herself upon hearing that. Her tears just kept flowing quietly. He loves me. He really loves me. He just said it….

“Eh. I say it liao, how come no response one?” He was still holding out the bear towards her.

Hmph! Why must he spoil the romantic mood ah? Cannot, I must not give in so easily. Fang Qi thought playfully to herself. She walked towards him, quickly wiping the tears off her face.

“Hah? You sure anot? You love me, then Cherie how? Hah? Your precious Cherie how?” Fang Qi just blurted out. She didn’t mean to say it. Looking at his face, which finally showed some expression - a pleading look - she wanted so much to just go over and hug him. But she didn’t want to let him off so easily. Suddenly, she spotted Cherie smiling widely at her. She knew she had the license to go ahead.

“You forgot what you say before?” She just didn’t want him to have an easy time.

“What did I say before?” Wei Lian heard her question and went stunned for a second. Then he recalled…

“Eh ask you. If one day you like me how ah?” She had asked him during one of their earlier conversations, way before Ah Ma came.

“Ah? Like you? You not the kind of style I like la. You go change lor. Change liao maybe I see how lor.” She nothing better to do, choose this kind of topic to talk is it? He loves Cherie.
“Eh! I am serious la!” She screamed at him.

“I am also serious la. Don’t keep asking such questions lay.” He had answered. Bo liao la this woman.

“So you mean you will never like me lor? A tiny weeny bit also won’t ah?” She pressed for an answer.

Wei Lian shook his head and replied her decisively. “Won’t la.” Who dared to like her ah?

Wei Lian really wanted to kick himself. He replied sheepishly. “Err, my feelings for Cherie is already past la. Now I… ,” Fang Qi didn’t give him a chance to talk.

“Now you what? How? You tell me how lo. How I know when you will go crazy and scold me and tell me to get lost again just because you’re upset that I came between you and Cherie? And why must I tell you l love you first before you can tell me ah?” Fang Qi chided him, trying to mask her mischievous tone. Then she turned and pretended to walk away. She stopped and turned back to face him after a short distance.

Cherie wanted to burst out laughing but controlled herself. She could see that Wei Lian was very lost for words. These two are really made for each other.

“Why must you always bully me ah? From the day I knew you until now, you are always mean to me!! Why why why?? ” Suddenly, Fang Qi started getting emotional again as she thought of all the things they had gone through, all the time they had wasted.

Moving his legs slowly and step by step, Wei Lian started to walk forward towards Fang Qi. He could hear where she was standing exactly. She was only about six steps away from him. As he moved slowly towards her, he nearly lost his footing. Fang Qi’s heart lurched. Just one more step and he will fall off the platform, onto the train tracks! She quickly grabbed hold of him by the arm. He stopped and balanced himself when his outstretched hand brushed against her arm. He felt for her hand rapidly and pushed the bear into it. Fang Qi stared closely at the bear and the ring necklace that hung around its neck.

“I am not a romantic person. I don’t know how to express my concerns and feelings. I am not like the other guys who will keep the “love” word by their mouths constantly. I know I put up a barrier around myself, so it is hard for people to get in and to know the real me…..I, err….. this contains my feelings for you.” He began saying in his gentlest voice. I ya what is he saying la. “I ya, you know I don’t know how to talk one la, but this bear reminded me of you when you were gone. This ring, you bought it earlier on but didn’t collect so I kept it for you lor. And I also wrote a song for you. Eh, you can don’t be so fussy or not?”

Despite the way he spoke, there was not a hint of impatience or sarcasm in his voice. All Fang Qi heard was a shy and loving tone. He was speaking in a loving tone. She was ready to melt. As she felt him standing so close to her, his hands on her arms, her tears started trickling down her cheeks again. It was tears of joy. She knew he really meant it this time. She knew it took a lot of his courage and pride to say it out.

Then, she lifted the bear and took a look at the ring. It was the ring she had ordered from the accessories shop near the beach house. She had forgotten to collect it as she had left Singapore in a huff. Suddenly she thought she saw some words on the inner side of the ring. She squint her eyes and brought the ring up for a closer look. When she saw the words “Fang Qi” engraved there, her tears flowed freely. Her heart felt a happiness that she has never felt before. It was warm, sweet and many indescribable feelings all rolled into one.

“You got them to engrave my name ah?” She asked softly, speaking to him in a gentler tone for once.

“Yah, I…” he answered in his deep voice. Before he could continue, Fang Qi flung her arms around him and hugged him. This time he was not taken aback. It seemed so natural. He instinctively wrapped his arms round her and hugged her tightly, as if he was never going to let go. Fang Qi melted in the warmth of his hug and buried her tear-stained face into the crook of his neck. Amidst the occasionally busy train platform, they felt like they were in a world of their own. Their new found world.

After what seemed like eternity, Fang Qi looked up and thought aloud, “Eh, how come got another ring?” She gave the ring that hung on the chain he wore around his neck a tug. It looks…familiar…

Wei Lian felt her fingers on his neck. He pulled her away in an awkward manner. “I ya, the two rings are actually magnetic one la, can stick together la. You don’t know the rings are a pair one meh?” He asked casually. He had stopped by the accessories shop for a short chit chat some time back and the owner showed him the other part of the magnetic rings. “Don’t know lay. The shop owner didn’t tell me what.” She replied, fiddling with the bigger sized ring he was wearing on his neck. “Eh, how come your ring didn’t engrave your name one?” She was displeased to find no name on the inner surface of the ring. Wei Lian heard her displeasure and laughed softly. “Waiting for you to come back and engrave for me lor. Can or not?”

“You said you wrote a song for me? What song? Was it the one you sang just now at the café?” She ignored his question and went on to ask him about the song he mentioned, feeling all exhilarated inside her. He wrote her a song!

“Huh? You were there meh? So nice or not?” Wei Lian was surprised that Fang Qi was actually at the café just now.

“I ya, I didn’t listen to the whole song la, how I know nice or not?” She wasn’t going to explain why she had left halfway. She felt so silly jumping to conclusions. Anyway it wasn’t important now. They already know how they both felt about each other. “Why didn’t you finish listening lay?” Since she was at the café, why didn’t she finish listening?

“I ya, stop asking la! Never listen finish never listen finish lor. Cannot ah? I don’t care! I want to hear you sing it to me.” She said coyly, and stamped her feet in a child-like manner. “I want to hear it now!” She demanded teasingly.

“Come with me.” Wei Lian grabbed her hand, gave her a tug and started walking towards the exit of the train station. He had been here umpteen times he could memorise the layout of the train station. For once, he was leading Fang Qi out and not the other way around. He felt a strong wave of newfound confidence wash over him and gained a new spring to his steps. He found himself smiling from ear to ear. He was in love.

As they walked out of the train station, Cherie stood there with her arms folded and a wide grin on her face. They had forgotten that she was still there. The lovebirds, she thought with a chuckle, and followed quietly after them.

Wei Lian led Fang Qi to the table where Jason, Jake, Jace and her boyfriend were sitting. Jason let out a cheeky whistle when he saw them approaching, hand in hand. “Woo hoo! Look who’s here!” Wei Lian and Fang Qi both blushed and he gave her hand a tight squeeze. She squeezed his hand back. They felt a little embarrassed with the teasing, but neither of them was going to let go. Not now. Not ever.

“Eh, you sit down first lor? I’ll go get my guitar.” Wei Lian said in an awkward yet gentle manner to Fang Qi. There are too many people around. He only wanted to show his gentle side to her.

“Don’t worry la, we will take care of your darling la.” Cherie laughed as she walked towards the table. She had come in after them.

“Oi oi oi!” Wei Lian chided her mischievously, while Fang Qi gave Cherie a playful poke at her waist. Laughter broke out at the table, adding to the festive mood all around in the café. Suddenly she thought of something. She turned towards Cherie who’s snuggling up in Jason’s arms. Oh…she was still thinking how come Cherie actually volunteered to give Wei Lian up. So she was testing her. “Eh why?” Cherie looked up at her in surprise. “If I don’t test you, you might still misunderstand that we are a couple leh!” She laughed. Fang Qi crackled softly and gestured a nod of thanks.

Wei Lian settled himself down on the high stool on the stage, strapped his guitar around him and tapped on the microphone to test for sound. “Good evening everyone. Tonight is a very special night. Not only is it Christmas eve, it is a very special night to me.” Knowing cheers came from the table below the stage. Wei Lian let out an embarrassed laugh.

“To start off tonight’s performance, I would like to bring you this song which I had specially written for a special someone.” He turned his head towards the table where his friends were seated. “My special someone. Her name is Fang Qi.” Everyone in the café clapped and cheered him on. Fang Qi blushed furiously in her seat, her heart overflowing with happiness. She has never expected him to so openly express his feelings for her. Silly boy la, she thought.

“And the title of the song is “Wo Zhi Shi Xiang Yao”,” Strumming the guitar introduction, Wei Lian launched into the song.

“Zhao xun yi ge mei you ji mo de di fang
Yi ge ni he wo de tian tang
Jiu suan shi mian qiang
Ceng jing zou guo de mei yi ge huang tang
Jin wo zhe ni de shou zai duo kun nan
Wo men dou jian qiang

Zhao xun yi ge mei you fang xiang de di fang
Zhi you ni he wo neng fei xiang
Ai qing de qian fang
You xie mo hu ye you yi xie pang huang
Jin wo zhe ni de shou dai ni liu lang
Yi qi yao wang

Wo zhi shi xiang yao yi xie feng kuang
He yong bao ni de xi wang
Huo xu yu hui zhan zhuan wan ban jian nan
Zhi yong xin de jiang ni qian ban

Wo zhen de xiang yao yi xie feng kuang
He qin wen ni de li liang
Yong bao ni ku qi pei ni shang xin
Jue bu hui rang ni shou wei qu

Wo yong xiang nian de ju li hua zuo yi ke xin
Wo pin ming shan yao wei ni zhao liang
Hei an zhong de yin ying

Wo yong zui hou de sheng ming chi xu zhe hu xi
Zhi wei le deng dai yong bao ni….”

Fang Qi felt tears in her eyes again. Idiot Wei Lian! The words that he mentioned to her earlier ran through her thoughts.

“I am not a romantic person. I don’t know how to express my concerns and feelings….”

He not romantic? No what....She smiled as her gaze fell upon the guy she deeply loved. He has his way of being romantic without needing to try too hard like what some guys nowadays do. She doesn’t need him to buy her gifts and bring her roses everyday. All she wants from him is….it doesn’t matter what. As long as he loves her with his heart, everything else doesn’t matter anymore.

Her song. Wei Lian penned a song for her. Looking at him on stage, smiling in her direction, she was overcome with a sense of pride and emotions.

Chapter 33

2006-03-09T00:19:00.000-08:00

Wo Shen Bian De Mei Jian Shi Qing Dou Bian De Bu Yi Yang Le, Zhi Yin Wei Wo De Xin Li You Le Ni… Wo Ke Yi Xiang Quan Shi Jie Shuo Wo Ai Ni, Na Ni Ne…?

Chapter 33

Wei Lian had made an excuse to get away from the gang’s love conversation. To prevent himself from thinking of Fang Qi again, he had to abandon the rest of the people to come out for a breather, he told himself. Cherie was returning from the restroom when she bumped into Wei Lian at the entrance. He didn’t want to start another conversation. Instead, he got Cherie to walk over with him to the only ice cream store at Daysprings Mall. Suddenly tonight, he had a strong craving for ice cream. Rum and raisin ice cream. He hadn’t eaten any ice cream for a long while. Ever since she left. There are too many thoughts going through his mind. And what was he hearing at the ice cream store?

Wei Lian cocked his head as he listened to the voice placing her order at the same time. His grip on the ice cream counter tightened. Was it really Fang Qi?

“Fang Qi!!!” Cherie shrieked happily. She was relieved that she finally saw Fang Qi. If she had misunderstood that Wei Lian still had feelings for her, she was prepared to explain everything to her. Looking at Wei Lian’s expressionless face, Cherie was tempted to kick him. Can he at least show a bit more emotions? Hasn’t he been waiting for Fang Qi to come back? Now that she is back, what is he waiting for? Unable to stand it anymore, she grabbed his hand and dragged him to the other side of the ice cream store.

“Wah, you two still eating the same flavour ah?” Cherie started to tease them, in hope of helping them. She knew too well that Wei Lian would be too stunned to do anything. Fang Qi gave an awkward smile, but her heart ached as she saw Cherie holding on to Wei Lian’s hand. Cherie had forgotten that she was holding his hand. It was such a natural thing for her to do since they were such good friends. But she didn’t realize it deepened Fang Qi’s misunderstanding. So they are actually together. She smirked to herself. She can finally give up. Fang Qi thought inside her bitterly. She could almost feel her tears gushing out, but she fought hard to hold it back.

Avalanches of thoughts were running through Wei Lian’s mind. He has been thinking of her day and night, hoping that she will return one day. He wanted to tell her how much he had missed her and he was sorry for hurting her. But as usual, no words came out of his mouth. He felt a whirl of mixture of confusion and exhilaration churning in his mind. Too sudden, he thought. Now that she is back, he doesn’t know what to say to her. How come I can’t think of anything to say? He chided himself. Suddenly….

“Eh. You came back liao ah? Ok lor, I eat other flavor lor.” He blurted out jokingly, half laughing. He cringed at himself. What the hell was he saying? Tan Wei Lian, why can’t you find nicer things to say? Why does everything you say come out wrong?

Cherie reached out to give him a playful slap on his cheek like she always does when he talks nonsense. Fang Qi couldn’t bear witnessing the little acts of intimacy between Cherie and Wei Lian. She had wanted to come back to Singapore to confess her feelings but seeing Cherie had made her take a backseat. And now seeing Cherie and Wei Lian together, she felt all the more defeated. She wasn’t prepared to meet him at all. Especially not in such a way. Her mind was in a horrible mess, she wasn’t thinking straight. She just wanted to scream.

“Iya stop la!” Fang Qi heard herself shriek. She looked at Cherie with hurt and anger in her eyes and continued “Last time you don’t like him you still behave so intimately with him. Now I don’t know if you are together… iya I don’t care la! But can you stop behaving so intimately a not? Can you both spare me?? Please???” She didn’t know what she was saying and she couldn’t stop herself. Hurt and jealousy had clouded her thoughts. Her eyes brimmed with tears but she forced them back.

Cherie was taken aback at Fang Qi’s outburst and raised her eyebrows. But she was laughing in her heart. She is finally showing her true feelings. Cherie jumped at the chance. She pretended to be offended and hissed, “Ya what, I didn’t like him last time mah. But I realized later that I love him mah!” Cherie purposely chose a strong word to test her out—Love. She knew Fang Qi would not be able to take such a word, especially in such a situation. Seeing Fang Qi stunned at her own outburst and suddenly quiet, she decided to go all the way out.

“What’s wrong with us being together? Hmm..Fang Qi, I heard Wei Lian say he was actually helping you out to act as your boyfriend when your grandma returned? Is there by any chance you…you actually also like him……” Cherie’s voice went softer and softer and finally trailed off. She hung low her head and pretended to look at the floor as if she would not be able to take it if Fang Qi really says she love Wei Lian.

Fang Qi looked up bitterly at Cherie’s frail figure, her hands locked tightly together with Wei Lian’s. Cherie continued. “Since you already left, and we both eventually found out that we still like each other, so….we got together…hmm..you like him right?” What more can she say? Cherie has already put it frankly to her that they love each other. She is tired. So tired. Suddenly everything didn’t matter anymore. Can she just keep quiet and walk away? As she hears Cherie asking Wei Lian whom he actually loves, her heart fell into a dark bottomless pit. She felt as if all her feelings and emotions have been withdrawn from her life. Then, she turned and started to walk away, trying hard to quicken her heavy footsteps.

“Fang Qi! You haven’t told me if you also love him. If you do, I will leave.” Cherie was shocked that she actually walked away. She was afraid that she might have carried the joke too far. She quickly called out to Fang Qi who was already dragging herself away from her original spot.

All this while, Wei Lian stood there feeling bewildered. His heart beat like it was going to burst any moment. He had never expected to meet Fang Qi today, but he had been having a strange unexplainable feeling the whole day. Especially when he was singing her song. He felt as if the song gave him hope of seeing her today. And now, standing here in the crowded shopping centre, hearing his barbaric Fang Qi shouting at the top of her voice, he didn’t feel embarrassed at all. Instead he felt happy. A form of happiness that had been elusive for months.

As he heard Cherie issue Fang Qi her challenge, he quickly held back his overflowing emotions and anxiety with his usual way of nonchalance. He decided to play along. “Cherie keep telling me she got a feeling you love me, I just want to know if it’s true?” He finally spoke up again. “If you say you love me, I will say I love you!” This girl made him wait for six months, made him fall into the depths of loneliness and confusion. Tease her a bit first la, I’ll be nice to her later. He told himself.

Fang Qi couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She stopped in her tracks. She has had enough. She came back all the way to Singapore not to hear him challenge her to such stupid things. She couldn’t stand it anymore. “If you say you love me, I will say I love you!” His words rang loudly and deeply in her ears. Fine!

“YA. TAN WEI LIAN, I LOVE YOU!” She proclaimed loudly, her tears gushing out more ferociously than before. “I love you…I say I–love—you. Do you know…ni dong bu dong….” She didn’t care if the people around heard and stared. She didn’t care if he would laugh at her. She didn’t care about her pride anymore. She just needed to let him know how she really felt. She only needs him to know….

Wei Lian was stunned. This is the first time he heard her say that and she had said it so directly and firmly. Many times he had imagined her telling him she loves him. He always wondered how she would say it to him. And now that she had said it….

His hands clutched the side pockets of his cargo pants tightly, his head spinning, searching for something to say. He didn’t know how to react, except to look straight. He knew that he was to reply her with “I love you” but he couldn’t snap out from his state of shock. He really didn’t expect her to say it. He thought he knew her very well, that she was too proud to say such a thing to him, let alone in public….but apparently he was wrong.

“There are things you'd love to hear that you would never hear from the person whom you would like to hear them from, but don't be so deaf as not to hear it from the one who says it from his heart.”

Those were Ah Ma’s words of advice to her when she left the hospital. Her mind was in a state of anxiety. Will he say it out or not? Will he ask her to stay?

Seeing Wei Lian hesitate for a long while, Fang Qi’s heart tore into shreds with hurt and anger. “How dare he cheat me out of these words and then pretend not to respond? “ she thought in disappointment.

He still refuses to say it. It’s me who think too much! It’s all one-sided! “Fine!!! If you dare not say it, you get out of my sight!” She scolded, turning to walk away towards the MRT station. Her tears flowed rebelliously down her cheeks. She had to go. She was not going to let Cherie see her cry. She was not going to cry in front of that idiot Tan Wei Lian. Her heart ached painfully as she wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. She has been the one giving all the while, if only he could just give in to her. Just this once…just this once will do…

Wei Lian heard her footsteps drifting further and further. “Eh where is she walking?!” He asked Cherie worriedly. “Eh, MRT station, MRT station!! She is walking very fast. Quick!” Cherie replied frantically and automatically led him to the train station. They quickened their pace, pushing through the crowd into the station, up the escalator and onto the train platform. Cherie scanned the platforms for Fang Qi. And then…she saw her, standing alone at the far end of the almost empty platform. The train has just left. The rest of the passengers had almost dispersed as they traveled down the escalator. Cherie led him near Fang Qi.

Wei Lian nodded as she lifted his arm up to show him where Fang Qi was. Suddenly, he reached into his bag and took out something. It was the charity bear that he had bought from her. On the little bear’s neck, was a necklace bearing the ring. Fang Qi’s ring. The one that he had engraved her name on. He had strung the necklace round the bear to make it complete. He has been bringing the bear along with him wherever he goes. When he reached home, he would take it out and place it beside his pillow. Sometimes he couldn’t believe he was doing that, but feeling the bear and knowing its presence gave him a sense of comfort.

Holding the bear close to him gave him courage. The courage to finally tell Fang Qi how he feels for her. Slowly inching towards where Fang Qi was standing, he took a deep breathe. A million thoughts ran through his head. His heart was in his mouth. He never felt so determined before, especially in affairs of the heart. He knew he had to let her know. Now. As the train on the opposite platform pulled in, chugging noisily, he stretched out his hand holding the bear, and said it. “I love you….”

Chapter 32

2006-03-08T01:09:00.000-08:00

You Ren Shuo, Shi Jian Ke Yi Rang Ren Wang Ji Yi Xie Shi Qing, Sheng Zhi Shi Yi Xie Wo Men Bu Xiang Wang Ji De Shi Qing… Zhi Shi Wei He Shi Jian Hai Shi Wu Fa Mo Qu Wo Dui Ni De Yi Qie Si Xu…?

Chapter 32

Fang Qi had been wandering around aimlessly after leaving the café. No matter how hard she tried to push thoughts of Wei Lian out of her mind, she failed miserably. And worst of all, she had subconsciously wandered into Daysprings Shopping Mall. She still remembered the day Jason and her met Wei Lian and Cherie there.

"Rum and raisin!"

"Wah, you also like rum and raisin ah? Wei Lian also loves it leh!" Cherie chirped, hooking her arm into his.

"Don't know what's so nice about rum and raisin. I think only the two of you know how to appreciate lor." Jason said, shaking his head.

She remembered his expressionless look when he heard Jason fussing over her. She remembered how close Cherie was to him. She remembered how he had reached out to hold her instead of Cherie when the group of rowdy boys came charging into them. She had felt a silly sense of hope. Maybe he did have feelings for her. But now, she realized, all the while, she has been thinking too much. She knew what she felt is one-sided but she allowed herself to fall deeper. She smiled bitterly to herself through her tears. She has been so silly.

Tears welled in her eyes as she recalled Wei Lian’s moving vocals at the café just now. The lyrics of the song had touched her. In fact, she has never heard him sing in front of her before. But this is not the first time she was really listening to him sing. She stared at the song playing in her hand phone. At the beach house, he always hid from her when he was singing.

Iya, you don’t come and disturb me la!” He had warned her.

“Why? I want to hear cannot meh?” She had insisted on pushing the “Play” button on his portable CD player.

“Eh! You don’t touch my CD player!” He shrieked with displeasure.

“Ya what, what?! You wrote songs but don’t dare to let people hear ah?” She pressed down the “Play” button on his CD player. And immediately, he swept the CD player off the top of the cupboard with tremendous anger and walked out of the house. The CD player flap loosened, and there, lying on the floor, was a scratched piece of unlabeled CD.

It was moments later that she bent down to pick the CD up from the floor. She slotted it back into the damaged player and press “Play”. The track skipped on and off as the CD was scratched and the CD player damaged. But nevertheless, she still managed to hear a beautifully written song. For Cherie. She heard him saying at the end of the song. Then, she kept away the broken player and….the CD.

She sat down on the stairs in one corner of the concourse area. She held her handphone in her hands sadly. Cherie’s song was on “play in the background” function. Yes. She had converted the music clip into an MP3 audio file on her handphone. She held the handphone close to her heart. She doesn’t know the title of the song. But she clearly heard his feelings for Cherie. She has never heard this song on the radio. She wondered if it was specially penned for Cherie. Then she heard herself chiding inside her silently. Obviously it’s a song he wrote it for Cherie. If not, why would he be so angry and swept the CD player off the cupboard with such strength? He didn’t even care that it almost hit her legs.

Can he also sing her a song? Pain overwhelmed her. She could only hear his voice through Cherie’s song. The scene at the café just now ran vividly in her mind. The songs he wrote are always for Cherie. Is that going to be the only way to hear his voice from now on? She thought sadly.

"Wah, mister, why are you looking more miserable than the other guy who loves the girl? Actually it is you who love the girl a lot right?" she remembered the first time her gaze fell upon Wei Lian. She remembered the look of tremendous pain in his eyes from a brief glance. She remembered him standing up awkwardly and wanted to get out of the café hurriedly and she had overturned his glass of drink and Jason demanding an apology from her.

"Wei Lian, eh, you okay?" Jason passed him some tissues. "I ya, okay la, nothing much la." She remembered Wei Lian saying as he wiped away the drops of cold milk tea on his hand

"Eat lay, waiting for what? Waiting for dinnertime ah? Now only three plus in the afternoon la, you later then eat ah? Don’t tell me I must feed you lor." She remembered that cold morning she had sneaked out of her own house and barged into Wei Lian’s house.

"I ya I tell you already what. I wont disturb you one what. I just don’t want to go home cannot is it?" She remembered the irritated look on his face.

"You don’t happen to be running away from loan sharks do you?" She remembered him asking straightforwardly.

"Eh, can you don't be so rough a not? You behave like a boy you know." He has dissed her directly.

"Eh, you don't keep on eh, eh, eh me can a not? You don't know my name meh?" He doesn’t know her name meh? Tong didn’t tell him? Cannot be la.

"Huh? Why should I know what is your name lay? You also eh, eh, eh me what." What a brute.

"I also eh, eh, eh you because I don't remember what." Wei Lian threw her words back at her.

"Eh, this girl is the one you love is it?" She remembered asking, purposely wanting to disturb him. Who ask him to always put on an expressionless face?

"Cherie is the girl you like ah?" She hates it when she asks so many questions and there is no response. It's like talking to the wall. She remembered the look of pain that flashed across his face.

"If I can’t make you change, my name is not Tan Wei Lian!" he proclaimed loudly when they were at his house.

"Hi dearie!" She remembered his awkward reaction when she hugged him at his waist and his shocked, blushing red-hot face when she planted a kiss on his lips for the first time. She laughed. Huh??!! Oei! His face had blushed furiously and he quickly brushed away the hands that hugged around his waist and chided her.

"I yo! Can you don't anyhow hug a not?"

"Why cannot lay? Got your favorite baked potato and roasted chicken wings leh….” She remembered retorting back in a sweet tone.

She also remembered de-boning his favorite chicken wings to chicken shreds; mashed his baked potato into a gooey mush and stirred in a lot of chili sauce to prevent him from enjoying his food. What the hell is this??! His tongue felt hot chili sauce and mush. She remembered his facial expression change as he indifferently swallowed the glob of gooey mess.

"Eh, enough la, enough la! Jake’s not here what, you want to kiss for who to see?!" She remembered the way he chided her when she teased him.

"I ya I big sacrifice leh. Now we kissed, I am yours leh." She remembered joking and poking him.

"Issit? I'm not so easy one lor. Want to win my heart, the girl has to put in a lot of effort one." He sniggered and turned away from her.

"I ya I’m so cute, you cannot resist me la."

"Wah, you say yourself cute one ah. I never say. You cute meh? You bluff me I also won't know. You can also say you are very beautiful what."

"Oei!! You don't purposely personal attack can or not?"

"I where dare to la? You want to quarrel, I grant your wish only mah."
"You are not gentle at all. Talk like a brute."

"Ya thank you. I never said I am a gentleman. I can be a gentleman, but got to see whether I want or not first lor."

"Eh! You can don't anyhow touch me anot?" Wei Lian brushes off the hands with irritation. Her fingernail accidentally scratched his chest as he tried on a shirt.

"Iya, this size can la, why must you keep measuring?" Wei Lian's irritated voice sounded again. Hearing no reply from her, Wei Lian asked again impatiently.

"Eh! This size can la. Big a bit okay la! Oei, I talking to you." He tried to listen for a response before he realized that he was talking to the air.

"Wait la! This material wash liao also don't know will shrink or not. Buy this size if shrink then you wear liao look like dumpling la. If buy bigger then never shrink, you will look like wearing pyjamas you know??"

"Iyo, you very troublesome, buy one shirt also must think so much. The most I don't wash la, then won't shrink lor." He had gotten a big stinging slap on his arm for rebutting her with that. What kind of crap reason is that?

“You are a coffee addict la! You crazy ah? Every time pour two packets of coffee powder mix, you got any idea how thick the coffee is or not?! You can go sleep or not? Drink so much coffee, later you make a din in the house in the middle of the night again la!” His irritated voice sounded throughout the house as she served him coffee.

"You my boyfriend mah. Of course you do for me la. You know massage one what, I don’t know leh!" She told him that day when they were at Ah Ma’s house. Ah Ma had asked her to give her a massage on the shoulders. She remembered his baffled face when she used it as her frequent retort that afternoon.

“Eh you come out can or not? I want to brush my teeth! You have been inside for almost two hours! You come out!!” She remembered his impatient bellow as he banged his fist on the bathroom door.

"Eh. Irritating la. Why the chili sauce doesn't come out? Then how I eat my fried eggs??" She had glared at the bottle of chili sauce angrily and complained in her loud voice.

"This bottle is new la. You got to........." Wei Lian's voice trailed off from the sudden shock he got when he heard a loud crash and bits of glasses cracking apart.

"I ya like that la, can liao lor. So easy. Ya, what you want to say?" She cut off Wei Lian’s words.

“Eh. You can use a bowl to pour out the canned fruits or not? You very lazy la."

“Can you don’t slurp your drink? Irritating la!” She remembered his annoyed face.

She remembered her fingers holding onto his hand weakly and his awkward concern at the hospital, "Eh. Okay or not? How come like that?"

"Err, oh! I’m selling some small bears for charity. The proceeds will go to the Children's Society. Five dollars each only."

"Buy one la Wei Lian! Support Fang Qi mah..." She remembered Cherie nudging him playfully. Wei Lian had promptly reached into his jeans pocket for his wallet and dug out a five-dollar note.

"Ok lor, give me one." He offered.

"Let's go, we're late." She watched him gently held onto Cherie's arm. He can't stand me, she had thought sadly.

She remembered watching Wei Lian and Cherie walked away from her and again engaging in a nobody-can-interrupt-us conversation. She remembered staring after them. She remembered seeing Cherie playing with the bear Wei Lian just bought from her. She remembered him giving her the bear…..
She remembered everything about him.

From the first time he came into her life to that very night he broke down and chased her away. She recalled all her different methods of irritating him. She didn’t realize they shared so many memories. Wonderful memories. Memories that may have seemed trivial then but meant everything in the world to her now.

Fang Qi looked up around her and discovered the blurred sight before her. She is crying again. How many times has she cried since she left and came back? Countless times. She knew she cried countless times. She could no longer keep track, she discovered, as she wiped off her tears with the back of her hand.

Suddenly, the bustling crowd caught her eye as they walked past her, throwing her curious glances. But she wasn’t in the mood to pick a quarrel. Suddenly she smirked to herself. Ever since she knew Wei Lian, she has tamed her own temper bit by bit, except in front of him. She hasn’t purposely picked a fight with anyone in a very long while.

She scanned the crowd around the concourse area. Everyone was either in pairs or groups. She was the only one without a companion. And for a very long while, she just allowed herself to slump her back against the metal railing of the stairs. Till she didn’t know how long she has been sitting down there.

Suddenly she had a craving for rum and raisin ice cream. She finally got up and dragged herself slowly towards the ice cream booth she and Wei Lian had patronized the last time they met. “Excuse me, can I have rum and raisin please? Double scoop.”

As she placed her order, someone called out from the other side of the ice cream store, “Hello, hello! One rum and raisin please!” Fang Qi froze immediately, her heart thumped furiously. The voice was too familiar. She didn’t need to look over to see who was that. In fact she just wanted to disappear into thin air at this moment. Wei Lian….Her lips mouthed his name silently.

Chapter 31

2006-03-08T00:57:00.000-08:00

Wo Shi Zhe Ba Hen Duo Hen Duo De Shi Ji Dao Wo Xin Li Mian, Mei Xiang Dao Wo De Xin Bian De Geng Da Le… Zhuang De Man Man De Dou Shi Ni…

Chapter 31

A figure stood at the entrance to the café, hiding behind the large afternoon crowd in the café. Fang Qi had arrived back in Singapore the day before. She was supposed to meet Jake at the café this very day as the rest were getting together to celebrate Christmas as well as support Wei Lian’s performance. Jake urged her to take this opportunity to tell Wei Lian how she really feels for him. She had told Jake to head for the café first as she was still not mentally prepared to show up and confess her feelings. What if he rejects me? What if he says eh you siao ah? We were only acting, you really took it so seriously meh? She didn’t know if she would be able to take anymore hurt. But she knew she had to do it.

The moment she stepped into the café, the familiarity of his voice filled her heart. His deep voice. The voice that used to chide her, scold her, tease her, irritate her. How she missed his voice. But as she heard him speak, her heart pounded furiously, her mind went into a whirl. She dared not bring herself to listen to what he is going to say next. Someone special in his heart. Who else could it be, except for Cherie? She knew she came back to fight for her own happiness but her emotions were overpowering her brains. She went limp at the moment she heard Wei Lian’s voice. Everything seemed to be a daze. She just didn’t know what to do next. Looking at the figure sitting on the faraway stage, her legs were as heavy as her heart.

“Zhao xun yi ge mei you ji mo de di fang
Yi ge ni he wo de tian tang
Jiu suan shi mian qiang
Ceng jing zou guo de mei yi ge huang tang
Jin wo zhe ni de shou zai duo kun nan
Wo men dou jian qiang…

Her heart ached as his angst-ridden voice filled the café, singing the heart-wrenching song. She felt like running to the stage and tell him “Tan Wei Lian! I’m back!” She felt like throwing her arms around him to hug him, to feel that familiar warmth he always radiated. But she knew she couldn’t. The song was not for her. It was for his someone special. Cherie.

As she reluctantly tore her gaze away from Wei Lian, she suddenly spotted Cherie sitting at the table in front of the stage, looking engrossed in Wei Lian’s song. Cherie had a look of admiration on her face as she looked at Wei Lian with a big smile. Fang Qi heart fell. It just kept falling, as if towards a bottomless pit. She was devastated. Suddenly she felt as if she couldn’t breathe. Cherie is still in his life. His someone special.

“This special person. Erm, she’s so special that she changed my life completely, Erm I should say she turned it upside down la haha. I don’t know how to talk well, all I want to say is in this song…” As Wei Lian said his heartfelt words halfway through the song, Fang Qi dragged herself out of the café. She couldn’t bear to hear it anymore. All the courage she had built within her was smashed within seconds. She shook her head violently, trying to force out all that she had heard. It was suffocating her. She didn’t know what to do, what to think, where to go. All she knew was - it was all over.

“Nah, your chicken wings,” Jason plonked into his seat and snuggled close to Cherie, settling the plate of chicken wings on the table. “Eh, I think I saw Fang Qi at the door just now leh.” Jason’s voice sounded worried. “Really??” Cherie turned to the café’s entrance and scanned the area for Fang Qi. “Where? I don’t see her lay.”

“I saw her standing behind the crowd listening to Wei Lian’s song. But before I could make my way through to get her, she already turned and left.” Jason lowered his voice and said to Cherie, “She looked very sad.” They both looked knowingly at each other and sighed. They knew Fang Qi still refuses to face up to her feelings. At least Wei Lian already knows what he wants. It was all written in his song for her.

“Erm, dear, could Fang Qi have misunderstood?” Jason, as if struck by a sudden revelation, directed his question at Cherie. “She left when Wei Lian said the song is for someone special. And you were the only one sitting at the table just now.” Cherie frowned and bit her lip. Knowing Fang Qi, she must have jumped to her own conclusion. She must have thought that Wei Lian was singing the song for me.

“Yoo hoo everybody!” A sharp voice broke Cherie’s thoughts suddenly. Jace sauntered towards their table, with her newfound boyfriend by her side. As usual her hands were all over her boyfriend. “This is my darling! Handsome anot??” She asked laughingly as she introduced her boyfriend to them. Jason and Cherie couldn’t help smirking. This is Jace. Her pattern never changed. She still likes to touch people all over and say all sorts of mushy stuff. Never mind la, this guy looks like a willing party anyway, they laughed quietly to themselves.

“Wah you’re all here already! Sorry I’m late!” Jake quipped as he joined them at the table shortly after Jace arrived. He had been trying to call Fang Qi the whole morning to arrange to pick her up and come to the café together. She had told him last night that she will make her way there herself, but he was not convinced. He knew this girl too well. It will take a lot for her to swallow her pride and make her feelings known to Wei Lian. He could see that she loves Wei Lian a lot. There was no doubt about that. He was just afraid she backs out at the last minute.

Jake looked around the café briefly and asked the rest, “Fang Qi is not here yet?” Cherie shot Jason a look. This Jake still hasn’t given up on Fang Qi? Not knowing that Jake was the one who asked Fang Qi to join them at the café, Jason answered quickly, “Hah? Fang Qi? She’s back meh? Didn’t see her lay.”

“Ya, she’s back.” Jake didn’t want to elaborate too much. What was important is that Fang Qi shows up now and fight for her own happiness. He looked at his handphone and deliberated on whether to call her again.

“Hello hello!” Wei Lian chirped happily as he joined them at the table. Cherie and Jason could see that their good friend was masking his feelings. They knew he was putting up a front. His sorrow, his longing for Fang Qi to return, was written all over his face and heard in his voice when he sang that special song. They didn’t know how to tell him that Fang Qi was here but left halfway. And they were still puzzled how Jake knew Fang Qi is back. Did they return to Singapore together? Not wanting to complicate matters at this point in time, they decided to keep quiet.

Wei Lian sat down next to Jason and took a gulp of water from the glass Jason offered him. “How? Many of you came ah? Haha.” He asked. “Wei Liaaaaaaaan! I’m here with my boyfriend la! I dowan you liao la!” Jace opened her mouth to boast about her boyfriend. Wei Lian almost choked on his water. Wah heng ah, you dowan me, better than striking lottery man! He thought to himself.

Laughter rang out as Jace said that. Wei Lian recognized a familiar laugh. “Eh? Jake, you came back already? Where have you been man!” he said excitedly. Jake had left Singapore for a couple of months and hadn’t contacted them at all. Sometimes, Wei Lian will wonder if he had gone to look for Fang Qi and maybe they had even patched back.

“Yo brother! Yah lah, I just came back from the States. Went for holidays mah….” Jake trailed off as a familiar song started playing over the café’s sound system. “Ai shi ni yan li de yi shou qing ge….” He noticed Wei Lian shifting uncomfortably in his seat and crossing his arms on the table, sipping his drink quietly. Did he know that this was Fang Qi’s favourite song? He decided to take a chance and find out. “Wah haven’t heard this song for a long time. It’s Fang Qi’s favourite song.” He purposely spoke about Fang Qi.

At the mention of Fang Qi’s name, Wei Lian’s heart skipped a beat. Her voice had already invaded his mind when the song started. “Can you sing Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge??” Huh, why Jake suddenly mentioned her? Is he trying to tell us something? Seeing that Jake had stopped talking, he asked in his most nonchalant tone, “So you and Fang Qi how?”

Huh? He still thought I haven’t given up on Fang Qi? This brother of his is still a block of wood when it comes to relationships. Can’t he feel how Fang Qi feels for him, before she left?

Wei Lian, hearing no response, thought he had hit a sore spot, so he kept quiet. Hai! After all they have been the closest of cousins since young, how can Jake not know his pattern? He must have thought we are still together, Jake thought to himself, almost shaking his head. He was still wondering if he should help Fang Qi that silly girl. It seems to him now that he’s got to give that extra kick to get Wei Lian started.

He was curious to know how much Fang Qi means to this silly cousin of his. And surely, there is something that the stubborn girl likes about Wei Lian, if not she won’t end up feeling so miserable. Dabbling with music and singing songs - he knew Wei Lian can handle, with much ease. But he doesn’t dare to have too high hopes on him when it comes to love relationships. It’s either the silly girl understood his style, or she doesn’t.

“Hmm…why bro? You miss her is it? Must be long time didn’t quarrel with her you feel funny right?” Jake sounded, trying to see if his words would stir some other emotions or expressions in Wei Lian’s otherwise expressionless face. His words did. Finally. Huh? “Huh? I ya, you don’t anyhow say la. She is your girlfriend leh. I where dare to?” He replied with his nonchalant attitude.

Then Jake responded laughingly with a tinge of sadness,” Iyo! Me and Fang Qi? Please la. She already so obvious that she won’t ever accept me again, you think I still got chance meh? I gave up long ago liao la! And hor, I met someone new in the States leh! Congratulate me leh!” Jake looked at Wei Lian while saying all these. The little bit of reaction he stirred up did not stay on Wei Lian’s face for long. He returned to his expressionless self, his finger restlessly tracing the face of his Braille watch.

Jake heaved a long sigh. “Hai. Didn’t know the world is so small. I broke up with Fang Qi, I came back to look her up to talk things over but I met her at the beach house. You know how shocked and scared I was when she appeared? I am scared of her telling me that she is your girlfriend. One is my brother and one is the girl I love, frankly speaking, I don’t think I will be able to take it if it is true.” Jake paused for a while and studied Wei Lian’s facial expression. Still like a block of wood. Then he continued. “But luckily no lor. My heart almost went dead when she kissed you. But I knew she wanted to piss me off la. Haha..that girl ah, I must have hurt her too much that’s why she behaved that way. I no chance liao la. What to do? Who ask me to leave her that time? She gave me so many chances and I took my own sweet time to come back. Good luck to the next guy that comes along lor. He sure will be in for a hard time man.” Jake shook his head in despair. Does he get my hint or not? But knowing him well, Jake knew he was already deep in thoughts.

“Oh ya, eh actually how you both ended up knowing each other? I don’t remember introducing you to her when we were together. Always no chance to bring her along when we met.”

Ya. Isn’t it true? The world is indeed small. Wei Lian thought inside him. Jake used to come over to his house and bunk in often when they were both still in university. He knew he had a girlfriend whom he loves dearly and who also loves him a lot back then and of course, he had heard a lot about her. However, Jake’s girlfriend often had major tests to study for thus he was always never able to bring her over to bunk in when Jake is free to come. “Ya lor.” He quipped and continued sipping his drink.

Ya lor? Only “Ya lor”? Jake gulped down his water and then continued to pester for an answer. “Eh so how? Curious how you both ended up knowing each other lay.”

Wei Lian shrugged, replying him with a “Cannot stand her” kind of tone. “I ya she just irritated the hell out of me la and anyhow barged into my beach house one day la. She doesn’t behave a single bit the way you always described lay.” Jake noted the slight smile at the corners of his lips when he answered. “A very small world. Fate bah…now that you finally know who my ex-girlfriend is…” He purposely said it aloud. He emphasized on the “ex”.

Fate? That set Wei Lian’s mind thinking again. All the memories involving her gushed through his mind. She was Jake’s girlfriend whom he never had a chance to meet personally; she was the one whom he sang the song for on the streets four years back when she pleaded; she was the loud-mouthed girl he met at the café. Then came the day they met again at the café accidentally; that morning she came barging in through the door and insisted that he allowed her to stay….the day he found out she is Jake’s girlfriend; the day he knew she had came by the accessories shop four years ago; the day he hurt her so much that she left….too many coincidences. Fate? Maybe…..

Chapter 30

2006-03-07T21:54:00.000-08:00

Xiang Nian Shi Ke Yi Rang Ren Yue Ai Yue Shen. Na Deng Dai Ne…?

Chapter 30

Today, Wei Lian is playing to a full house at Jose’s Place Café. It’s Christmas Eve. It has been a tradition for Granny Gin to throw a big party at the café on Christmas Eve for her patrons to celebrate the occasion. The festive spirit is high and everyone is merry making while listening to Wei Lian’s performance. Today, he is scheduled to perform two sessions, one in the afternoon and one later at night.

Wei Lian seldom changed his selection of songs in his usual repertoire. He never feels the need to, except when he caught a nice song on radio. All the songs he chose are close to his heart, songs that bore a lot of meaning to him. Moreover, the audience never once got tired of listening to his songs. But tonight is different. Somehow, deep in his heart, a strange feeling overcame him. As usual, he doesn’t know what kind of feeling this is. There was a mix feeling of hope, disappointment, sadness and loneliness within him. He laughed to himself. What kind of feeling is this? He told himself to stop thinking but his mind ran against his wishes. Amidst the festive spirit, he knew that in a part of his heart, there is this feeling called hope. A yearning hope to meet her, to have her stand in front of him again. Yet, time and again, this hope turns into disappointment and left a trace of sadness and loneliness in him.

Hai! He sat on the high stool for a break and listened through the library of music tracks in his MP3 player, his face expressionless as usual. His fingers traced over the smooth surface of the MP3 player and at the same time pressing the “Next” button to scan through the songs. “Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge….” The first line of the song came on as his fingers hit the “Next” button. Suddenly his lips broke into a warm remising smile as he listened through the whole song. He always sang this song, but since when did he also like this song? He pondered, still smiling, his face a little hung down at the MP3 player. His smile became wider as he listened on.

"Eh you. Come with me, I want to scold you some more." He said. Really cannot stand Jace! No choice. Drag her with me la!

"Eh you siao ah? I am winning liao leh! Pull me into your room for what la? You better pay me my losses!!" Oh my god, money face leh this woman!

"I yo, can you don’t anyhow kick or not?" He turned and faced her direction. Every time also anyhow kick. Does she know what is called pain or not?!

"Cannot sleep." She kicked again.

He shifted again and pulled the blanket up. He turned his back against her and ignored her. "Go out and smoke la." Go out la, go out la. Don’t disturb me can?

"Cannot sleep means cannot sleep. Where got so many afraid of this and that? Just don't feel like smoking what, cannot meh??" She screamed back with an unhappy tone.

"Then how? Go and bang the wall la. You surely will be able to sleep." Mean thoughts ran through his mind.

"Eh!!" She screamed again. He refuses to answer her anymore. Don’t care. I want to sleep. Very tired.

"Eh you can don't keep pulling or not?" He couldn't stand her harassing anymore. Irritating. Irritating. Irritating! His clothes suddenly became loose and feel larger, must be all her fault!

"I ya can la, can la, you let me follow you la ok?" She decided for him. Cannot lay, don’t want you to follow lay.

"You said you like the beach house. Since you find it boring now, you leave la." He tried to push her hands away and tried to walk past the makeshift dinning table but she stopped him. He resisted.

"You are afraid people will be mistaken issit? Or you got something to hide?" He heard her challenging tone.

"I ya you don't bo liao la." Was all he could reply.

"Then???" her voice raised by ten decibels. Iya whatever. He just wants to be out of the house now. Preferably without her following but…he knew it’s impossible.

"Iyo, you going to destroy Ah Ma's things already la." Can she kick her kicking habits?

"What la? You one day never say me you not happy issit?" She sounds upset.

"You think just because you help me fool Ah Ma you have the right to say me issit?" Got meh? He got think like that meh? No what…She think too much la.

"Iya, we are friends mah, plus you are my buddy's sister, so since we already started the act, then I help to carry on lor. You don't say until I so unwilling can a not." He is trying to help only mah. She really is think too much la!

"Eh, you know what you talking about or not? You are my girlfriend mah. I where dare to forget what you like ah? Wait you angry with me again how?" She said before mah. My memory so good, how can forget?

"Iya, I’m okay la. Nothing one la. Always like that what. Hurt a bit won’t die one la. Take soup for you mah." Hai! Just trying to be nice to her mah. Trying to be only mah….iya don’t care la.

"Er, you can always visit Ah Ma soon ma, don’t be so sad la. You still got Fang Tong, got all your friends, got me ma. Don't cry liao la, cry baby." Can she not cry? She everything also don’t care one what. I ya…why she cry?

He was always mean to her. He let out a silent chuckle inside him as he thought of the number of times he had made her mad by going against her purposely. He pressed the “Play” button on the MP3. Maybe she will suddenly appear if he sings this song? He laughed at himself for having that silly thought. But instead of hearing the song come to a complete stop, he heard the introduction of the song he penned specially for her. He had accidentally pressed the “Next” button. He allowed the MP3 player to continue playing the song. He wondered if she would know that he had penned the song specially for her? He wondered if she would ever know the meaning of the song and if she would ever accept it. He wondered if he would even have the chance to sing it to her personally. Clutching the MP3 player, he fell into deep thoughts once again…

It has been six months since she left him. He has never once stopped thinking of her. Memories of her never ceased to penetrate his mind. Every single thing reminded him of her. The beach house. The café. The shopping mall. The coffee she loves to drink. The way she doesn’t give way and face to him. Her barbaric ways. The way she loves to suddenly appear to grab his arm and hook hers onto his. Everything. Now, listening to the merrymaking of the café patrons made him feel a surge of loneliness. A hollowness in his heart. A hollowness that only one person can fill and make it whole again. She. He doesn’t want to deny it.

Taking a deep breath, he took off the earpieces and kept away his MP3 player. Adjusting himself on the high stool, he gently retrieved his guitar from behind him and strapped it over himself. Clearing his throat , he spoke into the microphone as he started to strum his guitar. “Thank you for joining me here today on Christmas Eve. I hope you’ve enjoyed the songs I’ve brought to you earlier. I’d like to share with all of you the following song which I had written recently.” He paused for a moment. Memories of her started flooding back again. Fang Qi…

“Can you sing Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge??”

"I am saying can I stay here for a few days?" the voice said again.

"Can I say no a not?" he held onto the door, afraid that she will just dash in suddenly.

"Cannot. Let me stay here for a few days, I don’t want to go home." He heard a hint of persistence in her barbaric tone.

"I ya I’m so cute, you cannot resist me la." Who on earth will say herself cute? Don’t know how true also la. Hmm. Better don’t believe her words too much.

"Eh, you free a not?" "Be my boyfriend lay." So direct. Hmm haha! Goes well with her character isn’t it?

"Wah, you finally back from your hot date ah?"

What, what? Your hot date with your Cherie mah! People ask you out you agree immediately, I ask you to help me with something small, I have to beg you until I go on my knees!!" Noisy. Irritating! He wanted to bark back at her!

"Who are you la? You think you are really my girlfriend meh?!!" " You think I really want to help you? If you are not Fang Tong's sister, I can't be bothered about you man. You think you really very attractive meh? No wonder Jake dumped you last time! You think I like you to stay here meh? I pity you only!"

"Rum and raisin!" “Wah, you also like rum and raisin ah? Wei Lian also loves it leh!" Cherie chirped, hooking her arm into his. She likes Rum and raisin ice cream too?

"I... I just want to see if you are ok..." Fang Qi finally said meekly.

"What's there to see? Hah? What do you know? You think you who ah? You know what I'm thinking meh? You think you know everything issit? You don't know ok!! Why are you following me ha? You can leave me alone or not? Why must you appear in front of us?? If you didn't appear, everything will be just fine!!! Why? What you want!! Just go away! Go! Just go!” He screamed with all his might.

Wei Lian’s eyes turned misty, his heart knotted up with guilt. Why did he always have to be so mean to her? Why did he hurt her so deeply? Why did he not treasure her when she was still by his side? From the time she came into his life till the moment she left him, he has not once said a nice word to her. But he knew that was the way they communicated and it suited them fine then. It was precisely how they communicated that feelings possibly grew without themselves knowing. When she comes back, I won’t bicker with her. When she comes back, I won’t hurt her again. When she comes back…

“I actually wrote this song for someone. Someone really special in my heart.” He said softly but surely, with a tinge of pride. He wanted to say that it is someone who has brought happiness and liveliness to his otherwise mundane life. Someone who has managed to subconsciously made him face up to his feelings. Someone who has shown him the way to love. But he couldn’t bring himself to say it. He still wasn’t used to expressing his feelings, especially to a huge crowd. To him, as long as he knew exactly how he felt himself, it was enough already. He wondered if she also knew that.

Chapter 29

2006-03-05T08:17:00.000-08:00

“Xi Guan Ni, Jiu Ba Wo Dang Zuo Ni, Rang Wo Men Zai Yi Qi Hu Xi…”

Chapter 29

Fang Qi carefully took off the apron on her and hung it back onto the clothes hook. She smiled with a hint of reluctance at the white apron she has been donning for the past few months. Today is her last day at work. As the day closes in, with the crowd gradually dispersing, her heart fell heavy with tinkering pain.

Six months. Finally, her probation has come to an end. But she has decided to leave the job. She thought, smirking to herself, “Why am I leaving such a carefree job with such a high pay? Fang Qi, you really got nothing better to do. What you want to do now? Go traveling? Go visit Ah Ma? Go…..” Back to Singapore? She fell silent and stared at the locker’s room floor. There is only her in the locker’s room.

It has been months since she left the country. All these while, she has actually been in the States but she dared not look for Ah Ma. She doesn’t want Ah Ma to worry for her. And she doesn’t want Ah Ma to nag at her too. But she knew in her heart that the bottom line is that she doesn’t know how she is going to face Ah Ma if she asks about Wei Lian. Each time she thought of how much Ah Ma loves and dotes on her, her conscience pricked her and guilt sets in. How? She repeatedly asked herself. How is she going to tell Ah Ma that she had actually asked Wei Lian to act as her boyfriend, just to make her happy?

Wei Lian --- just the thought of this name, her heart ached awfully and her eyes brimmed with tears. She did not want Ah Ma to see her like that. She had too much pride in her. She couldn’t bear to see Ah Ma’s disappointed face. She saw it once when Jake left. And she wasn’t prepared to see it once again. Fang Qi knew all at once that she would never be able to handle Ah Ma’s disappointment.

Wei Lian’s last words pricked her constantly. “What are you doing here?! Just go la! Don’t stand here and look at me la!....I tell you ah, you better don’t follow me ah! Don’t come and irritate me!” Wei Lian’s harsh words tore her heart apart. She had never seen him like this before. So despaired…so disappointed…..so

She knew he was just venting his anger, venting all the disappointment he felt inside him. She became his punching bag. Her tears had fallen more furiously as he continued to hurl all his disappointment. She doesn’t want to leave him alone.

“I already said, don’t follow me! You don’t understand issit?” Wei Lian flared up, his voice as loud as anything, shrieking and trembling with immense anger in the middle of the silent cold night.

“I….I just want to see if you are ok….” She had replied meekly. His sudden anger frightens her.

“What’s there to see? Hah? What do you know? You think you who ah? You know what I’m thinking meh? You think you know everything issit? You don’t know ok!! Why are you following me ha? You can leave me alone or not? Why must you appear in front of us?? If you didn’t appear, everything will be just fine!!! Why? What you want!! Just go away! Go! Just go!” Wei Lian screamed.

Ya. Perhaps he is right. I don’t know anything…I shouldn’t have appeared in front of him. I shouldn’t have appeared in his life at all. If only..I didn’t get him to act for Ah Ma…..

She looked longingly at wallpaper on the hand phone screen. It was a picture of Wei Lian and her. She had grabbed his hand phone from his hands when he was unaware. “Oei, what are you doing? Why take my hand phone? Give me back!” Wei Lian immediately hollered at her when she wrestled it out of his hand while he was reaching out for the soft pillow on the sofa.

“Don’t want la. I want to take picture lay. Your hand phone very advanced lay! 2.0 mega pixels one. Good stuff lay! Lend me take a picture can die ah……” She retorted. Again, again. She is at it again. Cannot ah? Can die ah? Wei Lian thought with despair. Every time this kind of reply. Nothing new!

“Hahaha! Now my picture will follow you wherever you go and haunt you! You cannot escape from my clutches liao!” She had teased him.

“Eh, come lay! We take a picture together lay! “ She put the hand phone camera in front of them and hugged him from behind. “Nah! Return you.” She bluetoothed the picture of them to her hand phone and stuff it back into his hands. His face was a gloomy black. “Oh oh, someone angry liao ah?” Her face came near his. Don’t care. Little bit already face black! She quipped quietly inside her.

That was the only photo she had of him. Her finger traced the face on the display screen. She missed that face dearly. Suddenly, a huge drop of water splattered on the hand phone screen. The photo blurred. Splat. Another drop of water splattered onto the hand phone screen yet again. Fang Qi held up her hand and felt for her face. Her cheeks were wet. Her eyes felt a stinging pain. Tears. Those drops of water on her hand phone screen were her tears. She slumped against her own locker and bent down, her face buried in her knees. Lonely. She felt so lonely without his constant scolding, his irritated voice, his soft voice, his…she missed him! A great deal…

She has been working in a small restaurant in the States to earn some money and pass time. All these while, she has been working and doing volunteer work at the same time. She really thought that if she kept herself busy and drowned herself with work, she wouldn’t have time to think of Wei Lian. She is drained out physically and mentally…..she wouldn’t have thought of him…but…apparently she was wrong! Every time she sees something that reminds her of the times she shared with him, memories of him will start flooding her head. ‘Damn it!’ she thought. How am I ever going to get him out of my mind? Her hand slapped the cold flooring, her hand phone slipped out of her hands and onto the cold unfeeling floor.

But little did she know that back in Singapore, Wei Lian is doing the same thing --- keeping himself busy so that he will not think so much of her. And failing badly too…

All these while, she had gone to Ah Ma’s house for a few times but each time she just stood at the gate, not daring to go in. She had been observing from outside quietly and watching what Ah Ma had been doing whenever she was free. Ah Ma loves to sit outside on her rocking chair and look at the beautiful sunset. She always had a longing look on her face and a photo frame in her hands. She needn’t take another look at it. She knew it’s the photograph that Ah Ma had requested to take of the three of them. Wei Lian, Ah Ma and her….

Ah ma had doted on her since young. She remembered how Ah Ma fussed over her when she was a kid and even now. Ah Ma was the closest and dearest person to her - more than anyone else.

Yes, Ah Ma always nagged at her but she knows she is truly concerned about her. She knew Ah Ma always wanted the best for her. Ah Ma had been very picky on her past boyfriends as she wanted to make sure that Fang Qi will not get bullied. When Ah Ma knew that she was together with Wei Lian, she was truly very happy about it. She noticed that Ah Ma doted on Wei Lian even more than her ever since.

But Ah Ma’s health has not been good after she came back to the States. Although Fang Qi did not want Ah Ma to know she is back, she was worried sick about her health. She had asked Ah Ma’s neighbour to help keep an eye on her as Ah Ma is alone at home most of the time. But she also pleaded with the neighbour not to mention anything about her return to Ah Ma. She will come and see Ah Ma eventually but not yet. Not now. She hadn’t sorted out her feelings properly. She just needed more time…

It had been raining the past few days. Fang Qi’s mood was as gloomy as the skies outside. Sitting at the table by the side, she was eating the bowl of chicken chowder the chef had specially made for her to bid her farewell. But instead of eating it happily, she only had a few mouthful of the chowder. No appetite. She hadn’t had much appetite since she came here. Wei Lian’s eating manner surfaced in her mind. She enjoyed seeing him eat. Somehow, whatever he ate, it seemed so good and appetizing.

She stared into space through the glass interior of the restaurant, listening to the pitter patter of the rain hitting against the glass window. There weren’t many customers as it was already after the dinner peak hour. Fang Qi looked intently at the pouring rain, her thoughts wandering again. The rain reminded her of Wei Lian. She remembered how they ran for shelter from the rain, not forgetting to bicker at the same time… As her gaze fell upon a loving couple running for shelter outside the restaurant, she fiddled with a wine glass that was laid out on the table and pondered. What could that idiot be doing now? Busking? Stoning at home? Out with Che…

Suddenly her handphone rang and broke her thoughts. Fumbling with her handphone, she answered the call. As she spoke, her face changed and a sharp breaking sound of the wine glass sounded through the quiet restaurant. Within a matter of seconds, she had dashed out of the restaurant.

Ah Ma’s neighbour had called her to tell her Ah Ma was sick and has been hospitalized. Upon reaching the hospital she dashed up to the ward and barged through the door worriedly. The moment she saw Ah Ma lying on the bed, she fell to her knees and broke into tears. “Ah Ma, you can’t leave me alone. You cant…” she sobbed. Ah Ma was sick but it wasn’t anything serious, only a bout of indigestion. It was just that Ah Ma’s neighbour panicked upon seeing Ah Ma’s face so pale, that the first reaction was to send her to hospital.

Fang Qi, thinking that Ah Ma was seriously sick, just broke down and let free her emotions. All the turmoil she had been experiencing these few months, all the heartache, everything just came pouring out. She could hold back no longer. Ah Ma lifted her weak hand to touch Fang Qi’s face, wiping off her tears and said gently, “Ok ok, Ah Girl, don’t cry already. Don’t worry, Ah Ma is ok, nothing serious la. Ah Ma still want to see you get married one leh.”

Get married? Who is she going to marry wor? Fang Qi thought sadly, her mind immediately filled with images of Wei Lian. Her tears flowed even more as Ah Ma’s words went through her thoughts. As she brushes her tears away, she caught Ah Ma looking at her questioningly. Suddenly, she was filled with guilt. She knew Ah Ma was referring to Wei Lian. She knew Ah Ma liked him a lot. But…she knew, it was impossible. And it was time she told Ah Ma…she decided.

“Ah Ma…I got something to tell you.” She paused, finding courage to continue. Just talking about it brought back the aching feeling in her heart. Moreover she didn’t want to upset Ah Ma in her condition, so she tried searching for the right words to say. “Sorry….Ah Ma. Actually, actually…..” She didn’t know how to continue. Ah Ma’s concerned face made her tear again. Constantly wiping away her tears, she tried to continue. Wei Lian is not my boyfriend. No voice came out from her mouth. Finally, “I didn’t mean to bluff you, but I didn’t want you to worry about me. Sorry…”

Ah Ma looked at her for a long while before she finally sighed, “You want to tell me Wei Lian is not your boyfriend right?” Fang Qi looked up at the frail looking elderly woman and nodded silently. She got to admit she is lying.

In between tears, Fang Qi told Ah Ma how she had begged Wei Lian to help her act as her boyfriend……

"Be my boyfriend lay."

"Ask Jake." Still no expression from him. For nothing, why ask him be her boyfriend? Err... I ya, must be up to no good lor, this woman, he thought skeptically. Don't care.

"Don't want." She refused.

"He is your boyfriend." He finally settled on a music channel.

"He is not. He dumped me!"

Oh. So he is correct. Jake and Fang Qi have got a past.

"He is jealous." The music channel was playing a messy rap song. Boring.

"I'm not bad one leh."

"I cannot see. I don't know... I ya, who keep SMS-ing me la?" He took out his handphone and retrieved the SMS-es coming in.

"So what? At least I not ugly what."

"Whatever." He lazily listened to the SMS-es and proceeds to trash them.

"Oei, be my boyfriend leh!!." She can't stand him showing his can't-be-bothered attitude.

"Don't want la." He throws his handphone onto the table.

"Help me a bit will die issit??"

"Maybe."

"............" Damn you! She cursed. Then she softened and poked his arm gently. "Iya can la. Other than you, I don't know who to approach liao la." Her attitude changed 360 degrees.

"Scroll through your handphone lor, surely got people you can call." He flipped over on his back and "stared" at the ceiling.

"Kelvin Tan Wei Lian! Help me la, my grandma is arriving here on Saturday from the States. It's only for one week. She is staying only for one week la." She pulled at his sleeve, her voice sounded helpless.

"I ya don't want la. Tell your grandmother the truth that you broke up with your boyfriend la."

"I just told her ok. Tong told her I have a boyfriend." All along Fang Tong and her pretended that she had a boyfriend to keep their grandmother from worrying.

"Who asked you to say you have? Say you broke up la." He shifted and hugged the pillow instead.

"I don't want her to worry mah. You help me can die ah? Not as if I'm asking you to really be my boyfriend what. Not telling you to really love me what. Help la. Once she's out of sight, we don't have to pretend liao. Anyway we also hugged and kissed before liao what. You shy ah?" She was almost pleading with him.

"You very bo liao la you. You go and kick your bad habits first then we?ll talk..." He turned and slept on his front again, covering his head with the pillow.

"What bad habits?"

"Gambling, drinking, smoking, noisy, not gentle, unladylike, like to curse and swear, talk loudly, rude, bad attitude........." He began listing a long list of what he thinks are her bad habits…….

Wei Lian kicked away his blanket in frustration and sat upright. He cannot believe that she can continue bugging him even when he is asleep. Such persistence! "I ya I give up la!"

"Really??" Fang Qi's eyes sparkled when she heard him say that. Finally! But his face was darker than the sky outside. She knew she caught him in a worst possible timing. But she had no choice.

"Meet your grandma only right?!" he blasted impatiently, his fingers running through his hair in frustration.

"Ya. Act as my boyfriend." She replied gleefully.

"Ok. I help you. BUT I got conditions." He didn't even bother getting her agreement. He decided it for her. "After I help you, you got to move out. And, you cannot bug me anymore. You cannot interfere in my personal matters also!" Last resort to drive her away. Finally he gave in to her request because he really couldn't stand her constant bugging.

Sounds reasonable. "On la." Fang Qi chirped.

"Ok, let's get to work!" she jumped in front of Wei Lian and pressed him down to sit on the sofa.

"What do I like to eat?" Fang Qi asked, making Wei Lian rehearse his answers to her grandma's favourite "interrogation" questions.

"How I know?" She always eats cup noodles and whatever she found.

"Bread with peanut butter and jam la." FQ rolls her eyes. Purposely one, he definitely is doing it on purpose.

"K." He answered curtly. He cannot be too bothered with her.

"What's my favourite colour?" "Pink." "No la!!!" she shrieked. "Alamak, it's blue la!" "How I know. I thought all girls like pink what" He was all out to irritate her……

Lying on the hospital, Ah Ma was listening to the funny scenarios Fang Qi described as she begs Wei Lian to act as her boyfriend. Ah Ma studied Fang Qi for a moment, her heart ached at the sight of the granddaughter smiling at her own description. She was clearly upset but yet she was making a dig at herself by laughing out loud at herself. “How stupid la this Tan Wei Lian. He made me changed all my bad habits before he agreed to role play as my boyfriend lor. He is such a hard nut to crack…….you know how worried I am or not when he refuses to give in….” Fang Qi laughed. Yet her tone choked with sorrow.

Finally Ah Ma spoke. “I know, Ah Girl, actually Ah Ma knows you were not seeing anyone after Jake left. I forced Ah Tong to tell me. You know how heartbroken we felt when we saw you become another person after your break up with Jake?” Ah Ma gave Fang Qi’s hand a comforting squeeze.

Ah Ma and Fang Tong couldn’t bear to see her giving up on herself totally. She had put so much into the relationship with Jake that she was totally devastated when he left. But her grief had dragged on for too long and she had become a completely different person, acquiring many bad habits. She has got to let go, completely let go.

That was why when Ah Ma came back to Singapore, Fang Tong deliberately told Fang Qi that Ah Ma wanted to see her boyfriend. Knowing Fang Qi’s pattern, she is bound to ask someone to pose as her boyfriend. They knew her inside out. They knew the girl was full of pride and she wouldn’t want to explain too much. So it wasn’t surprising at all that she would get herself a pretend-boyfriend. But they didn’t expect her to get Wei Lian to help. Fang Tong thought that she will enlist the help of any of her classmates. So when he found out that his little sis had gotten to know Wei Lian and even stayed at his beach house, he was extremely surprised.

Fang Qi was taken aback when she heard that from Ah Ma. She looked down on the hospital floor quietly. So Ah Ma knew everything already and she was also playing along so as not to expose them. She wanted to kick herself. She felt stupid and small. All this while when she thought she was helping herself by getting Wei Lian to act as her boyfriend, she was also slowly killing herself. Because she had subconsciously fallen for him. And now there’s no turning back.

“Ah Girl, you know ah, Wei Lian is a very good boy. I so old already see so many people and so many of your boyfriends. I know how to judge a person whether he is good or not. You must really treasure Wei Lian okay? Wei Lian likes you one, Ah Girl, Ah Ma can’t be wrong.” Ah Ma assured Fang Qi confidently.

With this, Fang Qi only sobbed more uncontrollably. She couldn’t help it. The words came surging through in her confused mind again.

You can leave me alone or not? Why must you appear in front of us?? If you didn’t appear, everything will be just fine!!! Why? What you want!! Just go away! Go! Just go!”

She bit her lower lip. “No, Ah Ma, he doesn’t like me one. What I feel for him is only one-sided. The one he likes is Cherie. But Cherie likes another guy.” She hated herself for sounding so bitter.

“Oh yah, I saw him once on the streets with a girl, it should be the Cherie you’re talking about. I can tell that Wei Lian likes her a lot too. But hor, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you lor.”

“You think so easy to act as someone’s boyfriend and act till so real meh? For a moment, I thought it was real because he could answer all my questions and they are just the answers I want. He gives me the feeling that I can really entrust you to him. I don’t believe if he doesn’t have any feelings for you at all. Can’t you see he understands your character very well? Ah Ma can see lor. All these not easy to act one you know?”

"Yalor! She takes about one and a half hours in the bathroom and always sings loudly inside too!" Wei Lian chipped in.

"Ah Ma, to me, love doesn't need a reason. Happiness is not whether a person loves me or not, what matters is that I love her. She is my happiness."

All memories came flooding back in an instant. She remembered. Remembered Wei Lian’s words to her and Ah Ma.

Ah Ma went on with her must-fight-for-your-own-happiness theory while Fang Qi’s tears dried up.

“Tell me, do you like Wei Lian?” Fang Qi nodded. She knew she couldn’t hide from Ah Ma.

“Ah Girl, listen to Ah Ma. You must fight for your own happiness, cannot just sit there and wait for things to happen la! So what if he now likes that don’t know what Cherry or Strawberry? There is no guarantee that he won’t fall for you mah. Who knows what will happen right? Go, go fight for it, go fight it out with that Cherry and tell Wei Lian that you like him. If not you want to wait until they get married then regret all your life issit?”

Ah Ma’s words woke Fang Qi up like a loud gong sounding in her brain. Ah Ma is right, she should fight for her own happiness. Why should she be suffering in silence until like that just because that Tan Wei Lian likes Cherie? Why should she be hiding her feelings when she so much wanted to say out? After all she has always been the straightforward kind. Since when has she become so wishy-washy? She slumbered into deep thoughts. Since knowing Tan Wei Lian lor, she thought grudgingly.

A voice broke the silence of the hospital room, “Ah Ma, how are you feeling? Better or not?”

It was Jake, in US for a holiday. He had gone to look for Ah Ma at her home but was informed by her neighbour that she had just been hospitalized. He had rushed to the hospital, harbouring hopes that he would see Fang Qi there. He cannot deny to himself that he still had feelings for her. As he stood outside the ward, he overheard Ah Ma and Fang Qi’s conversation. Looking at Fang Qi’s despondent state, he saw the desire in her eyes to go back to Singapore immediately. As he looked at Fang Qi’s swollen eyes, his heart ached. The girl he onced loved so much was actually crying for another man. What an irony, he thought bitterly.

“Come on, Kerry, go pack your bags, we will return to Singapore tonight. I’ll go back with you, okay.” Jake said as she slumped against the bed railing of the bed behind her. He had given up completely. He knew he did not stand a chance anymore. “Go and find your happiness, Kerry.”

“Jake, drag her to the airport now. Now!” Ah Ma beckoned to Jake, joining in to persuade her.

Fang Qi opened her mouth to deny. She wanted to shout at Jake and tell him it was none of his business. That she didn’t need him to tell her what to do. But she swallowed her pride. But she knew Jake and Ah Ma were right. She straightened herself up, her heart brimming with newfound confidence and optimism. She was ready to face up to her feelings. I’m going to tell that idiot I like him. Even if he doesn’t reciprocate, she also had to tell him. Idiot Wei Lian! The most I turn and leave again. But…will he ask her to stay or not……

Chapter 28

2006-03-03T19:33:00.000-08:00

“Wai Mian Xia Zhe De Na Chang Da Yu, He Shi Cai Hui Dui Zhe Wo De Ling Luan Si Xu Yi Tong Ting Xi!

Chapter 28

It has been raining incessantly for the past two hours. As night fell, the heavy rain sounded even more relentless against the foggy window panes. Somehow, listening to the sounds of falling rain always had a calming effect on him, especially in the quietness of the night. But tonight, the unsettling feeling in his heart has failed to go away.

Since he returned from the accessories shop, he had been thinking a lot. Thinking too much in fact. Usually he would look for things to do to occupy his mind so that he will stop imagining things. But tonight, strangely enough, he wasn’t going to try and stop his thoughts. On the contrary, he seemed to relish them.

Pushing the window out slightly with his right hand, he felt a strong gush of wind rush in against his face. He stood still and let the wind whip against him face. He hoped the cold wind and rain could wake him up from his unsettled state. But to no avail. He stretched his hand out of the window and allowed the heavy raindrops to hit him on his palms. The rhythmic raindrops managed calm his senses a little but the thoughts running around in his head never diminished.

Wei Lian was clutching something tightly in his left hand, holding it close to his chest. It was the charity bear he had bought from Fang Qi the other time, the one and only thing that she had left him with. Every time Fang Qi came into his thoughts, he instinctively reached for the bear, which he placed next to his pillow.

To him, the bear held a significant meaning. It represented all the memories of the times he had with Fang Qi, happy or heartbreaking. It reminded him of her. It reminded him of the very first time his heart had experienced that nagging feeling. And now, feeling the bear in his hands, he knew that he has absolutely ascertained his feelings towards her.

Tonight, it’s raining again. How many times has it rained ever since Fang Qi left? He quietly memorized the number of times the rain had fallen. Nineteen times…. The rain has fallen nineteen times since she left. And every time it rained, the longing for her to be back by his side grew stronger. Every time it rained, emptiness filled up his heart rapidly.

Without her, his heart ached and grew increasing lonely. The whole house was horribly quiet. Sometimes, to shut out the deafening silence, he would turn on the music video channel on TV and blast the music out loud. Like what she used to do. He was missing that rowdy irritating voice dearly.

“Eh, faster la, rain getting heavier already, still walk so slow, like snail leh you!”
Pulling him roughly at his shirt, she was grumbling at the top of her voice.
“You want to get drenched your business ah, don’t drag me into it hor!”

That was when both of them were going back to the beach house after dinner at his mum’s place a few months back.

“Go and bathe la, still sit there?” She had screamed when he plonked himself onto the sofa once they reached the beach house.

“Iya wait la, I won’t fall sick la. You don’t sound like my mother can anot?” he rebutted.

“Eh please la, who cares if you are sick? I just don’t want you to dirty the sofa! I just cleaned it yesterday ok? And if you are sick hor, don’t expect me to look after you ah! Still don’t go bathe???” My goodness, this woman is more naggy than my mum, he had thought. Which man is going to want her?

While stoning by the window feeling the rhythm of the falling rain and smiling to himself at the thought of the funny times he had shared with Fang Qi, Wei Lian spontaneously started humming a tune, much to his surprise. He hasn’t written a song for a long time. After all that had happened these few months, he seemed to have lost the interest and the feeling of song writing. Something that he used to be so good at. Suddenly, the feeling returned, and the inspiration just flowed. He was filled with excitement and anticipation. He had not felt this way for a long while. With a swift motion, he closed the windows to prevent the rain from splattering in.

Making his way to his guitar lying beside his bed, he picked it up and started strumming the chords. Emotions flowed. Memories surged. And in no less than ten minutes, he had gotten the melody out. For Fang Qi. This shall be his first song for her. He hadn’t felt so inspired for a long time and he was exhilarated by how he felt. And he already had in mind the lyrics he wanted to write for the melody. It would be specially for her.

Putting back the guitar in the guitar case, Wei Lian reached out for his cup of coffee, which had already turned lukewarm. It has now become his daily addiction, and he can’t do without it every night. He slowly sipped the lukewarm coffee, and subconsciously lifted his free hand to his chain and started to play with the ring that was hanging on it. He wanted to have it by his side, so that he could give it to her if he had a chance to meet her again. Iyo, since when has he become so mushy ah??? He knew himself. He seldom did romantic things for girls. He prided himself for being a practical person. To him, what matters is the heart and not what you can do for the one you love. But this time, he didn’t know what came over him to suggest engraving her name on the ring. He didn’t care to find the answer. All he knew was he didn’t want to miss any chances again. That is, if the chances do come.

Maybe he was really going crazy, but this tingling feeling he had for the past few months had been unbearable. He has never felt this miserable before, where whatever Fang Qi had said and done kept coming back to “haunt” his thoughts. He wasn’t able to concentrate during his performances. Even though he always sang well, he lacked the emotions. When he goes out with his friends, more often than not he would end up stoning and shutting out the happy chatter. Why am I like that? Even during the times he had secretly loved Cherie, he did not experience such adverse pain.

This girl ah, why must she come and turn my life upside down lah! This girl ah……Does she knows that I am that guy who sang her her favorite song four years ago?....Didn’t she ever realized that I am always singing this song meh?.... As his mind started questioning again about his discovery of her being that irritating girl who begs him to sing her a song, he felt his eyelids turning heavy. Slowly, he fell into deep sleep, something that had been elusive for months before tonight.

2pm. As usual, Wei Lian set up his equipment in the Bugis area, where he was preparing to start performing for the day. His mood was exceptionally good, which surprised even he himself. I’m going to sing the song today, he told himself. He knows Fang Qi always hung out in this area. She may pass by here, he thought.

Hai! I’m hopeless la, whatever I do, it’s Fang Qi, Fang Qi and Fang Qi! What’s wrong with me la? I kena poisoned issit? If not, why is she constantly invading my mind! Suddenly, he chided himself quietly inside him. Then….He bit his lower lip. What is he thinking?

Seriously la, when she’s not here to scream and bicker with me, I feel very uncomfortable lay. Nobody to snatch for the remote control, nobody to sing in the bathroom as if it was her personal concert, nobody to make coffee for me…..

Yes, she might have left the country, but who knows, she might be back. Optimism flowed in his mind. He felt strangely good. He had always been a pessimist, always looking at the worst side of things. But today, he actually felt positive. He realized that having a positive outlook did make him feel much happier. Iya, don’t care lah, I just want to sing the song today la. What happier or not, optimistic or not, iyo not important la. The most important thing is, she likes the song,” he thought quietly to himself. Hai! He is thinking yet too much again. He closes his eyes and fell silent for a while and then opens them again. Okay! This shall be it. No more thinking for now. At least for now.

Finishing the first four songs from his usual repertoire of his favourite busking tunes, Wei Lian cleared his throat to proceed with his new song, his song for Fang Qi. Strumming the guitar introduction to the song, he closed his eyes and started singing….

Zhao xun yi ge mei you ji mo de di fang
Yi ge ni he wo de tian tang…

Attracted by the melodious new song, the crowd slowly grew, forming a big circle around Wei Lian. His beautiful rendition of the song, which he had written simple yet moving lyrics for, captured the attention of the audience. The strong emotions and feelings brought out in the song moved the hearts of the passing crowd. As Wei Lian ended the song, a loud applause broke out from the huge crowd that had gathered around him. He smiled and thanked everyone. Then he waited. He was half expecting someone to shout “Encore, encore!!” But after five minutes he realized it was all his wishful thinking. He chided himself quietly. Don’t be silly la, Tan Wei Lian. Where got so coincidental one? Smiling to himself while packing up to return home, he couldn’t help but feel a tinge of extreme disappointment.

Chapter 27

2006-03-03T01:50:00.000-08:00

"Ni Na Me Ai Ta, Wei Shen Me Bu Ba Ta Liu Xia, Wei Shen Me Bu Shuo Xin Li Hua…"

Chapter 27

“Ok la, whatever you say la. I won’t be coming back for dinner la. I already collected your jeans lor. You see when free then come and take lor. Where can I be? I am always at the beach house mah. ” Wei Lian strolled towards the direction of the front entrance of Daysprings Shopping Center, tapping his white cane with ease as he talked with an uninterested tone to the caller at the other end.

Amidst the busy hustle of the Daysprings Shopping Centre, Wei Lian felt the warmth of the sunrays coming from the clear glass roof top of the atrium as he navigated his way to his destination-the taxi stand. He turned his face away from the bright, warm rays of the sunlight. What kind of weather is this man? So bright and so hot until I can feel the sunrays coming my direction! The air-con not working is it? So hot! He complained grudgingly in his mind as he cocked his head from left to right slowly to ease the tiredness of his neck.

Frankly, if he had a choice, he wouldn’t agree to step into the mall again. He didn’t like to come here. But he reckoned he had no choice, for he was here to run some errands for his mum. No matter how he had tried to make excuses and push it away, his mum just wouldn’t relent.

“I just dozed off. You collect yourself la.” He grabbed his handphone from his pillow side and placed it close to his ears, feeling so sleepy and annoyed that his mum called just when he dozed off. “Mum”, read the speech reader software installed on his handphone.

“Wa Boy ah, I only want you to help me collect the altered jeans from Giordano, very difficult meh, still must beg you until like that is it?” Mrs Tan bellowed from the other end of the phone.

“I not free la, ask Dad la, or ask Jake. Or anyone except me.” Which mum would call at 7 am to ask her son to go Giordano and help collect the jeans she sent for alteration? “You make a trip there cannot ah? Go there walk walk and buy some clothes as well mah. I help you think of excuse for you to go and buy some new clothes leh. Why? Don’t want to help me is it? So near your beach house mah. You always hang out there mah, now the place is as old as you, you don’t want to go liao ha?” Want me to help so say help me think of excuse to go buy new clothes? What kind of reason is that? He clutched his hair with both his hand. Mrs Tan’s words stung his mind.

Ya. I don’t want to go there anymore. I hate that mall. His lips twitched, biting the corner of his lower lip. For a moment, he felt really tempted to reply her with that sentence. But he eventually kept quiet. He just didn’t want to elaborate on his reluctance to help. He doesn’t want her to continue her nagging. What he wished for now is to go back to sleep and forget about the jeans she made him collect for her totally.

“Iyo, why? What kind of son is this? I so difficult then bring up this son, now so big already then refuse to help his mother do a simple thing. Hai! What’s the use of having a son?” His mum started wailing. This is her pattern, always resorting to this method whenever she couldn’t make Wei Lian budge. “You help me can die is it? I am talking to wall or air ah?” She continued lamenting.

“You help me can die is it?”

“I am talking to wall or air ah?”

He shifted uncomfortably under his thick and soft blanket when his mum sprouted these two sentences. Those were exactly Fang Qi’s frequent retorts when he refused to help her or refused to reply her and ignored her. He sank deeper underneath his blankets and held the handphone slightly away from his ear.

“Ha? I ask you, you help me can die is it? Hello? I am talking to the wall or air ah?” Came his mum’s impatient tone.

Iya please stop it la. He begged inside his head. Finally, he relented. “Hai. Okay la, okay la. But I go after I sleep enough okay?” Wei Lian gave a weak reply. He was desperate to get off the phone. If he didn’t agree, she will nag till the cows come home. Should have ignored the call, he grumbled as his finger hovered over the “End Call” button.

It is not that he didn’t want to help his mum. It has been months, and the scenario at the shopping centre - the place he used to frequent and hang out with Fang Qi, Cherie and Jason remained freshly and deeply-etched in his memory.

Lest he gets emotional again, he has been trying his best to stay out of that place as far as he could. He rejected Cherie’s requests to accompany her to the mall and instead made her travel further down the beach house to the city area to buy her stuff. Cherie has been mad with him for a day because of that as she had been unable to buy the cardigan she wanted.

“Why me? Ask Jason la.” He tried to dissuade her from dragging him along.

“Who ask you to be free now?” She insisted that he stepped into Daysprings Shopping Center with her that same evening to pick up the cardigan she had reserved over the phone. And as soon as she left the boutique and suggested having dinner at the food court, he scooted out of the mall before she could finish her sentence. “I go home and eat noodles.” He still remembered Cherie shouting and screaming after him. And for that, she refused to talk to him for three days.

But he just couldn’t help it. It was here that he had wonderful times with Cherie and Jason. It was here that he had unforgettable squabbles and digging at each other with Fang Qi. And it was here that he sort of realized that the one he really cared for is Fang Qi. He couldn’t control himself. The memories just came flashing back. That same thumping feeling in his heart that he so frequently experienced when he thought of Fang Qi. He could imagine how hurt she was by his words so much so that she left the country. The feeling of closeness to Fang Qi… it all just felt so near yet so far. If only he didn’t hurl those insensitive words at her. If only he had realized reality earlier. If only….but he already ruined it by saying nasty things to hurt her. He just had to ruin it by saying nasty things to hurt her!

It’s just him. Not knowing how to express his feelings and blurting out things he didn’t mean to say. He really regretted his words. He had been missing her so much every single day. The pain in his heart was unbearable. He doesn’t know what to do. He tries not to think about her. But not a day passed without him hearing in his mind Fang Qi’s voice shouting at him. Every night he has been resorting to drinking her favorite coffee in hope of getting her out of his mind. He thought that by doing what she likes, it would have a reversed psychological effect. That he would stop thinking of her and forget her. Everyday he tries to bury his free time with heaps of engagements. He had been taking up almost every show that Granny Gin had offered him, working himself to the bone, and denying himself any time to think about other things. But his efforts were futile because no matter how hard he tries to shut her out of his thoughts, memories of her just keep creeping back. Failure. In the end, instead of getting her out of his mind, he ended up missing her even more, leaving his heart to ache even more. He longed for her to be by his side.

“Iya, I said I don’t want to come here already,” Wei Lian tried to shove away his emotions as he waited patiently for his regular cab driver to pull up at the taxi stand. He just wanted to get out of the place fast. Immediately.

In a matter of minutes, the cab pulled up at the stone pavement leading up to a stretch of beach houses of different structures and sizes. He got out of the cab with swift motion and allowed his legs to do the walking slowly. He was so familiar with the surroundings that he need not use his white cane to help him navigate the way up to his beach house. It’s a few steps away anyway. One, two, three……four…five. He counted the number of steps in his mind quietly and raised his left foot to step onto the heightened pavement to the back gate of his beach house when someone called out to him.

“Hey Kelvin, hey, long time no see!” a guy called out. Stopping in his tracks, he turned his head to the direction of the voice. It was the shop owner of the rings and gifts accessories shop opposite his back gate. He can still recognize his voice, even though they only met a few times.

“Ya lor, I recently busy mah, so never come lor.” He said it matter-of-factly as he tapped his way into the shop with his white cane. He decided to visit the shop since he had nothing to do anyway. The last time he talked to this guy was when Fang Qi disturbed his peace. He had walked out in a fit of anger to the shop to buy a bottle of cold drink to cool himself down. He clearly remembered her turning the TV set volume so high that it disturbed his song writing process and she had stubbornly refused to adhere to the rules he set for her.

“What. What?? This kind of rock music is supposed to turn the volume up then shiok one what!” She had refuted his demands to switch off the TV set then.

“You better turn down the TV volume now. You go out and smoke la! Or you go to the beach and swim la!” He retaliated and tried to chase her out of the house. The further the better. And the later she comes back the better. Whenever he had the inspiration to work on his music, she is sure to disturb him. His inspiration is running high now, she better don’t come stay in the house and disrupt his thoughts.

“I don’t want lay. No mood to smoke now lay.” She refuses to budge a single bit.

“Your favorite activity what! Go la! Not anytime also can one meh? Smoke la. This one anytime also can one what.” He screamed at her at the top of his voice.

Unreasonable woman. Such a nuisance She is just bent on disturbing him. Eventually, it was him who walked out with his guitar.

“Where’s the girl who is always with you?” The guy asked, offering him a cold drink from the refrigerator.

Girl? Cherie? Or….Fang Qi?

“The girl with shoulder-length hair, the one who talks with a loud voice.” The guy described.

Oh. Cherie has long hair and she doesn’t talk as loud as Fang Qi in public. “Orh, why?” He replied.

“Oh, it’s like this. She bought a ring from me some time back. Already paid but she never came to collect it.”

“She didn’t tell me if she wants to engrave anything on the ring or not. I was telling her about engraving a name or some initials. All the while, she was staring blankly at the ring and then she paid for it and left without saying a word.” The guy continued, explaining to Wei Lian that they provided free engraving services to all their customers.

He recalled that day when Fang Qi came by his shop. She was actually just looking blankly around when her gaze just fell upon this ring in the showcase. “I could see that she loved it at first sight as she immediately requested to have a look at it.”

Feeling the ring that the guy had placed in his hands, Wei Lian suddenly requested, “Erm, you were saying you can engrave name right? You help me engrave the name Fang Qi on the inner side of the ring can or not?” Out of the blue, the words just came out from his mouth before he could think. Eh. Iya, what is he doing? Engrave name on her ring? This is the first time he did such a thing. Somehow, he felt awkward. He felt his cheeks flush.

“No problem! Eh, are you rushing for time? You want to come back in an hour’s time? I can do it for you now.”

“Ok la, I very free now, can sit here and wait for you to finish.” Wei Lian quipped and made himself comfortable on the high chair that the guy had offered.

The guy noticed his awkward look and his mumbling. He took the ring back from him and laughed. “Iya Kelvin, your first time doing such a romantic thing for a girl is it? This kind of thing is very normal la. Don’t shy la.”

“Huh. What romantic thing? Like that consider romantic meh? I where got time to do romantic things? Wait for her to decide, might as well I decide for her. I decide for her faster la.” He denied defensively. But almost immediately, he regretted and wanted to kick himself for saying so. He knew what was wrong. He sounded too defensive.

The guy gave a knowing smile as he proceeded to prepare the tools needed for the name engraving. It is after lunch-time now, so the crowd is slowly dispersing. As the guy started to work on the engraving, he chatted with Wei Lian at the same time.

“You want your name also?” he asked while concentrating.

“Huh? No need la, just her name enough.”

“She is your girlfriend right?”

“Ya ya, my self-proclaimed girlfriend!” Just the thought of it made him want to laugh out loud. Wei Lian started reminiscing about the memories of the beach house days. That woman. Since when did he agree to let her remain as his girlfriend? They were only acting for Ah Ma and she actually use it as one of her frequent retorts too. “You my boyfriend mah. Of course you do for me la.”

“She is a joker la, gamble, talk loud loud, for nothing go around kicking and hitting people. So many bad habits, then hog the toilet for don’t know how long. Sometimes she just bathe only can take up to two hours! No matter how I shout for her to get out, she will just continue and start singing away. I always scold her, so rough, where got people will like her, then she will go like, “I ya, I like cannot meh, I so cute sure got people will like one…” Wei Lian continues in his usual fast talking speed. It was like he was pouring out all his grudges and complaints about Fang Qi. But yet the feeling was so sweet that he did not realize he has been smiling all the way as he spoke of her.

“I ya I’m so cute, you cannot resist me la.” Fang Qi’s words rang in his mind.

“That girl ah, she really have the weirdest ideas. You know how she pours out the chili sauce that refuses to come out or not? Haha!”

With a swift of an action, Wei Lian mimicked Fang Qi’s “brilliant” way of getting the chili sauce out of the chili bottle and articulated his motion with the bottle of cold drink that the guy had offered him. “The sauce cannot come out, she can straightaway crash the bottle against the table edge, to break the bottle neck. Iyo, think only she will do such a thing lor.”

“Eh. Irritating la. Why the chili sauce doesn’t come out? Then how I eat my fried eggs??” She had glared at the bottle of chili sauce angrily and complained in her loud voice.

“This bottle is new la. You got to……..” Wei Lian’s voice trailed off from the sudden shock he got when he heard a loud crash and bits of glasses cracking apart. He didn’t dare to imagine what she had just done but, she really just did it.

“Iya like that la, can liao lor. So easy. Ya, what you want to say?” She poured out the top part of the chili sauce to check if any broken glass has gone in. Iya. Discard this part la. She used her metal spoon to scoop off the chili sauce she poured out. The most bite the glass lor and her mouth bleed lor. She cannot live without chili sauce. She is a chili addict.

“Nothing la. I where dare to say anything?” Wei Lian shook his head and refused the chili sauce she offered.

“You scared got glass ah? Thought you love chili in your food also? Please la, I already pour away the top liao la. Even if got, eat already also won’t die one la.” She raised her voice at him.

Really noisy la, this woman. “I don’t want chili sauce on my fried eggs. Iya, I don’t want la. You eat yourself la.” She must be joking. I already cannot see liao. She broke the chili bottle like that, who will dare to eat? If he is fortunate, he would escape unscathed from the glass bits that might have possibly gone into the chili sauce. If he is unlucky, she might even play a prank on him and put some glass bits into the chili sauce and his mouth would bleed! Wei Lian chuckled in his mind, “Haha, don’t think she will be that evil to me la…”

“And she is one lazy bum loh, eat canned fruit out of the can itself, after eating, some more can just leave it there and wait for me to clean up. When drinking from the straw, she can slurp her drink until few blocks away also can hear you know! Confirm she does it purposely one la, because she knows I hate it when people disturb my thoughts. She just trying to irritate me lor, I know her la.” He recalled her different methods of irritating him.

“She can really do the most unexpected.” Recalling the many times Fang Qi had out of nowhere pounced on him to hug and kiss him, catching him unaware, Wei Lian broke into a bashful smile.

“Ok, done” the guy passed to him the ring engraved with Fang Qi’s name on it.

Before he knew it, he had talked non-stop for about an hour while relating to the guy about Fang Qi. This is the first time he had ever talked so openly and naturally about Fang Qi to an outsider. He was alarmingly surprised at himself too. But he felt much better. Really.

For the past few months, he had been trying hard not to think of her, let alone talk about her. He thought that could work and maybe she would slowly fade away from his memory. But he had been feeling miserable deep inside. Especially so, when the night falls and silence engulfs, when he is about to retire to sleep, those were trying times.

How many times he had forced himself to close his eyes to sleep when his mind wandered to Fang Qi. He clearly misses her. A great deal. He did not know that by bringing down that barrier in his heart and talking about her openly and freely as his emotions could bring him, he really loosened up. His heart felt lighter. He knew that by talking about her, he had already unwittingly accepted her in his heart. He is ready to face his feelings.

Holding the ring close to him, Wei Lian carefully slipped it into his bag. Eh, cannot. His bag was full of things, what if the ring got lost or dropped out of his bag? He hesitated for a second, and slipped the ring onto his last finger. It was too small to fit but he was afraid he will drop it accidentally. He lifted his hands behind his neck and started to fiddle with the clasp of the chain he was wearing. He removed the chain, carefully removed the ring from his finger and strung it through and wore the chain back. That was the best way to keep the ring for her, he thought. Until I find her.

“Ahhh, now I remember!” the shop owner suddenly exclaimed. “I remember I’d sketched a drawing of her on that day. “She looked very sad that day and was adamant on letting me draw her portrait.”

The guy clearly could not forget Fang Qi’s sad expression then, bitter and so resigned. “Why you look so sad?” Fang Qi just shrugged her shoulders without answering him.

Wei Lian played with his hand phone as he listened to the guy. His fingers traced over the shape of the hand phone, feeling its titanium casing. Suddenly a gruff male voice from the speech reader said with a fast speed, “Gallery.” His finger had accidentally hit the “Gallery” button. Suddenly as if thinking of something, he quickly accessed the gallery function and pressed down the “Next” button until he came to a certain picture. “I am Fang Qi.” The gruff voice read again.

Fang Qi had grabbed his handphone without his permission and snapped her own picture with it. “Hahaha! Now my picture will follow you wherever you go and haunt you! You cannot escape from my clutches liao!” She had teased him.

Wei Lian held up his handphone and showed the guy the picture displayed on his handphone screen. “Is she smiling or frowning?” He asked.

“Smiling.” The guy peered at the photo on the screen.

Hearing what he said, Wei Lian quipped. “I will bring her back and let you sketch her again when she is happy. “ That is a promise. He definitely will. Wei Lian smiled and assured the guy. But when will that be? He didn’t have the answer. He doesn’t even know if he is ever able to find her. He knows her inside out. If she wants to hide deliberately, no one will be able to find her. Even Fang Tong did not know her whereabouts. He tried calling Ah Ma. But she said that Fang Qi hasn’t come by. He really had no idea where she was. Hai! He could only wait.

“Ah! This reminds me of something. Then as I sketched her, I realized I first met her a few years back when she came by the shop. Ahhh…I had a deep impression of her because of the song Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge”. The guy tapped his fingers on the glass showcase under his fingers and sighed.

Wei Lian’s heart almost missed a beat upon hearing the mention of this song. That was Fang Qi’s handphone ringtone.

“She was really crying sadly then, while listening to the song. The song just happened to be played on radio and there she was, standing in the middle of the shop with tears trickling down her face. Anyone who looked at her then would have wanted to go up to her and give her a hug or a pat on the shoulder. Hai! What a small world. Got at least four years plus I think. Yeah, I think it’s about the same time you bought over the beach house from Uncle Jimmy and started coming here frequently.” The guy related and counting in his mind how many years ago was that.

“Four years?” Wasn’t that about the same timing when Jake left Singapore without explaining why? A lot of things happened four years ago. Cherie and Jake had left suddenly. Then……suddenly he felt the unexplainable closeness he felt with Fang Qi surging back. Same time as he bought the beach house? Maybe I might have even walked past her then….

His mind started to go into a whirl again. Lately he had been thinking of so many things that his thoughts have become jumbled. Confused.

All of a sudden, memories of a short brush with the irritating girl on the streets came running back into his mind.

“Can you sing “Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge?”

“Can you?”

“Why are you acting so aloof? Don’t you know it’s rude not to look at people when someone is talking to you? Unless you tell me you are blind.”

“I’m sorry, but can you please sing that song for me? Please?”

The similarity is uncanny… don’t tell me it’s…

So she was that irritating girl who had begged him on the streets, not less than once, to sing the song. That was four years ago, he remembered. That day, he was feeling upset and fidgety over Cherie and Jason’s date when he met this girl. The pieces suddenly seem to fall into place. Have their fates been linked to each other since then?

His lips curling into a smile, he thought… silly girl.

Author's Note

2006-03-02T01:52:00.000-08:00

Author's Note

Hello Hello everybody,

Early morning log on and I saw many new comments lay! Made a decision today. As many of you would have discovered, we changed songs accordingly to the kind of feel we want to bring across to the readers every few chapters. Thus, we shall go against tradition today and introduce a new song to put across what is coming up in the coming chapter. Just a special edition, do log on to hear it okay? We won’t be putting up this song for long. After all, it’s a Wei Lian fanfic mah! How can we do without his songs lay? Don’t miss it okay...

Song Title: Ni Na Me Ai Ta (You Love Her So Much)
By: Li Sheng Jie & Lin Long Xuan

Cheers from

I Love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong? Team

Chapter 26

2006-03-02T00:36:00.000-08:00

“Ka Fei Ma Zui Bu Liao Gu Dan, Que Hui Rang Ye Geng Chang...”

Chapter 26

Wei Lian had been walking aimlessly for the past half an hour after Cherie left. His mind was a blank, his heart was a mess. He no longer knew what to think or what not to think anymore. He has always been very steady about such things. He never let such things bother him as much as this. He always knew when to let go, when to stop bothering. Somehow, this time, he has failed. Failed badly.

As he strolled on, he realized that he had wandered into a familiar park. He recognized the musky smell of the shady trees and the sweet smelling flowers at the park. He hadn’t been here for a long time but he will never forget this place, which brought back many happy memories.

The three of them often hung out here during their school days. Those were the days where they were all young and free from worries. Things were so much simpler then.

"Wei Lian, if you are not married by 30 years old and nobody wants me still, will you marry me or not?" Cherie asked when they were 18.

"You where will no one want la? Worry for what?" Wei Lian had replied her that.

"Wei Lian, Jason bullied me!!!" “Ok ok, I beat him. Jason!!!”

"Wei Lian, someone is hiding behind the bushes, I scared." Cherie said. Wei Lian hugged her protectively.

"Wei Lian....I want your cup of ice cream" Cherie pleaded in her sweetest voice. He gave it to her. “Greedy girl la you!”

A smile broke out on Wei Lian’s face as he recalled all the fun times they shared when they were younger. If only they could turn back the clock. If only… Just as he settled himself down on one of the benches, he heard voices talking. He cocked his head and listened intently to see if there were people near him. His heart froze when he heard two familiar voices. Cherie and Jason.

They were sitting on a bench behind Wei Lian, separated by a low garden wall. Cherie had called Jason and asked to meet him shortly after she left Wei Lian at the mall. The uncertainty was eating her up inside and she couldn’t stand it anymore. She needed some answers. If not, she was going to go crazy.

“Jason, I really don’t want to play any more games. We are old enough to speak our minds.” Cherie spoke with resolve. “So are you in love with Fang Qi? Or me?” She didn’t mince her words at all.

Jason was stunned speechless momentarily by Cherie’s directness. He had intended to confess his feelings for her at Café Mocha Love that day. But Cherie had appeared so indifferent towards him and seemed so distracted while talking to him that he had chickened out. He felt that his presence didn’t mean anything to her. So he swallowed all this words. Now, he can’t believe his ears as Cherie asked if he loved her. He opened his mouth but no words came out. His eyes displayed pain as he looked at her. He reached for her hands and held them tight, and managed only one word. “You.”

“Then why that day at the café you didn’t say so? Why did you ask me out and then leave without a word?? Why you torture me when you love me??” Cherie lost control and screamed at him, bursting into tears. Jason heart ached upon seeing Cherie cry and he moved close to her and wrapped his arms around her tightly. Cherie struggled to get out of his hug but Jason wasn’t going to let go. He just wanted to hold her in his arms to protect her and make her happy forever. Cherie relented as Jason hugged her tighter and she collapsed onto him totally. She was already weak with crying.

“Ssshhh, silly girl. Don’t cry already. I…I didn’t tell you how I felt at the café that day because I thought you and Wei Lian… were together. I was afraid and lost.” Jason explained slowly. “And I was nice to Fang Qi because I wanted to help her abit la, but also for selfish reasons lor. I wanted to see if I could evoke any reaction from you.” He continued sheepishly. “ But when you didn’t show any reaction, I thought that was it for me lor.” “Cherie, I’m really sorry. “ With that, Jason planted a kiss on her forehead and Cherie hugged him tightly round the waist.

The world suddenly spun like no tomorrow. Wei Lian sat numbly on the bench, his heart wrenched up in the deadliest of knots. He knew this day will come. That Cherie and Jason will finally get together. He had expected such an ending. But didn’t know it would come so soon. All these while, he had still been harbouring hopes with Cherie. Many times he had scolded himself for being silly, but he continued to love Cherie with all his heart. Now he knew his feelings had to come to an end. Wasn’t he the one who always said that as long as she is happy, he would be happy? Tears streamed furiously down his face as he thought to himself, “Tan Wei Lian, it’s time you faced up to reality…”

As the hurt numbed his senses and he fell deep in thoughts, he didn’t realize that Jason and Cherie had left. He also didn’t realize that someone was standing next to him, looking at him with a concerned yet pained expression. Fang Qi heart ached for Wei Lian. She has never seen him in such a state before. He had always put up a strong front, always appearing indifferent to the happenings around him. But now….His tears tore her heart apart.

After leaving Cherie and Wei Lian at the shopping mall, Jason had asked to be left alone for awhile. Fang Qi knew that he was upset seeing Wei Lian and Cherie together. Afraid that he would do something silly, she had followed him around secretly, until he came to this park. Then she realised he was here to meet Cherie. And her heart dropped when she caught sight of Wei Lian sitting on the bench just behind them. She didn’t know what to do so she just stood there and waited.

All Fang Qi wanted to do now was to go over and hug Wei Lian. She had been quietly watching him cry for five minutes. He never once wiped his tears away. The resigned and desolate look on his face made her heart ache so much that she started to tear. As she shifted her feet to move closer, Wei Lian suddenly heard her presence and asked, “Who’s that?”

Fang Qi dared not speak. She didn’t know what to say. She knew she might make matters worse with the way she talked. She just wanted to be around to offer some moral support. She was contented to just stay quietly by his side.

Wei Lian knew it was Fang Qi. Somehow, he could just sense it. What is she doing here? To spy on me? To see me in this sorry state? Weird thoughts ran through his mind rapidly. He could feel his anger rising. The emotions running around in his head took over him and he lost control of himself.

“What are you doing here?! Just go la! Don’t stand here and look at me la!” He raised his voice. Hearing no response, he got up from the bench, grabbed his bag and white cane and started to walk away. “I tell you ah, you better don’t follow me ah! Don’t come and irritate me!” Wei Lian couldn’t help but vent all his anger on Fang Qi. There was no one else around to be his punching bag. Except her.

Fang Qi kept quiet and slowly followed behind Wei Lian. No, she was not going to let him leave alone. She was worried for him.

“I already said, don’t follow me! You don’t understand issit?” Wei Lian flared up, his voice as loud as anything, shrieking and trembling with immense anger in the middle of the silent cold night.

“I….I just want to see if you are ok….” Fang Qi finally said meekly, stunned by Wei Lian’s sudden outburst. She had seen him flare up before and each time he flares up, she would retaliate. While in the past, when they squabbled, the most common reaction from him is anger. But this time round, it’s not only anger. She knows it’s more than that. She could feel the extreme hurt and despair from his reactions. She could feel it very strongly. Suddenly, it frightens her. She had never felt like this before…except when Jake left her. But coming from Wei Lian, the sudden feeling she felt from him seems to be more….more than anything….

“What’s there to see? Hah? What do you know? You think you who ah? You know what I’m thinking meh? You think you know everything issit? You don’t know ok!! Why are you following me ha? You can leave me alone or not? Why must you appear in front of us?? If you didn’t appear, everything will be just fine!!! Why? What you want!! Just go away! Go! Just go!” Wei Lian screamed at Fang Qi with all his might. He no longer knew what the hell he was doing or saying. All he wanted to do at that moment was to shout. Shout with all his might. He didn’t care what he was screaming and whether his words made sense. He just wanted to shout and scream. Anything that came to his mind. Anything.

As he stood in the middle of the park wrenching his angry fists, his tears flowed uncontrollably. For a long while, he just stood there quietly in the cold piercing wind. From tears he never once bothered to raise his hand to brush off, to uncontrollable sobs and till he could cry no more. He never once said a word more. He kept silent as the cold wind dried his tear-stained face…

All he could hear was the silence of the park and his sobs. Then…he only knew seconds later that he had managed to chase Fang Qi away. Hurt by Wei Lian sharp words that cut like a knife, Fang Qi had picked up what was left of her shattered heart and ran out of the park in tears. Without him realizing it.

Four months later….

Wei Lian sat at the makeshift dining table, facing the television set. He held the TV remote control and began switching channels on the television set. Channel after channel, all he could hear was the “Sa…sa….sa” noise coming from the television set. Nothing on TV tonight.

How ironic? It’s a Saturday and there is not even an interesting program or movie tonight. He is so sick of variety shows that he automatically skips the variety shows channels. Music channels? Not interested at all. His attention span kept getting diverted after a few seconds. Finally, he heaved a sigh and chucked the remote control back into the remote controls holder after turning off the TV.

Ever since that night, he hasn’t seen or heard from Fang Qi again. He heard from Jason and Cherie that she had left Singapore in a hurry. Maybe she went to visit Ah Ma. Who knows? He tried to console himself by cooking up an excuse for himself. She doesn’t know my pattern meh? A little bit and she got angry meh? He chided quietly in his heart umpteen times whenever he thought of that night. But each time he recalled the scene of him hurling hurtful words at her, trying to chase her away, a sense of guilt would overwhelm him. He knew deep inside his heart, he felt bad about venting his frustration on her that night. He tried cooling himself down by hiding in the beach house for a few days. But by the time he wanted to call her, she had already left. Left even before he had a chance to apologize to her.

Four months. He had already gotten used to the fact that Cherie and Jason are a couple now. Now that they are finally together, he could finally let go of his feelings for Cherie. That windy night, the few days of locking himself inside the beach house and hiding under his blankets, the constant crying, had actually awakened him on many things. It was a very difficult task to get over Cherie, no doubt. After all, she was the first girl he had loved since young. Letting go was hard, but he knew he had to do it. Knowing that Cherie is happy to be with Jason, and that Jason dotes on her like anything, he felt happy for them. He knew he has moved on to another level.

Suddenly, the whistling kettle sounded. He walked to the kitchen and felt for his cup and the container of coffee powder mix. He reached into the container and took out two packets of coffee powder mix and tore them open. With swift and familiar motion, he wrapped a piece of cloth over the hot handle of the kettle and started to pour water into the mug containing a heap of coffee powder. He liked his coffee thick. Even though it was already 1am in the morning, he had to have his dose of coffee.

Ever since the night when Jason and Cherie got together, and Fang Qi left, he had been having sleepless nights. Initially, he had thought that he could not get over the fact the Cherie had chosen Jason over him. But gradually, he came to realise the reason he couldn’t sleep well. He stirred the coffee lightly and carefully held the hot mug in his hand and took a little sip of the coffee. Hmm..thick and bitter. The first taste of bitterness of the coffee describes perfectly well how he felt now. He didn’t bother to add any sugar. Not that he doesn’t like sugar in his coffee. Somehow, he just resists the idea of adding any to it. The corners of his lips curled a little as thoughts ran through his mind. She……drinks her coffee without sugar.

For endless nights, he made himself some coffee in hope of chasing the restlessness within him away. Although he knew that coffee might keep him even more awake, at least it somehow calms his restlessness in the still of the night.

He never used to like coffee until Fang Qi came along and barged into his beach house. When Fang Qi was still staying at the beach house, she had to have at least two cups of coffee everyday. She was almost a coffee addict. She loves her coffee thick and so, she would often tear two packets of the coffee powder mix each time. She had made him stock up boxes of her favourite coffee powder mix. Sometimes when she was in a good mood, she would even serve him coffee. Because of her big craving for coffee, each time the coffee runs out, he would be ordered by Fang Qi to replenish the stock. Soon it became a habit and he would automatically stock up on coffee if he realized that the supply was running low.

As he reached out for the container to close the lid, he realized that there was only one packet of coffee powder mix left. Suddenly a weird feeling of sadness swept over him. It was as if he was witnessing something come to an end. The whole house was so quiet it felt empty. Lonely. Every night, this feeling will surface as he sipped on his coffee. The sense of hollowness within him became a frequent visitor. It was like a puzzle with a missing piece. Fang Qi’s voice would then emerge in his head, scolding him, bickering with him. Tonight, he felt all this again, and more. The feeling is so strong that it is indescribable. All of a sudden, he realized something. Something that he had been trying very hard to conceal or push out of his mind. He missed Fang Qi. A lot. And he could no longer deny it.

Tomorrow. He will go and buy more coffee powder mix tomorrow.

Chapter 25

2006-03-02T00:32:00.000-08:00

“Jiu Jing Shen Me Jiao Yong Qi? Shi Wei Xiao Zhe Rang Ni Li Kai, Hai Shi Ku Zhe Ba Ni Liu Xia?”

Chapter 25

Cherie held up a green T-shirt against Wei Lian, trying to see if the colour suits him. But she really wasn’t focusing on the T-shirt nor Wei Lian. Her mind had wandered far away. Why was Jason so nice to Fang Qi? Why were they even together in the first place? Where have they gone?

Wei Lian stood still as Cherie fiddled with the T-shirt. Beneath his seemingly calm exterior, his mind was in overdrive, replaying the scene where they were almost knocked over earlier. He couldn’t explain to himself why his instinct was to reach out for Fang Qi and not Cherie who was just next to him, holding on to him. And that moment of closeness had brought a surge of warmth into this heart. He had no explanation for that either. It was bothering him. He hates it when he himself doesn’t know what to think anymore.

“Ouch! Iyo, you want to kill me issit?” Wei Lian exclaimed jokingly as he was jolted out of his stance when Cherie accidentally jabbed the T-shirt hanger into his left cheek. “Oh! Sorry sorry!” Cherie apologized profusely and reached out to rub Wei Lian’s cheek. “Haha I can’t bear to kill you one la!” she laughed. Wei Lian grinned at her. Cherie can be so clumsy and cute sometimes.

Rubbing Wei Lian’s cheek that she had “injured”, the scene of Jason wiping Fang Qi’s mouth flashed across her mind. Jealousy crept into her heart. Hmm, maybe Wei Lian knows something? Should she ask him? “Fang Qi and Jason together not bad what hor?” The question came out all wrong.

Wei Lian was spaced out again. Huh? "What?" He cocked his head and raised his eyebrows.

Cherie repeated her words a little louder. "I said, Jason and Fang Qi look good together!" Her voice bordered on jealousy and annoyance.

"Is it? Okay la." Wei Lian trailed off. He really doesn’t know what to say or how he should answer her. As sensitive as he is, he caught a strong hint of jealousy in Cherie’s tone. He has never heard this kind of jealousy from Cherie before. But the tone rang a bell in his head. “Wah, you finally back from your hot date ah?” But then that was a different kind of feeling altogether, he quickly refuted inside him. He knew Fang Qi was just trying to irritate and spite him. All the time.

A strong uncomfortable feeling churns inside him but he couldn’t quite make out what it exactly represents. All along he has been clear on what he wants or thinks. Yes means yes, and he will go ahead and do it. No means no, he wouldn’t waste his time over something not worth bothering about. That is him. But now, he is becoming more and more unlike him. He can’t accept this kind of weird nagging feelings that keep threatening to spill out. Feelings that invade his life without him even realising. Feelings, which make him act differently from how he thinks. The fear of losing control of his feelings terrifies him somehow.

“Ya what, they looked pretty good together mah. Some more now Fang Qi looks much better after the makeover.” This time Cherie sounded even more jealous. She looked up at Wei Lian and directed all her jealousy of Jason and Fang Qi on Wei Lian.

“Okay la." Wei Lian said again. He was still listening to Cherie. He looks away, trying hard to suppress the bitterness within him. He is not a fool. Anyone would have caught the jealousy in Cherie’s words. He could tell Cherie’s jealousy from the way she talked. He knows she is trying to see if he knew anything. But what can he tell her? How to tell her anything? Everything suddenly became unexplainable. He bit his lip, an urge of walking away and hiding from the crowd surged within him. He too was wondering how on earth Jason and Fang Qi ended up together.

Jason and Fang Qi. The thought of hearing their names together made him uncomfortable somehow. He knew Jason couldn’t stand Fang Qi’s unwomanly and rough demeanor. So why the sudden interest in giving her a new image now?

He tried to make an answer out of it. He swears that given Fang Qi’s character, it was easy for him to know the girl inside out. She would flare up and kick up a fuss and bite the head off anyone who attempts to sway her decision. In short, if she doesn’t want to do something, no one can force her. How come Jason can manage to change her image? He wanted so much to dial her number and ask her. His fingers attempted to stray over the side pocket of his jeans silently. For his handphone.

Wait! Then he quickly withdrew his hand and instead raises it up to scratch his face with much awkwardness. He couldn’t see, so he wasn’t sure if he had accidentally revealed his thoughts through his actions and facial expressions. What is he doing lor? Hopefully Cherie didn’t catch his odd behaviour. He realized he has been staring out into space too often in front of Cherie. That was certainly not what he wanted.

"Hmm, after all Fang Qi was saved by Jason when she had gastric and hospitalized the other time mah....if they’re together, not surprising also hor?" Cherie was half sarcastic, half digging, wondering if Wei Lian knew anything.

“Okay lor." Came Wei Lian’s stoic reply.

"Why you keep saying okay okay okay??!” Cherie couldn’t take his meaningless replies and raised her voice. Her voice brimmed with frustration. She couldn’t get the scene of Jason reaching out and shielding her from the rowdy teenagers out of her mind. She knew she was clearly disturbed by his reaction. To quell her jealousy, she tried talking to Wei Lian. But then again, every word and sentence came out the wrong way. She was already troubled enough and all he could give were his favourite one-word answers.

"Iya, how I know la, I also don’t know how they look like. You say look good look good lor." Wei Lian’s answer dripped with sarcasm and bitterness. Almost immediately, he regretted snapping at Cherie. What has gotten into him? He wanted to apologize but…iya never mind la. A bit lazy and a bit….

The nagging feeling inside him held him back from saying another word. He decided that he wasn’t in the mood to do anything now. Not even talking. He just feels like finding something to kick. He cannot describe how he feels, but then again, decides that kicking things is out of his list.

Then…Cherie realized she had tested Wei Lian’s patience a little too far. He seldom talked to her in this manner. Not even when she snapped back at him when he is in a bad mood. But today….She looked at his gloomy face and pushed her thoughts of Jason behind her. What’s wrong with him also? Today is bad mood day issit? Hai! Better cheer him up a bit first.

“Hey this T-shirt is nice!” Cherie resumed her chirpy voice and took a light pink T-shirt off the display rack. She started to measure the T-shirt against Wei Lian’s shoulders to see if it fits. He obediently stood still and let Cherie fuss over him. Cherie was asking him if he liked the feel of the material and whether it felt comfortable. But all he could hear in his head was Fang Qi asking him “Can anot?? Issit too tight? The collar too high anot?” and then Fang Qi turning him around roughly to scrutinize the clothes he was trying.

Fang Qi had gone shopping for clothes with him before when he needed new clothes for a major performance at Granny Gin’s hotel. That was before Cherie came back and he had no choice but to get Fang Qi’s help as Jason was busy then. He didn’t know if he could trust her taste, but oh well, better than nothing la. He remembered them creating quite a scene at the men’s department.

“Eh! You can don’t anyhow touch me anot?” Wei Lian brushes off the hands with irritation. Fang Qi was meddling with the left sleeve of the shirt that she made him try on. Her hands were tugging the shirt so roughly that she accidentally scratched his chest with her fingernails.

“Iya, this size can la, why must you keep measuring?” Wei Lian’s irritated voice sounded again. Hearing no reply from her, Wei Lian asked again impatiently. “Eh! This size can la. Big a bit okay la! Oei, I talking to you.” He tried to listen for a response before he realized that he was talking to the air. Fang Qi had already shifted to his right side and continued to tug at his shirt.

“Wait la! This material wash liao also don’t know will shrink or not. Buy this size if shrink then you wear liao look like dumpling la. If buy bigger then never shrink, you will look like wearing pyjamas you know??” Fang Qi shrieked.

“Iyo, you very troublesome, buy one shirt also must think so much. The most I don’t wash la, then won’t shrink lor.” He had gotten a big stinging slap on his arm for rebutting her with that. The thought of their bickering made him want to laugh out loud. Such a barbaric girl.

Huh? What is this?? Why is this silly barbaric girl invading my mind? Wei Lian suddenly snapped out of his thoughts. “Erm? Can wear la.” He quickly replied before Cherie noticed that he is not concentrating again.

Cherie held onto Wei Lian’s arm and walked side by side with him with silence after they left the departmental store. “Ouch!!” The guy beside her shifted in uncontrollable pain as he banged his face into the wall. Cherie let loose her arm and looked up to realize that she has been walking too closely to the wall and now she had caused Wei Lian to bang his head straight into the wall. She cupped her other hand over her mouth and gasped. What the hell is she doing? She had actually forgotten that she is holding on to Wei Lian who is depending on her to lead the way in front. She crackled awkwardly and apologetically. “Eh sorry leh, sorry. I was…I didn’t realize I was walking too close to the wall…” She quickly reached out both hands and rubbed the slightly bruised area on his right forehead.

Wei Lian slumped against the brass railing of the glass panel behind him and allowed Cherie to take a closer look of his bruise. “How? Pain or not? Sorry leh.” Cherie’s voice softened with guilt. Wei Lian shook his head and gave a weak smile. “Ok la. Not very pain la. But you can don’t bring me too near the wall again or not? The wall very hard lay.” He muttered grudgingly. “Orh.” Came Cherie’s reply.

Ten minutes later. Cherie hooked her arm onto Wei Lian’s arm again and wandered aimlessly around the shopping mall. They stopped in front of a jewelry shop. Cherie dragged Wei Lian closer to the display windows and took a closer look. She was staring at the square-shaped pendant with little diamonds set on its silvery pendant plate surface to form the alphabet “C”. The slim fingers on her free hand played with the pendant she was wearing on her neck. It was exactly the same as the one in the shop display window.

Wei Lian felt the unusual quietness in her. He needn’t ask or probe. After all they have been buddies since they were young. And he knew where exactly they were standing. He had accompanied her on many occasions as she peered into the window display to awe at the exquisite pendants.

He listened to the ultra soft clanking of the silver necklace against her pendant as they rubbed against each other with friction. He smiled softly, his eyes slightly revealing a look of bitter pain in them. That has been Jason’s gift to Cherie on her 19th birthday. But what Cherie did not know was that Wei Lian was the one who came and selected the gift. Jason’s original gift was a crystal guitar key chain. But Cherie has been eyeing the necklace. Without a word, he thrust the present he prepared into Jason’s hand and took over Jason’s gift as his own.

“Iya, okay la, let’s go…” Cherie nudged him with her arm. Wei Lian followed her silently, his head facing away from Cherie’s as they wandered down the corridor of the other shops.

Finally after five minutes, Cherie came to an abrupt stop. “Wei Lian….I, …….” She hesitated for a while, but still, no words came to her mouth.

Wei Lian stopped in his tracks with her and wriggled his arm out of Cherie’s. “I ya, go la. I know la.” He felt for the bag of clothes he bought and took them over from her and gave her a slight push. How can he possibly not know how restless Cherie had been feeling for the past one-hour or so? He kept his face straight and urged her to go, his face refusing to reveal any emotions.

Looking at Wei Lian’s expressionless face and usual nonchalant attitude, Cherie’s lips broke into a wide smile. Wei Lian knew. He always knew how she felt without her saying too much. “Hey, love you okay.” She stepped forward and gave him a tight hug to show her appreciation to him for his understanding. She quickly planted a peck on his cheek and pulled away. Her hands still on his arms, she gave them a squeeze before she turned to leave.

Wei Lian heard her footsteps drifting further and further away from him. Till he could not hear them anymore. He felt terribly upset inside him. He remained in his stoned posture for what seems like five minutes in the middle of the spacious shopping mall. Her “love you okay” made him feel even worse.

He could feel the warmth of the sunrays shining in through the mall’s glass roof panels dancing on him. But deep within his heart, he could not feel any sign of warmth anymore. All he could feel was his heart wrenching into a tight knot. The feeling was so suffocating that his senses became numb. He could no longer feel anything. Only a strange kind of coldness overwhelmed his body and hit him in his heart. He does not know what kind of coldness is that. It is a familiar kind of coldness. As if something is gone. The kind he had experienced when he was rescued up from his fall into the swimming pool at the hotel. But only this time, the feeling wasn’t as strong. Suddenly, he felt as if he was being sucked into a deep dark bottomless pit. Suddenly, the crowd in the spacious shopping mall seemed to fade rapidly into the background, as if he was the only one left standing there. All by himself.

Chapter 24

2006-02-28T22:09:00.000-08:00

“Wo De Wu Suo Wei Dou Shi Xu Wei... Li Kai You Shi Hou Shi Yin Wei Wo Tai Guo Zi Bei... Hai Pa Cheng Ren Wo Shi Na Me Ai Ni De Yi Qie...”

Chapter 24

Wei Lian stepped back quickly as somebody almost bumped into him. For a split second, a strong feeling of familiarity overcame him. That bizarre feeling that he felt when he was struggling in the pool surfaced again. Fang Qi? It was her right? What’s she doing here?

“Eh, me la.” Fang Qi cleared the awkward silence. She was shivering in her wet clothes even though the sun was unbearably hot. She clutched the bracelet tightly in her hand, trying to find the right words to say. “Ah Ma sent this to you.” “Eh. How come you are here?” He was surprised by her sudden appearance. Fang Qi ignored his question and instead, she grabbed his hand and stuffed the bracelet she has just retrieved from the pool into it.

“Huh! What’s this?” Wei Lian asked curiously, feeling the item in his hand. “Oh, it’s a bracelet hah?” Then he tried to single-handedly put the bracelet around his wrist, but it kept slipping off. Fang Qi hesitated but finally offered to help him, “Iya, I do la.” She stood in front of him and started to hook the bracelet clasp together. She accidentally brushed her wet clothes against Wei Lian’s arm.

“How come you are all wet??” Wei Lian asked with genuine concern. “Oh, iya, I felt like swimming but didn’t bring my swimsuit, so I just jumped into the pool la. Sshhh don’t tell people ah!” Fang Qi tried to lighten the situation. She didn’t want him to know that she had jumped in to retrieve the bracelet, which she threw in frustration last night. Suddenly she didn’t want him to know she was here at all last night. Somehow she thought it didn’t matter anymore. What’s important is he is ok.

Before Wei Lian could probe any further, Fang Qi said hurriedly, “Ok la, I got to go liao. Bye.” Then she rushed out of the hotel without turning back.

Wei Lian was still puzzled by Fang Qi’s strange behaviour. Crazy girl, swim in her clothes? Here? Then suddenly he remembered why he was at the pool. Carefully, he used his white cane to tap around the floor to orientate himself. He wasn’t interested in falling into the pool again. Luckily he always brought along an extra white cane. His old one could not be fixed back after being under the wheels of the trolley last night. Half bended down and feeling around with his hands, he finally found the bench where he had put his bag while enjoying the surroundings last night. Before he was pushed into the pool.

He bent down and felt the seat of the bench, as if looking for something. He crept closer to the floor, and felt the floor with his bare hands. Where was it? He must have dropped it from his bag when he was here last night as he was unable to find it the whole morning.

Then he felt it. With a relieved smile on his face, he picked what he had found up from the floor and started to dust the dirt off it with his other hand. It was the small charity teddy bear that he had bought from Fang Qi.

Jason and Cherie sat in their regular booth in Café Mocha Love, both staring intently at their glasses, stirring their drinks with the straws, in their own thoughts. The ice had already melted fully in the afternoon heat. Jason barely slept a wink last night, as he couldn’t figure out what was happening between Wei Lian and Cherie. Wei Lian had told him that he was the one Cherie loves. But somehow, after Cherie returned to Singapore, she seemed indifferent towards him, and instead seemed closer to Wei Lian.

And now that Jason knew Wei Lian liked Cherie, he was in a dilemma whether to give up or fight for his own happiness. At one point, he did think of giving up and give his blessings to Wei Lian and Cherie, as he knew Wei Lian had always been so protective of Cherie and had kept mum about his feelings for her all these years. And seeing Cherie reciprocating Wei Lian’s care and concern, he thought that Cherie was slowly accepting Wei Lian. He couldn’t help but feel lost and upset.

However, after last night’s incident, he felt even more confused. Although Wei Lian and Cherie never admitted to anything, they behaved like a couple. Are they really one? And Fang Qi’s appearance and behavior at the hotel stumped him as well. Where does this girl fit into the picture then?

The next day, Cherie visited Wei Lian at the beach house. The past weeks spent hanging out with him had made their bond even greater. Although Cherie knew Wei Lian had feelings for her, she tried to ignore that and translated it into brotherly love. She loved Wei Lian as a friend, a brother. He was ever so caring and thoughtful towards her. Not in obvious ways of course. Wei Lian was not one who exhibits his concern openly. But she knew he cared and was grateful to him for being always there for her.

Wei Lian plucked at his guitar strings, looking bored and spaced out again. “Hey, sing me a song lay,” Cherie requested. Instinctively, Wei Lian thought of her song. Chu Mo. The one he had written for her. Immediately, he started singing the song, and the airport scenes four years back started playing in his mind. As he got more and more into the song, suddenly his mind became a complete blank for a split second. Scenes of the recent beach house days flooded his mind. Huh? What’s happening la? He was confused. His voice trailed off as he abruptly stops manipulating the guitar strings.

Seeing his distracted look, Cherie smiled to herself and thought, “Spaced out again. The seventh time since she stepped into the beach house one hour ago.” Rolling her eyes in boredom, she jumped up from her seat and said “Iyo, you sing until bored already la. Let’s go shopping lor?” Wei Lian didn’t budge, still slowly strumming his guitar. Cherie grabbed his arm and ordered, “Come on! Go shopping with me la. I’ll get you some new T-shirts!” Wei Lian got up from his trance and followed Cherie out.

“Iyo you just take a look at yourself!” Jason stared disapprovingly at the girl who was shading the lottery tickets at the café. Her clothes were not ironed, her eye bags threatened to overshadow her usually big round eyes. And she was definitely having a bad hair day.

What kind of hairstyle is that? Not even combed. He stared queerly at her messy chunk of shoulder-length hair. “Can you comb your hair or not ah? Very messy leh.” He complained. The girl looked up at him for a second and then shifted her glance back to the stack of lottery tickets. Suddenly she kicked the table leg. Damn! Too long never buy lottery cannot even remember how to shade the lottery tickets properly!

Jason lifted up his legs just as immediately as he plonked himself down at Fang Qi’s table. Just in case she kicked him accidentally as well. Wah. The hair is atrocious. No make-up. Nothing. Pale-faced. He doesn’t want to sit down in front of a sitting corpse who keeps concentrating on the stack of lottery tickets in front of her. Finally he stood up and announced in a determined manner. ”Ok, I’m bringing you to get new clothes.”

“No need la”, Fang Qi muttered lifelessly without any sign of interest. But before she could protest, Jason had already paid for her drink and was already half pulling and half dragging her towards where he parked his car.

Daysprings Shopping Centre.

“Hey, let’s eat ice-cream!” Cherie got all excited when she saw the Ben and Jerry’s ice-cream booth at the basement of the shopping centre. She grabbed Wei Lian’s hand and walked quickly towards the ice-cream booth. Wei Lian’s hand felt warm and clammy at the same time. The mixed feelings in him are baffling him. He used to feel extremely happy when Cherie held his hand. But now?

“What flavour you want?” Cherie asked as they approached the ice-cream booth.

“Rum and raisin!”

“Rum and raisin!”

Huh? This voice??

“Hey, Fang Qi!” Cherie exclaimed. Huh, so coincidental ah, Wei Lian thought. He didn’t know how to react or whether he should say hi. “Wah, you also like rum and raisin ah? Wei Lian also loves it leh!” Cherie chirped, hooking her arm into his. Fang Qi couldn’t bring herself to utter a word. So he liked this flavour of ice cream too. She just nodded and smiled weakly. Of all people why must I see them?

“Hello bro!” Jason acknowledged Wei Lian. What? Jason was here too? What’s he doing with Fang Qi? Multiple questions ran through his mind. But he could only manage a weak smile and an “Oei.”

“Iyo you ah, just now already eaten one scoop of rum and raisin, now you want to eat another one?” Jason nagged at Fang Qi. “Don’t know what’s so nice about rum and raisin. I think only the two of you know how to appreciate lor.” Jason said, shaking his head. Wei Lian and Fang Qi both kept quiet, their hearts each having a strange feeling. Fang Qi ate her ice cream with her head hung low, staring down at the ice cream while Wei Lian ate his quietly, all the while staring straight ahead into space.

“And you eat until your mouth like that!” Jason quickly took out a piece of tissue to wipe off the ice cream remnants on Fang Qi’s right lip. He cannot understand how can girls not look after their image! She is like a kid! “I ya, I always eat like that. Cannot ah?” Fang Qi cannot stand the way Jason was fussing around her. I don’t like to look after my image cannot ah? I like to be messy cannot ah? She thought grudgingly inside her as she licked the ice cream off the cone.

Cannot ah? I like to be messy cannot ah? Must look after image meh? I like it this way leh! Cannot ah? Fang Qi’s barbaric ways and her usual reactions when reprimanded flashed across his mind as Wei Lian listened to her grudging tone towards Jason. This is her lor. Always so barbaric and unreasonable. Always retorting back at him. But he hasn’t heard this from her for a long time already. He cocked his head uncomfortably as he continued eating his ice cream.

“Why stand here ah?” Fang Qi looked up at Jason who was going to open his mouth to reprimand her again. Standing in front of the ice cream store eating and talking. She doesn’t like la! Don’t ask her why. She just detests that kind of feeling when people stared at them. She caught the ice cream seller casting questioningly looks at them.

"Wah Fang Qi, I like your hairstyle leh. You just dyed it ah?” Cherie marveled at the beautifully layered dark brown shoulder-length hair.

“Neh, you see. I said you looked prettier now right? Better than just now that chunk of bird nest hair. You think you building bird nest for the birds to come and sleep is it?” Jason continued nagging at her. Thinking of that chunk of what resembles a bird nest, he couldn’t help but felt traumatized by it. He had dragged her to the hair salon and requested the stunned hairstylist and make-up stylist to restyle her. Then, he dragged her to his friend’s boutique and asked her to dress her accordingly. In a matter of hours, he was done transforming her into a sweet girl-next-door look. And he is pleased with the results.

“Eh, you don’t touch my hair can anot??” Fang Qi stared at him with her big eyes and hissed.

“Iya please lay, I spent a bomb on your new image, you don’t ruin it can or not? You got see a girl carrying a sweet girl next-door image talk until so rough or not? You don’t move your head la, I am trying to take away the leaf in your hair la!” Jason picked up a tiny leaf from Fang Qi’s hair as she continued to talk in her grudging and impatient tone.

Cherie looked on as Jason and Fang Qi squabbled. Her fingers squeezed Wei Lian’s arm tighter than ever. Huh? Wei Lian, who has not spoken a word since they bumped into one another, was still “staring” into space when he felt Cherie’s sudden squeeze. Cherie always does that when she is upset or angry, he remembered.

Cherie still couldn’t forget Jason. It was obvious. Wei Lian hung his head low as he tried to listen to the on-going conversation and make out the complicated scenario. Tried as hard as he might, his efforts to change and improve Fang Qi had been a futile one compared to Jason’s. But good lor, Jason managed to curb her barbaric ways, not bad what. All of a sudden, he did not know what to feel already. Loss. Emptiness. Thrill? Or relief? Too confusing. Get out. Now.

Wei Lian suddenly shifted away and placed his hand on Cherie’s shoulder, nudging her. He couldn’t tell if it’s him who can no longer bear listening to Jason and Fang Qi’s on-going conversation or was he worried about Cherie not being able to take it any further as she looks on at the intimacy Jason and Fang Qi displayed. “Thought you want to buy clothes?” he muttered.

“Oh ya, almost forgot that…Err…I think…we go off first…” Cherie grabbed hold of Wei Lian’s arm and interrupted Jason and Fang Qi’s conversation.

Going off? Fang Qi turned away from Jason and looked up at Wei Lian. He was still as nonchalant. Fang Qi’s lips broke into a thin line, forcing herself to smile. But it became an awkward smile instead. She forced herself to look away. He wasn’t the least bit curious why she was with Jason. Ever since Cherie came back, he no longer squabbled with her. She missed the times when he would refute back at her barbaric ways. Why isn’t he doing it anymore? He doesn’t want Cherie to misunderstand. She smiled bitterly. She knew it better than anyone else that Wei Lian wanted Cherie to accept him and be with him.

Seeing Wei Lian walk away with Cherie, joking and laughing between themselves again, her hand let loose what remained of the half-eaten ice cream cone. The ice cream cone fell onto the stone pavement. The sticky feeling from the melted ice cream awakened her. Just a few minutes…and the ice cream had already turned into sticky goo. Just like the weird relationship between Wei Lian and herself…

“Oh ya, I forgot to pay Cherie for your ice cream!” Jason suddenly remembered and pulled Fang Qi along to catch up with Cherie and Wei Lian. “Cherie, wait!” He called her back. Cherie and Wei Lian turned around as Jason and Fang Qi caught up with them. As Jason dug into his wallet for money and talked to Cherie at the same time, Wei Lian and Fang Qi stood like statues next to them. The awkward silence was suddenly disrupted by loud footsteps heading towards their direction. A group of secondary school boys were chasing one another around the mall and before the four of them could react, the boys were charging in their direction.

Wham! The impact of the running boys charging into them was so huge that all four of them almost collapsed into a heap onto the floor. The girls shrieked in pain. Upon seeing the boys charging towards them, Jason had reached out to hold on to Cherie who was in front of him. Wei Lian, whose arm was being held by Cherie before that, had instinctively reached out in front of him to grab hold of Fang Qi and tried to break her fall. Fang Qi held on tight to the pair of strong arms that had prevented her from hurting herself against the floor. Their reactions were so swift yet so natural, all four of them felt really awkward. As if guilty that they had done something wrong, all four quickly loosened their grip on each other and started to busy themselves by dusting their jeans and adjusting their clothes that were ruffled in the collision.

“Everybody ok?” Jason asked, breaking the silence. “Ya la! Those idiot boys! Their eyes grow on their backside issit?” Fang Qi started to scold. In actual fact, she was trying to conceal her thumping heart which was beating so hard she felt it was going to burst any moment. She was stunned when Wei Lian suddenly reached out to hold her. The familiar warmth had made her want to throw her arms around him. But it all happened too quickly. No! Stop! She knew she had to stop it. She said to Cherie and Wei Lian, “Ok la, you all go shopping la. We go off first.” With a half-hearted wave at Cherie, Fang Qi pulled Jason along and walked towards the exit of the mall.

Chapter 23

2006-02-27T22:22:00.000-08:00

“Shi Bu Shi Ni You Liang Zhong Gan Jue....Suo Yi Ni Bu Xiang Zai Rang Zi Ji Wu Fa Zi Ba?

Chapter 23

With the TV remote control in his hand, Wei Lian switched channels restlessly while having his lunch. This afternoon, he is scheduled to perform at the first of a two-day gig at Crown Hotel, which Granny Gin owns. Granny Gin always has requests for such engagements and the first person she will approach whenever there is a need for singing performances will naturally be Wei Lian.

Tucking into his packed lunch of curry rice, he was at the same time preparing his stuff and the clothes he needed for the gig. As it was a two-day event, Granny Gin had thoughtfully checked Wei Lian into a hotel suite so that he need not have to shuttle between home and hotel.

Feeling strangely moody, he dug uninterestingly at the rice, barely finishing half of it. He felt bloated when he usually has a hearty appetite. So soggy and tasteless how to eat? Later eat already get the runs, no energy to sing, that would be even worse. Wei Lian found an excuse to throw away the curry rice. Don’t know why, but lately, everything he ate seemed tasteless to him. He just ate for the sake of eating. Upon finishing packing his guitar into the guitar case, he grabbed his bag and guitar, ripped a banana from the already-ripen bunch lying on the dining table for days, gobbled it fast before setting off to the hotel.

Fiddling with the parcel in her hands, Fang Qi was in a state of deliberation. She reached for her handphone and scrolled into her address book. Wei Lian, the screen showed. Her finger was on the Call button, just waiting for the courage to press on it. She did not want to call him at all at this moment, but Ah Ma had sent a present for him and wanted Fang Qi to pass it to him. She didn’t want Ah Ma to call Wei Lian only to find out that he hasn’t got her present. Then Ah Ma will be sure to grow suspicious of their act.

“Iya call la call la, scared what, why should I be scared of that heartless idiot…” In actual fact, as much as Fang Qi tried to deny, she just wanted to hear his voice. She wanted so much to talk to him again, even though she thinks he won’t want to hear her voice. Fang Qi pressed the Call button, listened to the monotonous ringtone and waited. Her heart pounded furiously.

“Hello!” A cheerful voice sounded through the phone.

It was Cherie. She could recognize her voice. Oh gosh, is Cherie really so into his life now that she is even picking up his calls. A sudden surge of jealousy overcame her…

“Erm…” she was wondering what to say next. All she really wanted was to hang up.

“Fang Qi? Looking for Wei Lian ah? He is preparing for a performance later leh.”

“Orh, nothing la, I just wanted to pass some stuff to him.”

“Hey, you free anot? You want to come over and pass it to him?” Cherie explained to her that Wei Lian is performing at the hotel today and tomorrow, doubting he will have any time to meet her anywhere other than the hotel.

Scribbling down the hotel address, Fang Qi ended the call with Cherie.

Enthusiastic applause filled the hotel ballroom. The guests were obviously awed by Wei Lian’s astounding performance. Wei Lian had impressed everyone with his strong and down-to-earth voice, which has in it a unique element that touches the hearts of all.

While Granny Gin and Cherie were busy mingling with the guests at the post-event reception, Wei Lian was not in sight. He had quietly slipped out of the reception area to take a stroll outside. Deep in his thoughts, he was really not his usual self today. He did not know why but he just wanted a breath of fresh air.

Stretching his arms for a deep breath, Wei Lian strolled along the hotel swimming pool with his white cane, enjoying the breeze in the quiet atmosphere. He could hear the soft ripples of the pool with the rustle of leaves from the trees surrounding the pool. There was nobody at the pool at this time, since most guests were at the post-event party. He folded up his white cane and listened to the water ripples. Surprisingly, the combination of sounds from the rippling water and the rustling leaves sounded oddly good to him. His lips curled up as the soft breeze touched his face.

There he was, drowning his thoughts in the comfort of the calming surroundings when suddenly out of nowhere, someone whizzed past him. A waiter was pushing a trolley full of snacks and drinks from the hotel kitchen to the reception area as the reception was at the adjoining tower. In a rush, he accidentally pushed and knocked Wei Lian into the pool. Wei Lian let out a cry as he lost his balance. His white cane fell onto the floor and became disassembled under the merciless wheels of the trolley. Not realizing that he was blind, the waiter just shouted “Sorry, sorry!” and hurried to the reception, thinking that the guy will be able to come up on his own.

Fang Qi was wandering in the hotel premises, still reluctant to make the move to look for Wei Lian. When she reached the hotel, the performance had already ended. She just couldn’t bring herself to call him on the handphone. What if Cherie picked up again? Hai! Just as she turned towards the swimming pool, she watched in horror as Wei Lian fell headwards into the pool. Her heart skipped a beat. She remembered him saying he didn’t know how to swim during one of their squabbles.

Seeing Wei Lian in the pool, his hands waving in desperation, Fang Qi was in a state of fright at that moment. Everything came too fast and she least expected such a thing to happen. She didn’t know what to do amidst her anxiety. There was no one around then. She panicked and mumbled Wei Lian Wei Lian, helpless tears forming in her eyes.

Her heart dropped as she saw Wei Lian’s struggle weaken and without further ado, she jumped into the pool, swimming towards Wei Lian with all her might. She managed to catch hold of Wei Lian’s arm and pulled him to her side. As his head lay on her shoulder, the familiarity of the closeness she once shared with Wei Lian overcame her. She fought back all the confusion invading her mind now. She only knew she had to get Wei Lian out of the pool immediately.

Wei Lian was already in an unconscious state. While moving towards the side of the pool, flashes of the moments between Wei Lian and her came flooding into her mind. She had failed to block them out. She realized how important Wei Lian is to her. Please, please, nothing must happen to you, I still haven’t bickered enough with you yet. I still haven’t told you I don’t want this to be an act anymore. I….

Fang Qi pulled Wei Lian up from the pool with all her might, wailing his name and for help in between. His face was as white as sheet. He must have swallowed too much water. Using the basic knowledge of first aid that she had just acquired during her days as a volunteer, Fang Qi pumped on his chest. After a while, a flow of water came out of Wei Lian’s mouth. He was still unconscious. She had no choice but to do a mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. As her mouth met his, her hot tears fell on his wet face. Wake up! She screamed in her mind. You better wake up you silly idiot!

Finally Wei Lian stirred and regained consciousness, coughing as he was choked with water. On seeing the color returning to his face, she heaved a temporary sigh of relief. Suddenly she heard footsteps approaching. As she looked up, she saw Cherie walking towards the pool, looking around worriedly. She realized Wei Lian was not around with her and Granny Gin at the reception. Only after quite some time did she find him missing. Thinking he would be at the hotel room resting, she was worried when she couldn’t find him there. Where has he gone to without a word?

Fang Qi’s first reaction upon seeing Cherie was to hide. She didn’t want anybody to see her in this flurry state. Wei Lian should be fine now. Throwing her emotions aside, she took one last look at Wei Lian and ran off to hide behind a pillar.

“Wei Lian!” Cherie was instantaneously shocked to see Wei Lian lying at the poolside, all drenched and coughing profusely. She quickly helped Wei Lian up and brought him back to the hotel room. Wei Lian was still in a state of shock and was not aware of what was happening at all.

Seeing them disappear behind the hotel side entrance, Fang Qi finally turned away. She hid in a corner behind the pillar and succumbed to uncontrollable sobs. Her legs weakened and gave way under her, and she fell onto the ground, with her head buried in her body. She wanted so much to be by Wei Lian’s side. She wanted so much to be the first one to talk to him when he regained consciousness. She wanted so much to tell him she missed bickering with him. But she couldn’t do any of those. She knew she had to let go when she saw Cherie. She knew she had to.

What Fang Qi did not know was that all that had just happened was witnessed by Jason who came by to look for Cherie. Jason saw Cherie stumbling back to the hotel with Wei Lian. He did not know what to react, staring at their backs as they staggered back into the hotel. He too did not know what to think of the relationship between Cherie and Wei Lian. And now Fang Qi. His mind was a total blank.

At the hotel room, as Wei Lian slowly regained consciousness, he felt someone holding onto his arm tightly. He cocked his head to the side and tried to listen who was with him.

“Wei Lian, how are you feeling? Don’t frighten me hor...” Cherie’s voice.

Wei Lian managed a weak smile, “I’m ok la…”

Wei Lian tried to recall what had happened. He vaguely remembered that he was strolling by the poolside when he was pushed into the pool. During the ordeal, he bizarrely had an indescribable feeling, one of throbbing pain and yet reeked of familiarity. It was not physical pain. No lay, he wasn’t hurt in any way. He couldn’t apprehend the feeling that was going through him. Pushing his thoughts aside, he faced Cherie.

“Thanks ah…” muttered Wei Lian. He assumed that Cherie was the one who saved him.

Cherie put her hand to his mouth and whispered. “Shhhh, come on, don’t talk any more, take a good rest ok? You are tired already.” She proceeded to tuck Wei Lian to sleep. Under his tired expression, his heart was smiling quietly as Cherie fussed over him. He felt he was the happiest man on earth.

At the poolside, Fang Qi’s tears were running dry. In a weak struggle, she pulled herself up. Jason witnessed her true feelings for Wei Lian. The rude and rough big-time gambler whom he knew so little about. She actually has her fragile side, he thought. He really felt for her, seeing her crying so sadly. He loves Cherie but she loves Wei Lian. Fang Qi loves Wei Lian but he loves Cherie. Where does this leave both Fang Qi and himself? Irony. Wei Lian. Two girls loving him. How fortunate he is. He smiled bitterly.

Finally, he stepped out of his hiding place when he saw Fang Qi shivering with cold from the wetness on her body in the chilly evening breeze. “Erm you okay? Shall I send you home?” His tone was gentle with concern, not the unwilling rude tone he had always given her.

Fang Qi was shocked upon hearing Jason’s voice. She turned and looked up fiercely at him, uncomfortable with his presence. Why is he here?! Did he see anything?! She wanted to ask, but brushed the thought aside.

“No need!” she replied curtly, with one hand wiping off her tears. With that, she staggered away weakly but her right knee hit against a suntan chair. She put her hand on her bruised knee as she picked herself up again. Cold! The soft breeze is getting to her. But she could not care less. The crying earlier on had numbed the whole of her. She no longer knew what was pain.

“Hey, careful! Come on, you need to have a hot bath now.” Jason followed behind her and grabbed her by the arm. He insisted that she went up with him to the hotel room he booked. One person hurting deeply inside is bad enough. There isn’t a need for another one.

“Leave me alone! Go away can?!” Fang Qi shouted uncomfortably.

“Don’t be stubborn la. You want to fall sick is your problem, not mine okay! I just don’t want to be accused of not helping someone who is freezing to death. Want to die also don’t die now. Die when I am far away from you can?” Jason decided to snap at her. This girl needs to be shouted at.

Silently, both stared at each other. Finally, she relented and allowed Jason to bring her back to his hotel suite.

Darkness fell. Fang Qi was still at the hotel. Jason had forced her to have a hot bath. She too relented. But she sneaked out the moment Jason fell asleep. He had been too tired and had fallen asleep while waiting for her to finish her bath.

Strolling along the pool, she still felt weak. Her eyes felt terribly swollen. Her head felt horridly heavy. She wasn’t in a stable state of emotions. Feeling angry with herself, she jumped into the pool and stayed under the water for seconds before surfacing. She needed to cool herself down. In a fit of anger, she threw the present Ah-Ma had for Wei Lian --- a stylish man’s bracelet, into the blue sparkling water.

Fang Qi woke up with a stinging headache. The noon sun was beaming through her apartment window onto the foot of her bed. She thought of what she did at the hotel last night. Ah Ma’s bracelet for Wei Lian! All at once, she jumped out of bed, changed into a set of fresh clothing and ran out of the house without even brushing her teeth.

Seeing no one at the pool, Fang Qi leapt into the swimming pool and searched frantically for the bracelet. She regretted throwing it away. She was always regretting things that she had done, or not done. What’s wrong with me, she questioned herself, as she tried to find the bracelet.

After almost an hour of searching in the pool, she finally found it. The metal surface of the bracelet was badly scratched. After all, she had thrown it into the pool with all her might. But she was glad to see that it was still in one piece.

As she climbed up from the pool, her whole body dripping with water, she smiled weakly to herself. Holding the bracelet close to her chest, she walked away from the pool. Almost immediately, she sensed the ever so familiar feeling as she almost bumped into someone who was walking past. She didn’t have to look up. She knew it was Wei Lian…

Chapter 22

2006-02-26T18:39:00.000-08:00

“Shi Shen Me Rang Wo Xin Luan Ru Ma – Ni De Man Bu Zai Hu, Hai Shi Wo De Zhi Zhuo Ren Xing?”

Chapter 22

Fang Qi sat on the sofa, her eyes never leaving Wei Lian and her Ah Ma. Ah Ma had complained of a stiff shoulder and Wei Lian quickly volunteered to give her a massage to ease her discomfort. Fang Qi was touched at his thoughtful gesture, yet her eyes brimmed with unspoken pain. She knew this was the last time that Wei Lian is going to act as her boyfriend. She knew she will never get this close to him after today.

Ah Ma had called up both Fang Qi and Wei Lian early in the morning to invite them over for a good lunch before she leaves for the States on the night flight. Shortly after Ah Ma’s call, Fang Qi received Wei Lian’s call. “Hey. You want to meet downstairs Ah Ma’s place before going up anot?” Fang Qi knew Wei Lian’s intention was to make it appear as if both of them came together. She struggled to understand why he can still be bothered to help her. He already had his Cherie. Who am I to him? She thought bitterly.

“…two of you must come and visit me one day ok?” She heard Ah Ma asking. “Ok la Ah Ma. See when this person is free lor.” Fang Qi answered teasingly, referring to Wei Lian. She decided to get into character. After all, this was going to be the last time. Wei Lian grinned and patted Ah Ma on her shoulders. “Ah Ma, when we come over to visit you, you must cook your big feast for us again ok? I love the spicy chicken you made the other time!” Wei Lian played along.

Fang Qi smiled sadly and thought,” If he says anymore, I’m going to believe he is for real lor.” She looked fondly at this guy she loved to quarrel with. Since when did he start looking so darn endearing?? Before she could pinch herself, Wei Lian’s handphone rang. Immediately, he answered it, and his face lit up as he listened to the caller. Slowly, he moved away from Ah Ma and spoke softly into the handphone. Fang Qi looked away so that Ah Ma could not see her pained expression. It was definitely Cherie calling.

Wei Lian hung up shortly, while Ah Ma excused herself to go to the kitchen to prepare lunch. “Oh yah, Ah Girl, I bought some things to bring back to the States. Can you and Wei Lian help me pack into my luggage?” Ah Ma called out from the kitchen. No response. Wei Lian, hearing no answer from Fang Qi, replied “OK!” He stood up and started to move towards Ah Ma’s room. As he was unfamiliar with the place, he hit his leg against the coffee table. Fang Qi jumped up from her trance-like state and put her hand on his shoulder to stop him from moving further. “Careful la!” she hissed and led him to Ah Ma’s room.

“Wah what did Ah Ma buy man?” she muttered under her breath, rummaging through the bags of stuff on the floor next to the luggage. Wei Lian sat on the bed, listening to the sounds of paper bags crushing against each other. “Iyo, you going to destroy Ah Ma’s things already la.” He chided Fang Qi. He told himself that he had to be nice to her today, but somehow the nice words never came to him when talking to her. When he met her today, he had a strange feeling. It was like meeting someone he had been very close to after a long while. But the weird thing was he did not know what to say. Except mean things. Maybe it’s because he hadn’t been bickering with her for a long time, and he’s making up for what he had missed. It must be it, he told himself.

“What la? You one day never say me you not happy issit?” Fang Qi’s tone was obviously upset. “You think just because you help me fool Ah Ma you have the right to say me issit? ” Fang Qi glared at him.

“Iya….” Wei Lian started to say, but his message alert rang. He quickly took out his handphone and listened to the incoming message. Fang Qi caught a knowing smile on his face as he read the SMS. Her heart ached.

“Iya, I where got say you la.” He responded half-heartedly while he replied the SMS.

“You never say me? Please la, if you don’t want to help me anymore, you can don’t help ok. Nobody is pointing a gun at you hor!” Fang Qi lashed out at him. She was too frustrated to think. One million and one emotions were flowing through her. She was feeling dizzy.

Beep beep. Another SMS came in. Fang Qi stared at Wei Lian as he proceeds to retrieve the SMS and replying it. He wasn’t even interested in rebutting her now, she thought. Hot tears formed in her eyes but she fought them back. She was not going to cry with him around.

“Iya, we are friends mah, plus you are my buddy’s sister, so since we already started the act, then I help to carry on lor. You don’t say until I so unwilling can anot.” Wei Lian carried on with conviction, as if trying to convince himself.

Beep beep. As Wei Lian listened to the new message, he could have sworn he heard soft sobs in the room. Can’t be la, she cry for wat? , he thought. Little did he know that the tears that Fang Qi was fighting so hard to hold back were already rolling furiously down her face.

Fang Qi took a bite of rice and chewed. She had no appetite. She had hid inside the bathroom for a while before coming out to join them for dinner. She just wanted to make sure Ah Ma cannot see her swollen eyes. But luckily for her, she quickly disguised it as not having enough sleep when Ah Ma asked. With her constant rubbing of her eyes as she yawned, Ah Ma nodded knowingly and did not ask further.

Seeing her only chewing the plain white rice in the bowl, Ah Ma sounded a bit concerned over her usually loud-spoken granddaughter. “Iyo Ah Girl ah, Ah Ma cooked so much, why you only eating white rice? Take more vegetables mah.” With that she leaned forward and wanted to scoop some vegetable curry into Fang Qi’s bowl. But Wei Lian’s fast reaction made her retract back her outstretched hand, which was about to reach for the long soup ladle.

With swift and accurate motion, Wei Lian effortlessly grabbed the soup ladle with one hand while the other hand held reached out for Fang Qi’s bowl. However, his hand landed on Fang Qi’s hand instead. Knowing that Ah Ma was looking, he gave Fang Qi’s hand a playful squeeze and went on to feel for her bowl. He brought it close to the pot of fragrant vegetable curry. He scooped some of its contents into her rice bowl and passed it back to her. “Nah, Ah Ma’s vegetable curry so nice and you are only eating plain rice. Thought you keep ranting about missing Ah Ma’s vegetable curry? Now have liao you don’t eat. How can lor? Don’t be so rude la you. You not on diet also what. Why only eat plain rice?” His hands cupped over hers as he put the bowl into her hands, urging her to eat.

Fang Qi came out of her stance and took over the bowl of rice, now topped with vegetable curry. Vegetable curry. Her favorite. This is the fifth time Ah Ma had cooked it since her return. But those were after she left the beach house. She only briefly mentioned it in front of him the day before Ah Ma came back to Singapore when they were rehearsing their lines. But she thought he wasn’t really concentrating then.

Can he don’t do this to her or not? Can his memory become lousier? Of all things, why is his memory so good? Knowing that Wei Lian actually remembers what she loves to eat, Fang Qi couldn’t help but feel emotional suddenly. And can he don’t touch her hand or not? She can’t help but get reminded on the intimacy they shared previously. Be it pretence or not, she knew it will never happen again.

The nagging feeling within her threatens to overwhelm her. She was afraid she couldn’t take it anymore and her emotions will burst at the seams. Seeing him trying to put on his best act in front of Ah Ma for her sake, her heart ached with confusion. She really couldn’t bear seeing him do that.

She knew him. He wouldn’t do something he disliked. When he is unwilling to do something, he wouldn’t do it even if you forced him to. But she remembered his words. “If you are not Fang Tong’s sister, I wouldn’t have bothered about you….” He was just helping only because she is his buddy’s sister and not because of her. She thought quietly inside her, her heart so tight she almost couldn’t breathe. She understood that better than anyone else. Didn’t she know that all along?

With that, she snapped out of her thoughts and replied, “Eh? You know I like to eat this meh?” She purposely said it in a challenging tone, in order not to arouse Ah Ma’s suspicion.

“Eh, you know what you talking about or not? You are my girlfriend mah. I where dare to forget what you like ah? Wait you angry with me again how?” He replied grudgingly with an answer and tone so natural that Fang Qi’s eyes threaten to brim with moist. As he replied, his left palm faced down, trying to feel for an empty soup bowl. Eh? Where is the bowl? Thought Ah Ma put it on his left side just now?

Ah Ma looked on as they both exchanged words. Then she interrupted. “You see la Ah Girl, you better treat Wei Lian nicer ok? He even bothered to remember what you like to eat already very good la. You behave yourself la. Last time you treated Jake like a precious gem, now Wei Lian is better than him and you treat him like this! Ah Girl ah, you don’t take Wei Lian for granted…..”

The pair of noisy chopsticks picking at the food in the bowl stopped. Fang Qi’s body froze while Wei Lian remained in his “cannot be bothered” position and continued eating. Jake? She hadn’t been thinking about him for a long while. All she had in her mind is…..

Ah Ma caught her embarrassed reaction. Realizing that she had mentioned something inappropriate, Ah Ma crackled with unease. “Err…Wei Lian, Jake he…he is Ah Girl’s ex-boyfriend. Sorry hor, Ah Ma too long never nagged at her liao….Ah Girl got tell you about Jake or not hah actually?”

Wei Lian stopped eating and turned his face in Ah Ma’s direction. Swallowing his food slowly, he replied casually. “I know ah. Jake is my brother.”

“Ha? Your brother?!” Ah Ma looked at him in surprise and then turned to Fang Qi. She refused to answer.

“Oh, not exactly brother la Ah Ma, Jake is my cousin. But we are as close as real brothers la.” Wei Lian again replied. Ah Ma thought he will be jealous is it? Well, it’s only natural that she assumes I will think this way since Jake is my cousin, he thought silently as he tried to conjure a suitable explanation. Better don’t let Ah Ma worry too much. Already act until want to finish liao, might as well act some more la.

“You not jealous hor, Wei Lian?” Ah Ma said, trying to test his feelings.

Jealous? “Ah Ma, there’s nothing to be jealous about la. They broke up already mah. I also got so many friends who became another friend’s girlfriend. Ok one la. Now is now mah. The past doesn’t matter. But Ah Ma, I won’t give up the girl I love so easily. I know when to fight back one.” He tried to lighten the atmosphere with his casual tone. He knew what Ah Ma was afraid of and assured her with a smile.

No. He was not lying or cooking up a reply for Ah Ma. He had actually already conjured another answer but before he knew it, the heart-felt words just flew out of his mouth.

“Iya what are you doing la? The bowl is here la. What you want to take? I take la.” Fang Qi wouldn’t hear anymore of the on-going conversation. She wanted to stop the awkward and sensitive topic. And she quickly found an excuse. She turned to chide him and slapped his hand away impatiently. Wei Lian had accidentally dipped his thumb into the bowl of hot herbal chicken soup. She quickly reached for a tissue from the tissue box on the dining table and wiped the drops of hot soup off his thumb. “You see la, red liao la your thumb. Okay anot?” She continued muttering angrily.

She just cannot imagine him dipping his fingers into the bowl of hot soup. What if it’s a kettle full of boiling water?! Also touch it la, issit?! He got no feelings one issit? This guy just wants to act smart in everything. He always managed to make her feel so small in front of him. She detested this kind of feeling that intruded her thoughts whenever she sees him so independent. Her stubborn personality refused to admit that she is after all only a girl and that her ego has been busted.

“Iya, I’m okay la. Nothing one la. Always like that what. Hurt a bit won’t die one la. Take soup for you mah.” He pulled back his thumb from her touch rapidly and disguised the weird and numb feeling that he felt in his heart with his usual nonchalance. He picked up his rice bowl and continued eating.

As he withdrew his hand quickly from hers, a look of hurt and disappointment flashed across Fang Qi’s face. She quickly hid it by turning to Ah Ma and telling her how much she will miss her when she goes back to the States.

Oh god, can he don’t sound so sweet and caring now, but yet blow hot and cold anot? It was this feeling of him blowing hot and cold that was killing her. She is already confused enough. What does he want?? She suddenly felt a strong urge to spill the beans and tell Ah Ma that they were just acting only. But quickly, she postured herself as she saw Ah Ma looking dotingly at Wei Lian. Clearly, Ah Ma liked Wei Lian a lot. Much more than Jake, she thought.

In the cab on the way to the airport, Wei Lian and Fang Qi tried their utmost best to talk normally to each other. They have come so far, they didn’t want Ah Ma to discover that they were trying to fool her all this time. They both wanted Ah Ma to leave Singapore happily without worries.

At the departure hall, when it was time for Ah Ma to check in, she reached out for Fang Qi’s hand with her right hand and Wei Lian’s hand with her left hand and put their hands tightly together. The sudden feel of their hand against each others’ set both Fang Qi and Wei Lian’s hearts racing. Stop it, they both said in their hearts.

“Both of you take care hor. Ah Ma has been very happy on this trip back to Singapore. Hope one day Wei Lian you can come with Ah Girl to visit me. You promised one hah?” Ah Ma teased, while holding on to both their hands, as if not wanting to let go. Upon hearing this Fang Qi was overwhelmed with emotions and flung herself onto Ah Ma, weeping like a baby. “Ah Ma! I will miss you!” Indeed, she was going to miss her grandma. But the catalyst of her reaction was not this. She had enough of Wei Lian chiding her the whole day, enough of his happy look whenever his handphone rang or SMS-es came in, enough of him acting so caring towards her in front of Ah Ma, enough of this pretence. It was crushing her heart into bits.

“Silly girl la!” Ah Ma laughed. “You and Wei Lian can come and visit me mah!” She comforted her. Wei Lian gave a wistful smile, a little shocked at Fang Qi’s outburst. Strangely, his heart went out for her. The nagging feeling inside had been bugging him the whole day too. He still can’t figure it out.

“Ok la, Ah Ma go in liao. You two take care!” Ah Ma said and started to walk through the immigration counter, turning to wave goodbye once she was through. Fang Qi waved at her through the glass doors, watching her disappear down the corridor.

They stood there for what seemed like an eternity, each having a million thoughts running through their confused minds. Suddenly Wei Lian’s handphone message alert sounded. He put his handphone at his ear and listened. “My dear Wei Lian, Ah Ma here. I just want to thank you for helping Ah Girl to pretend you are her boyfriend to make me happy. You are a good boy. Hope to see you again if there’s a chance. All the best.” Wei Lian’s heart was pounding furiously upon reading the message. Ah Ma knew it all this while. His mental turmoil worsened and he just wanted to get out of the airport. Fast. “Erm… I got something on. I leave first hor.” was all he could manage to say to Fang Qi.

Cherie again. Fine. Just go! Fang Qi could feel her frustration mounting and her tears surging up again. She swallowed hard and said “Iya, just go la, no need to bother about me la.” Her voice was almost breaking. Wei Lian sensed that Fang Qi was close to tears again and tried to say some comforting words to her. “Er, you can always visit Ah Ma soon ma, don’t be so sad la. You still got Fang Tong, got all your friends, got me ma. Don’t cry liao la, cry baby.”

Oh god, what is this she’s hearing? Can he not be so nice to me now? Fang Qi wanted to put her hands to her ears to shut out Wei Lian’s voice. She wanted to scream, but she couldn’t find her voice. Wei Lian shifted his feet awkwardly. He could sense that she didn’t feel any better after what he said.

Finally, Fang Qi collected herself and said, “I..I’m going to grab something to eat. Bye.” Without waiting for a response, she turned and walked away quickly. A wild instinct made Wei Lian reach for her arm to stop her, but he grabbed her hand instead. Fang Qi struggled to fling his hand away. “Leave me alone la!” She said with firm resolve and walked quickly away from Wei Lian before her tears start streaming down again.

Standing alone amidst the busy airport crowd, all Wei Lian could feel was a sickeningly aching feeling in his heart.

Chapter 21

2006-02-25T22:15:00.000-08:00

“Dang Wo Bao Zhe Ni De Shi Hou, Chuang Wai Feng Fei Qi, Huang Ye Piao Luo... Yi Wei Shi Lang Man, Yuan Lai Zhi Shi You Xin Zai Fei Zou...”

Chapter 21

Wei Lian sensed the tension and decided he should leave them alone to talk. Just when he was walking to his room, he heard a voice that made him cringe. “Wei Liannnnnnn….” Iyo! What is that woman doing here, and of all times??

“Wei Lian dear, you at home ah? Lucky me got you in time.” Jace squealed, pinching his cheeks. “Want to go eat dinner a not?” her hands hanky-pankied on Wei Lian again. As she looked across the house while Wei Lian was trying hard to pry her stubby fingers off his cheeks, she realised Fang Qi and Jake were there too.

“Wah so many people here ah? Party ah? Sorry hor, didn’t see you all just now, Pai seh la, Wei Lian so especially cuteeeeeeeeee today, my eyes only went straight for him. Hahaha!” Jace gushed non-stop.

Fang Qi looked on in bewilderment. Wah today almanac good day ah, why everybody in the world seems to be coming to the beach house today, she thought to herself. Her eyes widened in horror as she watched Jace attempting to pull Wei Lian’s cheeks again. This time he was fast to react.

“Eh, don’t anyhow touch can a not. Already told you many times don’t do that, very irritating lay.”

“Iya, you so cute today mah, let me pinch awhile will die meh? Ok la, we go and eat dinner okie. Come la.” Jace tugged at his sleeve and hooked her arms into his. “Eh, you two come along also lay!” she beckoned to Jake and Fang Qi who obediently followed them. They each had a lot on their minds and they didn’t have the energy to object.

Dinner was a drag. How exciting can it get when there are three glum looking people who barely uttered a word and one chatterbox who just couldn’t stop talking. After dinner, Wei Lian finally managed to “get rid” of Jace by firmly telling her that he wanted to go back and sleep, as he got to wake up early tomorrow to work. Jace had no choice but to go back with Jake, pulling Fang Qi along, insisting that Jake send her back. Fang Qi hesitated for a moment, but seeing that Wei Lian had already started to walk off, she bit her lip and left with Jake and Jace.

As Wei Lian stepped into the beach house, his handphone suddenly rang. “Hello, hello?” Private number. “Hello, Wei Lian ah, it’s Ah Ma la. How are you? How come you didn’t come and visit me with Ah Girl since that day? Is she there ah?” Fang Qi’s Ah Ma asked cheerily. Wei Lian wasn’t sure what happened after the act that day. Fang Qi had ran out that very night and never returned to the beach house nor called him again until he met her on the streets today. But it seems Ah Ma still had the impression she was staying at the beach house. Thus he briefly said that she had gone out and hadn’t come back yet. “Oh actually, Ah Ma just wanted to let you all know that I am returning to Los Angeles this weekend la.” She explained. Wei Lian chatted with Ah Ma for a while and hung up.

He slumped on the sofa and started to compose an SMS. Then he stopped and pressed “Clear”, deleting the contents. He deliberated for a long while before finally clicking on “Write message” again. He decided to SMS Fang Qi to tell her about the news. “Ah Ma says she is leaving this Saturday. You didn’t tell her we broke up?” he typed and pressed “Send”.

Sitting in Jake’s car, Fang Qi stared at her handphone screen. The message inbox showed Wei Lian’s name. Seeing his name, Fang Qi started to boil. The whole night, Jace kept molesting Wei Lian over dinner. It was disgusting. And he didn’t even utter a single word to her the whole night, not even when they parted ways after dinner. He had not SMS-ed or called her since the day she left. This is the first since that evening. Her thumb hovered over the “Read” button.

“Ah Ma says she is leaving this Saturday. You didn’t tell her we broke up?” the screen displayed the SMS as she finally decided to read it.

“No.” She replied.

“Thought you said you will tell her that?” The reply came surprisingly fast.

“No.” Short and sweet.

“Ok. I told her we will send her off at the airport. I think she wants to see both of us la. We arrange later.” Fang Qi rubbed her eyes and stared at the message again. Is he suggesting that we act for Ah Ma to see again? At this point in time? When everything just feels so weird and awkward? Her mind was in a mess. She didn’t know what to think. And she doesn’t know what he is thinking. She closed her handphone flap, rested her head against the car seat and closed her eyes. She wasn’t going to reply his SMS.

Chapter 20

2006-02-24T22:26:00.000-08:00

“Guo Qu De Ai Dou Jiao Wo Qi Nei… Yu Jian Le Ni, Shi Jian Dui Bu Dui? Wo Xiang Wo Bing Bu Pa Bei Ju Jue, Wo Pa De Shi Shi Qu De Gan Jue…”

Chapter 20

5pm, time to close shop. Fang Qi has managed to sell all of the bears and she felt a sense of satisfaction. But as she started to wander aimlessly again, once again she felt despondent. She knew very well why she is acting like this.

Since she saw Wei Lian this morning, she hasn’t been able to concentrate. She hadn’t seen him since the last time at the hospital. All the while, she was waiting hopefully that he will come and visit her again, but… She knew Wei Lian’s heart has always been with Cherie.

She knew that they were just play-acting in front of Ah Ma. She knew it more than anyone else. Yes, and she knew deep inside that things have changed. She is not stupid. But she just couldn’t help feeling dejected. She thought she would be able to get over him with time, but no. Not for the moment yet.

“Wah don’t pinch me so hard hor!” “Hmph, who ask you so rude to me just now, I like leh, I like to pinch you cannot meh?” Upon seeing this couple that was pinching and teasing each other on the streets, Fang Qi slumped into a state of glum. The scene brought back the not so distant memories of her bantering and bickering with Wei Lian. It all seems like yesterday. Yet….

“Stupid Tan Wei Lian, why got so many streets don’t walk, purposely must walk here and bump into me. Idiot, too long never get my kick already issit!” With that, her bad habit resurfaced, kicking anything and everything she could find on the street. “Idiot idiot idiot, I already stopped thinking of him liao, why must he come and haunt me!!! Really kiam pa man!” Fang Qi continued to mutter under her breath.

Before she realized, Fang Qi found herself at the beach house again. “Shucks, why am I back here!” Fang Qi turned back to leave immediately. Just then, Wei Lian strolled into the walkway. He is just back after seeing Cherie to the café as she had a date with Jason. He did not like this feeling at all. While he was falling deeper into the relationship with Cherie, he knew that Cherie was after all still putting up a show for Jason. He sighed softly.

Suddenly he smelt a familiar scent and stopped in his tracks. He could sense her presence. How coincidental can it be, to meet Fang Qi twice in a day.

Fang Qi was at a loss for words. She wanted to run, but he was blocking the walkway.

“Eh, sorry I was just walking and walking and dunno why I ended up here.” She blurted out suddenly. Her face flushed immediately and she wanted to slap herself for saying that. As she tried to squirm her way past Wei Lian to leave, he reached out to pull her back at her arm. The immense warmth of Wei Lian’s touch stunned Fang Qi. It felt so familiar, so reassuring, yet so distant….

“Eh, you still got things at the beach house, you forgot ah?” Wei Lian asked after a split second of awkward silence.

Fang Qi totally forgot that she still had stuff in the beach house. She only remembered that she had left in a huff after that heated exchange with Wei Lian, grabbing only her handbag with her.

Feeling the familiarity of the beach house, Fang Qi was at ease once again. “Eh, you very bad leh, that time didn’t come and visit me again.” Fang Qi tried to lighten things up.

Suddenly, Wei Lian said in his deep voice, “Sorry”.

“Huh?”

"Sorry la. That day la.” Wei Lian had been feeling guilty ever since realizing he might have hurt her deeply with his strong words when he shouted at her that day. But he was unable to express himself clearly. He didn't know how. Afterall it's not everyday that he apologised to people. Iya, she should know la, he gambled.

Before Fang Qi could react, a voice suddenly called out. “Kerry!” It was Jake. “I knew you would be here when I couldn’t find you at home.”

Fang Qi was fuming mad. Why must Jake appear at this time when Wei Lian is trying to tell her something! What an idiot!!

“Eh, Jake, how many times must I tell you, it’s impossible between us liao? One million times liao leh! I thought I already told you very, very nicely, I would love to have you as a friend and nothing more than that. Thought you already got my message, why you still refuse to understand ah, hah?” Fang Qi retorted, almost flaring.

Jake was awakened by Fang Qi’s outburst. All along, he had thought that Fang Qi is beginning to forgive him as she had already softened up that time at the hospital. He just refused to accept the truth. But he won’t give up easily.

“Can you just get off my back huh? Please?” Fang Qi couldn’t stand it anymore. The sweet memories of herself and Jake would always remain in a small corner of her heart. Time has passed, feelings have changed, Jake has had his chances and he chose to throw it away from the moment he left her. She no longer felt that kind of love for Jake. All her heart could contain now was Wei Lian.

Chapter 19

2006-02-23T20:11:00.000-08:00

“Yi Wei Shi Cuo Jue, Yuan Lai Shi Xin Zai Fei Zou, Ai Mi Lu Le, Xiang Mo Suo Shen Me? Zui Hou Zhi Mo Dao Le Ni Shou Xin De Chen Mo…”

Chapter 19

“You and Fang Qi are a couple ah?” Cherie queried.

“Putting on an act.” His answer was so straight to the point that Cherie was surprised.

“An act?” since when was Wei Lian so helpful as to help people in such tasks. Usually he wouldn’t be bothered.

“K. Don’t talk about her already. I go sleep liao.” He ended the conversation in a frustrated tone and pulled the blanket over his head.

Time crawled by the next day and Wei Lian was feeling all restless while alone at the beach house. He had gotten changed two hours ago, with the intention of visiting Fang Qi in the hospital. But two hours later, he found himself still stoning on his sofa. Finally, he finished deliberating, grabbed his bag and headed for the door.

As Wei Lian was about to push open Fang Qi’s ward door, he heard voices coming from the ward. Fang Qi. And Jake. “You want some water?” Jake asked gently. “Okie. Can I have some grapes too? But you must peel the skin away for me hor.” Fang Qi requested.

Wei Lian’s heart lurched. Did he hear wrongly or was Fang Qi speaking in a demure manner towards Jake? Jake was very attentive to her every move and Wei Lian could hear his genuine concern for Fang Qi in his voice. And Fang Qi seemed to be accepting Jake’s concern. Just a few days ago they were like arch enemies.

A peal of laughter came from Jake and Fang Qi as they shared a joke. It broke Wei Lian’s thoughts. He stepped back and slowly allowed the door to close gently. Don’t disturb them, he thought. He shouldn’t be disturbing them. And he walked away slowly, with his head hung low…

Two weeks have passed. Wei Lian had been following his daily routine - busking and back to the beach house. Each time, Cherie was at his side. They carried on the act but only when in front of Jason. However, every pretence made Wei Lian fall deeper in love with Cherie. All over again.

The closeness he shared with her that he had always longed to have, the care that she showed him ever so lovingly - he could not differentiate between pretence and reality anymore. All he knew was he was sure he loved Cherie. He never mentioned Fang Qi again.

Meanwhile Fang Qi has since been discharged from the hospital and is now helping out as a volunteer worker at an organization that her brother is in charge of. She is gradually getting used to staying at her own home, sleeping on her own bed, living her own life, helping people, not picking quarrels with others, not bickering with Wei Lian… Stop, she told herself as she tried to push memories of the beach house days out of her mind.

It is another long day ahead, thought Fang Qi, as she stationed herself in the busy shopping district beginning her day of non-stop work. Today, she is supposed to help in selling bears for charity. Asking politely every passer-by, who could be a potential donator, she smiled cheerfully, even when rejected rudely in the face by some. As she turned to approach another person, her gaze suddenly fell upon a familiar figure.

It was Wei Lian. His arm interlocked with Cherie’s, they were laughing and whispering into each other’s ears, just like any couple in love. Fang Qi froze. Should she say Hi? Or should she act blur? Before she could even react, Cherie caught her glance.

“Hey, Fang Qi! Long time no see.” Cherie chirped good-naturedly. Seeing that Wei Lian had stopped abruptly in his tracks, Cherie pulled him towards Fang Qi and the stall she had set up. Fang Qi’s heart was racing, her hand tightly clutching one of the charity bears.

“Er, hi,” they greeted each other almost the same time. Awkward silence.

“Err, oh! I’m selling some small bears for charity. The proceeds will go to the Children’s Society. Five dollars each only.” Fang Qi gushed, explaining what she was doing. She couldn’t take the wicked silence. “Buy one la Wei Lian! Support Fang Qi mah…” Cherie nudged him playfully. Wei Lian promptly reached into his jeans pocket for his wallet and dug out a five-dollar note. “Ok lor, give me one.” He offered. Cherie took the money from him and put a bear onto his outstretched palm.

There was little exchange of words, but somehow they had a mutual feeling of understanding. The chemistry was there but they just could sense the situation they are in now. Things have changed, Fang Qi is aware, regardless of how she had missed the days at the beach house, she knew it is impossible to return to those times.

Wei Lian felt a tinge of anguish. Why is he experiencing that kind of emotions? “Eh, no la, siao, cannot be.” He quickly dismissed this sudden surge of feeling as only a change of perception towards Fang Qi. At least, he doesn’t think of her as an irritating gambler already. She does have her good points. And she is doing charity work now.

Ok ok stop stop, I think too much le. I love Cherie and I always will. Wei Lian shrugged and turned to Cherie, who was now talking to Fang Qi.

“Let’s go, we’re late.” He gently held Cherie’s arm. As they bade goodbye, Fang Qi couldn’t help but think that Wei Lian just wanted to leave quickly. He can’t stand me, she thought sadly.

As Wei Lian and Cherie walked away from Fang Qi, once again engaged in a nobody-can-interrupt-us conversation, Fang Qi stood there deep in thoughts, staring after them. She saw Cherie playing with the bear Wei Lian just bought from her.

So he gave it to her……, she thought wistfully. But what she did not see was Wei Lian taking the bear back from Cherie shortly after and putting it into his bag.

Chapter 18

2006-02-23T20:07:00.000-08:00

Ni De Cun Zai Zai Bu Jing Yi De Shi Hou Yi Jing Cheng Wei Wo Sheng Ming Zhong De Yi Bu Fen… Ting Bu Dao Ni De Chao Nao, Shao Le Ni De Xiao Sheng, Wo Shi Xiang Nian Ni Ne? Hai Shi Zhi Shi Yi Zhong Guo Yan Yun Yan De Gan Jue…?

Chapter 18

Fang Qi’s palms held onto the white pillar weakly. Her face was a sheet of white. Tears welled up in her already swollen eyes. Her stomach did a flip. Pain was all she felt. Tremendous pain. She struggled to make her way to the front entrance of the hospital. She had gotten so angry with Jake that the anger had triggered her gastric pain. Jason held onto the girl who collapsed into his arms. “Gastric pain…….” was all the girl could manage. He was just walking into the front reception of the hospital when the girl staggered towards him.

“Doctor, is she okay or not?” Jason looked at the pale-faced girl lying on the bed. Big time gambler. That was her name to him.

“Are you her family or friend? Do you know her name?” the doctor asked.

“I don’t know her lay. I only met her on the streets once. Don’t know her name. Then just now she just fell onto me at the front entrance.” Jason couldn’t think of anything else to say.

“Can you please think of some way to contact someone who knows her?” the doctor threw the question back at Jason.

Eventually, Jason had no choice but to scroll through her handphone for a name to call. Eh, what is this? Why are all the numbers overseas numbers or numbers that no one picked up? Suddenly he saw a familiar number. Wei Lian’s number! What is his number doing in her handphone? He hesitated for a while before pressing the call button.

“Ya what?” Wei Lian’s tone hinged on frustration when he heard Fang Qi’s name on his handphone. “Jason here. She is in St. Mary’s Hospital, Ward 5, Bed 4, Level 5. Can you come now or not?” Wei Lian had accompanied Cherie to the same hospital for her routine heart checkup. They were just about to leave the hospital when Jason called him from Fang Qi’s handphone.

Wei Lian did not say anything but instead turned and walked back in the direction of the hospital building, pulling Cherie along. His face was dark with gloom. After Fang Qi had left the beach house, Wei Lian had felt a little regretful at the way he shouted at her. In her absence, he began to feel as if there is suddenly someone missing from his life. She had somehow become a part of his life.

For the past week, Wei Lian had been busy but reluctantly helping Cherie test Jason for his feelings for her. He realised that the more he helped Cherie, the deeper he fell in love with her. But at the end of each day, when he is alone back at the beach house, he realizes that he misses Fang Qi… he quickly brushes the nagging feeling off as a form of change in perception towards her. Despite her loud and crazy ways, she is undeniably good company.

He is unable to comprehend the mixed feelings growing inside him. But now, he is more worried about Fang Qi. Afterall, they have been facing each other for more than a week and he somehow felt that he cannot ignore her. Not now. His heart told him.

“What happened to her?” Wei Lian asked as he neared Jason, with Cherie holding on to his arm. His tone was indifferent. That’s him. That’s the way he showed concern. “Gastric. She collapsed at the front entrance. Found your number in her handphone when I scrolled through to get someone to come.” Jason’s curt reply came. Having said so, he led him to the bedside.

Wei Lian hesitated before reaching his hands out to touch the edge of the bed and felt for her arm. “Err….” Fang Qi flinched weakly. In her semi-conscious state, she saw Wei Lian. She thought she is dreaming. Huh? Wei Lian is here? Her fingers held onto his hand weakly. Feeling her clutch, he asked awkwardly, “Eh. Okay or not? How come like that?”

“Jake…..” she began to explain how Jake had made her so angry that she ended up having gastric pains. Wei Lian upon hearing Jake’s name, raised his eyebrows and awkwardly loosened his grip on her fingers. Feeling Wei Lian’s loosened grip, she stopped. She let go of his hand and turned away weakly. She thought she caught Jason and Cherie looking at her with doubt written all over their faces. Both have never heard of Wei Lian having any contact with Fang Qi. Suddenly, Cherie recognized Fang Qi. “Hi…remember me? We took the same classes in school.” she waved her hand at the pale-faced Fang Qi and said softly.

“Jake and Fang Tong are coming over soon.” Wei Lian interrupted suddenly. But the response he got was an immediate kick from Fang Qi. It was a weak kick but her foot jabbed him on his thigh.

“Eh, you can don’t anyhow kick or not? Sick still want to kick people.” Wei Lian chided in displeasure.

“Cannot! Call him for what? Ask him to go away.” Fang Qi raised her voice.

“You are really too much leh. I didn’t call Ah Ma very good already lor!” Wei Lian retorted angrily, warning her that if she dared to raise her voice again, he is not going to help her carry on the act anymore in front of Ah Ma, who had extended her stay till next month. Cherie and Jason looked on in astonishment. Wei Lian has never shouted at girls before, not even Jace.

“You….... for all I care la! The most I say I broke up with you and got back with Jake lor.” Fang Qi was pissed off. She is lying on the hospital bed and this is how he is treating her.

Wei Lian could not stand it anymore and walked out of the ward without saying another word. Fang Qi buries her face into the thick hospital pillows, leaving Jason and Cherie in deep thoughts. Wei Lian and Fang Qi……they……….

Chapter 17

2006-02-23T08:04:00.000-08:00

"Ni Ai De Shi Ta..."

Chapter 17

Cherie has not met up with Jason since her return. She wanted so much to believe what Wei Lian had told her, that Jason loves her. But her heart is reluctant to be hurt again. She doesn’t want to end up as a substitute for Jessica. She needed to know for sure.

Today, will be the day, she decided, and picked up her handphone to dial Jason’s number. “Hi Cherie! You’re finally back! I missed you a lot!” Jason gushed with happiness when he heard her voice. He had been waiting for her return for ages.

“Hi Jas, shall we meet at the beach house? I’d like to see how our favourite haunt is now.” Cherie suggested. Jason agreed since he had not been to the beach house for the longest time, as he had been busy with his work.

Cherie hung up and walked back to the beach house. She had already arrived there early in the morning, as she couldn’t sleep the whole night. She woke Wei Lian up, served him breakfast and told him her grand plan.

Wei Lian seemed oddly distant the whole time, only giving her one-word answers. “Hey, you agreed to help me with this right? Don’t tell me you’re backing out?” Cherie pleaded gently. Hai! How does she expect me to react? Wei Lian thought sadly.

Maybe she had long forgotten how he felt for her. Which may be a good thing now, he tried to console himself. “Ok la. Whatever you say k?” was all he could manage. Cherie beamed happily and reached out to give Wei Lian a hug. Oh god, please don’t do this do me, he pleaded.

The clock struck one. Shortly after, they heard a car pull up at the nearby carpark then footsteps approaching the beach house. Jason knocked gently on the door, wondering if Cherie had arrived. Cherie had bolted the door from inside earlier.

Wei Lian and Cherie sat frozen on the sofa, not knowing what to do. They were supposed to test Jason. Cherie had thought of grand plans. But now, they seemed unable to execute them.

Jason saw that the side window was ajar, and walked over to peep in. Cherie saw his shadow moving over to the window and as if on cue, she grabbed onto Wei Lian and planted her mouth on his. Wei Lian was taken aback for a split second but quickly regained his composure. Yes, he knew what exactly he had to do. Gently he wrapped his arms around Cherie and gave her a long kiss.

Jason’s heart felt like it was stabbed by a knife. He could not take what he just witnessed. Three minutes ago, he just caught Wei Lian and Cherie kissing. Both of them are his best friends and one of them is the girl he loved deeply. Now Jason understood why Wei Lian is always quiet when it comes to the topic of Cherie.

He should have realized that Wei Lian loves Cherie too. No wonder the girl whom they met at the café said that Wei Lian looked more miserable than him. He did not understand why at that time, but now, he fully understood. He felt betrayed. He is at a loss.

In the beach house, Wei Lian and Cherie could hear Jason’s footsteps moving further and further away from them. Wei Lian let go of Cherie awkwardly. Cherie turned away. Wei Lian could taste the tears running down her cheeks. She was crying.

His heart ached and a pained look flashed across his face, but he quickly disguised it by walking away to the fridge to retrieve a packet of cold beverage. This is the first time they kissed. He tried to focus and get into it but he realised that he couldn’t. He couldn’t feel anything more than just lips locking together. In fact there was a hint of frustration during their kiss.

But he didn’t know what to make of it. All he could feel was a sense of hollowness within. Emptiness.

Chapter 16

2006-02-22T23:04:00.000-08:00

“Kong Qi Zhong Fang Fu Gan Jue Dao Ni De Hu Xi, Que Gan Jue Bu Dao Ni Zhen Shi De Chun Zai...”

Chapter 16

Back at the beach house, Wei Lian laid lifelessly on the sofa, switching channels aimlessly. Since Fang Qi ran out of the beach house that evening, the whole place had been strangely quiet.

One week. The shrill laughter that often rang out, the loud voice that loves to argue with him, the sound of endlessly flowing water from the bathroom when she takes a bath. All gone. Suddenly he does not need to fend against her kicks. Suddenly there is no one to quarrel with him. Her name never appeared in his hand phone’s inbox messages again since that evening.

“Why? Cannot is it?” A loud voice shrieked in his head.

“Cannot.” The voice said again.

That is her. Her loud and barbaric ways. It just baffles and stuns him somehow.

He didn’t call her at all. And she didn’t call as she always did when she wanted him to help her run some errands while on his way back. He didn’t know if she has gone home. But he assumed she is fine. After all, no one else would have dared to challenge her fiery temper unless they are asking for trouble.

9 p.m. Fang Qi stared at Jake, her hands crushing the can of coke she held in her hands. He has been pestering her after she left the beach house. He had come by to check with her brother Fang Tong if she is at home when he was unable to find her at the beach house.

“She left.” That were the only words Wei Lian had given him. He would not speak of why she had left. “Where did she go?” He asked. “Huh? You ask me how I know lor?” Wei Lian sucked all the prune juice in the cup with his straw. “You want you call her lor.” He added expressionlessly.

“Kerry...can I talk to you for a while?” Jake looked at her helplessly. She has been glaring at him since he stepped into her apartment.

“You didn’t talk enough meh? Just now you already talked to my brother already what.” Fang Qi flinched at the thought of him calling her English name. Only Jake called her Kerry. She had loved the way he called her Kerry. But now, suddenly it sounded somewhat repulsive coming from him.

“Not that Kerry, not that. I…..just wanted to discuss if we……….can work things out……?”

Fang Qi looked at him with query on her face. The thought of him walking out of her life and now trying to walk back in now irks her. She doesn’t feel good about what she has heard. At least not now.

She is still trying to figure out the feelings she has towards Wei Lian. “Who are you la? You think you are really my girlfriend meh?!! You think I really want to help you? If you are not Fang Tong’s sister, I can’t be bothered about you man. You think you really very attractive meh? No wonder Jake dumped you last time! You think I like you to stay here meh? I pity you only!” Wei Lian’s hurtful words began to drown her thoughts. She shook her head as if trying to shake all the thoughts out of her head. She shot Jake a look. “Got things to discuss meh? No common topic lor.” She said curtly.

Common topic? Jake looked at her as if she was speaking some alien language. Of course there is… “Can we……”

“Cannot.” She finally showed her impatience and walked over to shove Jake out of her apartment, leaving a shouting Jake outside knocking furiously on the door. “Kerry. Kerry!!” Fang Qi bolted the door with frustration and walked back into her room and slammed the bedroom door. Jake’s voice trailed off behind the closed door. “I SAY CANNOT LA.” She screamed with all her might from inside the house, startling Fang Tong who ran out quickly from the kitchen.

The next morning.

Fang Qi rolled the newspaper in her hands with displeasure. The newspaper under her tight clutch was not spared. “Wah, can’t stand it man,” she thought. Such persistence! If only he showed his persistence four years ago and continued staying by her despite his family’s objections.

“Why are you standing here? Go away can?” She pushes him aside and bent down to retrieve the bottle of milk at the doorstep.

“I bought soy bean milk and crispy fried dough. Your favorite.” Jake looked at her pleadingly, his hand rose with a bag of food.

“Four years leh. Change taste liao la. Long ago liao la. I drink milk now lor.” Fang Qi retorted, purposely smirking to herself to piss Jake off.

“But you hated milk……” Jake knew she is trying to irritate and shake him off. Well….he knew it’s his fault. So he had to accept her attitude.

“I say in Chinese you don’t understand, I say in English you also don’t understand is it? How? You need me to speak in Tamil or not? You come back next year la. I will go and learn Tamil and talk to you in Tamil la!” Telling him she drinks milk now, is it that difficult to understand? “Iya I not free la, breakfast time. Bye bye!” With that she shoves Jake out of the door, leaving him staring helplessly at the door once again.

Chapter 15

2006-02-22T04:26:00.000-08:00

“Bu Jing Yi De Yi Duan Xiao Cha Qu, Wo Bu Xiao Xin Lun Xian Le...”

Chapter 15

At the turn of the doorknob, Fang Qi quickly picked up the packet of half eaten potato chips and started to pretend to munch. She had been staring into space since she returned to the beach house from the café. “Wah, you finally back from your hot date ah?” she said out loud to Wei Lian. No answer.

“Eh, why? So hot until you cannot talk issit?” she taunted him.

“What la?” Wei Lian wondered if he detected a hint of jealousy in her tone. Can’t be. This woman just wants to irritate him despite him helping her this morning. Ingrate.

“What, what? Your hot date with your Cherie mah! People ask you out you agree immediately, I ask you to help me with something small, I have to beg you until I go on my knees!!” Fang Qi shrieked at the top of her voice, unable to control herself.

“Who are you la? You think you are really my girlfriend meh?!!” Wei Lian raised his voice back at her. This woman is really testing my patience!

Hearing no response, he continued,” You think I really want to help you? If you are not Fang Tong’s sister, I can’t be bothered about you man. You think you really very attractive meh? No wonder Jake dumped you last time! You think I like you to stay here meh? I pity you only!” The hurtful words just came out in a rush from Wei Lian’s mouth. He was already hurting inside and Fang Qi ended up as his punching bag.

Before Wei Lian could even regret what he said, Fang Qi grabbed her bag and ran out of the beach house, slamming the door behind her. Her face was wet with tears.

Fang Qi wandered aimlessly on the streets, her tear-stained face quickly drying up in the humid night. She had been walking for the past few hours and it was already 2am in the morning.

Her blood was still boiling from the fiery exchange she had with Wei Lian just now. How dare he scold me and hurl all those verbal abuses against me? She cursed under her breath, kicking the litter on the floor. She had to kick something when she was angry. Bad habit.

Nobody has ever shouted at me like that! She thought furiously, this time kicking the empty dustbin in front of her, sending the dustbin tumbling down the road.

“Iyo!” A matronly voice called out. Fang Qi looked up in shock. Who was on the street at this time of the night with her? She peered down the street and saw a big figure wobbling towards her direction.

“Wah, miss ah, I collect soft drink cans but you kick dustbins ah?” the voice asked. As the figure moved under the street lights, Fang Qi saw a rotund old lady dressed in a big polka dotted dress with something that looked like a shower cap on her head. The fat old lady was holding a transparent trash bag with several flattened soft drink cans in it.

“Wah, this ah ma looks so weird and she’s collecting soft drink cans at this hour? Must be a bit crazy one.” Fang Qi thought to herself, wondering if she should turn and run away. “Luckily the streets got no cats, dogs or beggar leh, if not maybe all kena langga by you already. Die also dunno what happened.” The old lady joked and chuckled heartily. Fang Qi decided this old lady seems humorous and harmless and since she was bored and had nowhere to go, she started to make conversation with her.

“So, who are you ah?” Fang Qi casually asked. “Ohhh, I’m Honey. The little bunny. Hahahahaha!” The fat old lady laughed at her own joke, her double chin wobbling mercilessly. Fang Qi laughed for the first time in the past twelve hours. “Wah, you smile already ah? Just now your face was really black leh. Somebody made you angry ah?” The old lady asked.

Fang Qi took the chance to voice out the unhappiness she had been swallowing for the past few hours. “Ya la! I quarrelled with a friend lor!!” she exclaimed and started cursing and swearing. The fat old lady looked at Fang Qi with a queer look. “Why you look at me like that?” Fang Qi wasn’t done with her complaining.

“Iyo, wah…this friend of yours so important to you until you must kick the dustbin until it roll onto the road ah? Luckily it didn’t kill me leh!” The fat old lady laughed again. “so important to you…..so important to you….so important to you…” the words stuck in Fang Qi’s head. She could no longer hear the old lady’s chatter nor laughter. All she could hear was her own furiously beating heart. She has fallen for Wei Lian. And she could no longer deny it.

Chapter 14

2006-02-21T22:03:00.000-08:00

“Liang Ge Ren De Shi Jie, Wo Bu Ke Neng Cheng Wei Na Ge Ta... San Ge Ren De Shi Jie Tai Ji Le...Suo Yi Wo Mo Mo Dao Shu 1, 2, 3... Ba Hui Yi Fang Zai Shou Xin Li...”

Chapter 14

As they headed towards her Ah Ma’s house, Fang Qi was still reminding Wei Lian on her likes and dislikes. She was afraid Wei Lian would sabotage her at the last minute. He had been looking pre-occupied since he woke up.

“Ah Ma!!!” Fang Qi shrieked and hugged her grandma as she opened the door to welcome their arrival. “Good girl good girl!” Ah Ma beams widely, lifting her head to take a good look at her visitor. “Ah Ma, this is my boyfriend Wei Lian,” Fang Qi introduced. “Hello Ah Ma. How are you?” Wei Lian spoke in a jovial manner without even flinching. “Actor. Not bad.” Fang Qi thought quietly.

“Ah…Wei Lian ah. Come come, come in and take a seat,” Ah Ma took Wei Lian’s hand and led him into the living room. She was a little surprised as she quickly discovered that Wei Lian is actually visually handicapped. He sure looks very normal if you didn’t know him.

As expected, Ah Ma started to casually ask Wei Lian many questions about Fang Qi throughout their conversation. He took the questions at ease, and to Fang Qi’s surprise, there were some questions that he could actually answer even when she had not told him.

“Ah girl sometimes loves to take her own sweet time. Especially when she is bathing. How long you take ah, girl?” Ah Ma purposely fielded this question. This was a well-known fact in their family that Fang Qi hogs the bathroom all the time. “Yalor! She takes about one and a half hours in the bathroom and always sings loudly inside too!” Wei Lian chipped in. Ha, this is easy, his observation skills are excellent, and based on her stay at the beach house for the past week, he could say he knew her living habits inside out.

Ah Ma smiled approvingly, and fielded her final question. “Why do you like her?”

“Ah Ma, to me, love doesn’t need a reason. Happiness is not whether a person loves me or not, what matters is that I love her. She is my happiness.” Wei Lian held Fang Qi’s hand tightly as he said that in all earnestness.

Hai! What more can she ask? Fang Qi’s Ah Ma looked very satisfied with this simple yet sincere answer. But to further confirm her suspicions, she walked out on the pretext of cooking a great meal for them and hid behind the door for awhile.

“Wah so solid leh you!” Fang Qi leaned close to Wei Lian and whispered into his ears. It could be the warmth radiating from Wei Lian or for some strange reason, Fang Qi suddenly came even closer and wrapped her arms around his waist. Ahh! Warmth. She likes the warm feeling that Wei Lian emits. It made her feel comfortable.

Feeling her hug, Wei Lian’s head lowered out of natural response. His lips brush against her forehead. Then before they knew it, they are locked in a passionate kiss. It just came so naturally.

Fang Qi’s Ah Ma saw it and grinned to herself. She isn’t so stupid. She could tell they are faking an act in front of her. She wondered if she should be glad that she had such a clever granddaughter. Fang Qi thought she will be able to fool her grandma but her Ah Ma thinks otherwise.

Instead she feels that Fang Qi is definitely going to be in for a hard time this time round, judging from the way they kissed. She quietly crept away into the kitchen and began to whip up Fang Qi’s favourite dishes.

“Eh, sorry sorry…” Wei Lian pulled away first, his face hot with flush. What the hell is he doing? This is the second time he is behaving illogically with Fang Qi. “Ah. Sorry also.” Fang Qi said too, in a strangely coy manner. No, they didn’t plan for that scene.

After lunch at Ah Ma’s house, Wei Lian went off to meet Cherie, without knowing that Fang Qi was actually following him behind. Fang Qi was curious about Wei Lian and Cherie.

She didn’t know Cherie that well but she figured she must be someone really special to be able to make Wei Lian so devoted to her. A person who is usually so indifferent to the happenings in life but whose face clearly lights up upon the mention of his loved one, she has got to be really special.

On the other hand, Fang Qi also felt weirdly worried about Wei Lian as he has been looking pre-occupied until he met her Ah Ma and yet could so easily get into character to help fool her Ah Ma. This guy must be hiding all his feelings inside him.

When Wei Lian arrived at Café Mocha Love, Cherie was already seated in the usual booth where Jason, Wei Lian and herself used to occupy. Nothing much has changed except that the café had been given a fresh coat of paint.

“Wei Lian, over here!” Cherie called out. Wei Lian gave a smile of acknowledgement and walked at ease to the booth without any help. He has been there so often that he can maneuver every corner by himself.

“Hello hello.” Wei Lian was at a loss for words. “Er, how have you been? I…I…We have been thinking about you,” referring to Jason and himself. He is unsure of what Cherie is thinking and he is unwilling to say anything to jeopardize their friendship. Although deep down inside, he still has hopes that Cherie would give him a chance.

“I’ve been fine. Actually, the reason why I came back is…because I can’t forget certain things that happened.” Cherie started and trailed off. Wei Lian's heart did a somersault. He doesn’t know if she had looked up Jason yet, but his heart was filled with overwhelming optimism. He tilted his face in Cherie’s direction and waited.

“It’s been four years since I’ve left and frankly, I still have not gotten over how I feel for Jason. The reason why I’m back is because of Jason.” Cherie’s frank confession cut Wei Lian like a newly sharpened knife.

The pain and disappointment written all over Wei Lian’s face escaped Cherie’s notice as he bent down to take a sip from his ice-coffee. The ice was melting quickly and the coffee tasted diluted. He continued drinking from the straw in all concentration.

Finally he looked up and said to Cherie, “Actually, the day that you left….Jason realised that he had fallen for you long ago.” He had to tell Cherie the truth regardless how badly he was hurting inside. After all, he had always wanted her to be happy. This time was no different.

Silence. Then Cherie gave a bitter laugh. “Haha. Don’t try to console me la. I know how Jason is. If he liked me, I would have felt it.” “It’s true, Cherie. Jas couldn’t eat for days after you left because he realised the hurt he had caused you. And that he loves you too. He has been waiting for you to come back lor.” Wei Lian tried to convince her.

“I don’t believe. Unless….you help me test him.” Cherie challenged. It’s not that she doesn’t believe Wei Lian, but she felt that maybe Wei Lian was just trying to help her and Jason get together. “Ok lor,” was Wei Lian’s answer. What could he do? He decided it was better to have two happy persons than three unhappy persons.

Fang Qi sat in the booth behind theirs, hands clutched tightly around her mug of cappuccino. Why is this guy so stupid?? He loves Cherie so much but he still wants to help her get together with another guy?

From the small glass pane that separated the two booths, Fang Qi could see the pained and hurt expression on Wei Lian’s face. His downcast look made her want to go over and hug him. Huh, hug him? Fang Qi, you must have nothing better to do! She chided herself and quietly left her seat to make payment at the counter. She could not bear to listen to the rest of their conversation.

Chapter 13

2006-02-20T22:03:00.000-08:00

"Ni Shua Lai De Yang Zi Rang Wo Ku Xiao Bu De, Ni De Man Bu Zai Hu Rang Wo You Ai You Hen..."

Chapter 13

The next day...

“Wei Lian....you hungry or not?”

“Want to go out a not?”

“Ya hello? Mahjong? On la! .... Err..maybe not, I have to stay home to complete some work.”

“Hello, what? Now go chalet ah? Stay overnight? Ok ah..can la, I at my friend’s house leh--------eh.. I think cannot la, a bit rush la. I got to go out early tomorrow morning leh. Another time k?”

“I yo. Which pub are you at now? I ya don’t want la. I’m accompanying my friend now. Why? Still need to know why ah? She got dumped la! Bye!”

Wei Lian slumped on the sofa listening to his SMS-es. Since morning till now, Fang Qi has been real sweet towards him. Otherwise, she would be yakking away on the phone. Usually she would disappear for the entire day and only return in the evening or at night. But it is seven in the evening now and she is still at home. Her handphone had rung at least twenty times since morning.

Fang Qi had asked him countless times during the day if she’s gentle enough. Frankly speaking, Wei Lian thought to himself, not enough lor. He cannot stand her constant bugging. He prefers girls who are chatty but yet still being able to maintain a gentle side of herself. She ah? Really cannot make it.

“Eh, I’m trying very hard liao okay, don’t expect so much can or not?” She blasted as she hangs up the one hundred and oneth call for the day. Since this morning, no matter how hard she tried, she could never please Wei Lian. She is already rejecting invitations for gambling. She hasn’t even turned on the TV for the latest lottery results nor bought any lottery today. She is frustrated to the core.

She glared angrily at the guy who is SMS-ing on his handphone. She hates begging people but she doesn’t really have a choice. She needed his help. There is no one she really trusts to be able to pull this off. Moreover, none of her guy friends can make it because her grandmother remembers every single one of them. They won’t be able to fool her.

“Other than this stupid Tan Wei Lian, don’t tell me I got to grab any guy off the street to pretend to be my boyfriend lor!” she thought in desperation, almost pulling out her hair. Wei Lian just continued to ignore her and carried on doing his stuff.

All of a sudden, Wei Lian’s handphone ringtone broke the silence. “Ya?” The other party was silent for awhile. “Eh buddy, I…I…..” Wei Lian held his handphone and listened. All Jason could say was this. He could hear Fang Qi pacing up and down in front of him. But he chose to ignore. He didn’t need to ask what she was up to, he just knew. “Is she back?” Wei Lian finally asked. “Erm.” was Jason’s answer.

One day, just one more day and Ah Ma is going to be in Singapore. By hook or by crook she has got to make Wei Lian agree to be her fake boyfriend. She looked at the SMS on her handphone screen. “My dearie girl, your Ah Ma me is reaching Singapore earlier. Can’t wait to see you. See you tomorrow morning!”

Morning?! She must be kidding is it?! It is less than 15 hours to her arrival time which means she is already on the flight now, coming to Singapore from Los Angeles! And that means she had only got less than 10 hours to convince Wei Lian to act as her boyfriend. But he is such a hard nut to crack! She doubted 10 hours was even enough! Plus she needs to know more about him and him about her also. She knows her grandma’s pattern. She will purposely ask them things to see how well they know each other.

“Eh. If you’re not talking can you don’t hold onto the phone for so long a not? I want to talk to you leh.” Fang Qi said in exasperation as she stopped in front of his bed and started to clear away his laptop and the stacks of Braille music scores.

“Eh. You put down.” He stretched out his hand and tried to stop her.
“Huh? I hang up ah?” Jason, who was on the other line asked, stunned by his sudden seriousness. He was telling Wei Lian something.

“Don’t want. Cannot. You hang up first, I need to talk to you.” Fang Qi insisted, her hands still clutching onto his laptop.

“I’m busy.” He snapped. He wasn’t about to give in too easily to this spoilt girl. Who is she to demand things from him? He hates to be told what to do. And she was making such a din that he can’t hear what Jason was telling him. “Eh, I call you back.” He hung up before Jason could respond. He had to chase this noisy woman away first. His mind was already in a whirl, he needed to listen to Jason in peace. He was anxious to hear about Cherie.

“Eh. You put back my stuff.” Wei Lian gritted his teeth and ordered.

“Talk to me lor.” Fang Qi clutched his stuff tightly.

“I’m talking to you what.” His hand grabbed her arm, refusing to let go.

“You-know-I-don’t-mean-this-lor---.” She purposely raised her voice but speak at a slower pace.

“You can go out to the beach and find any guy.” He still refuses to comply.

“Don’t know them well la.” She quickly threw back his words

“Then since when do you know me well hah?” He retorted, angry at her demanding and unreasonable attitude. What has he done to deserve such a troublesome bundle?! He is sick of her constant bugging. But the problem is he can’t even drive her away! That is what he is exasperated about.

Three hours later.

Wei Lian kicked away his blanket in frustration and sat upright. He cannot believe that she can continue bugging him even when he is asleep. Such persistence! “I ya I give up la!”

“Really??” Fang Qi’s eyes sparkled when she heard him say that. Finally! But his face was darker than the sky outside. She knew she caught him in a worst possible timing. But she had no choice.

“Meet your grandma only right?!” he blasted impatiently, his fingers running through his hair in frustration.

“Ya. Act as my boyfriend.” She replied gleefully.

“Ok. I help you. BUT I got conditions.” He didn’t even bother getting her agreement. He decided it for her. “After I help you, you got to move out. And, you cannot bug me anymore. You cannot interfere in my personal matters also!” Last resort to drive her away. Finally he gave in to her request because he really couldn’t stand her constant bugging.

Sounds reasonable. “On la.” Fang Qi chirped.

“Ok, let’s get to work!” she jumped in front of Wei Lian and pressed him down to sit on the sofa.

“What do I like to eat?” Fang Qi asked, making Wei Lian rehearse his answers to her grandma’s favourite “interrogation” questions.

“How I know?” She always eats cup noodles and whatever she found.

“Bread with peanut butter and jam la.” FQ rolls her eyes. Purposely one, he definitely is doing it on purpose.

“K.” He answered curtly. He cannot be too bothered with her.

“What’s my favourite colour?” “Pink.” “No la!!!” she shrieked. “Alamak, it’s blue la!” “How I know. I thought all girls like pink what” He was all out to irritate her.

While they continued their bickering, Wei Lian’s handphone rang. He answered without even listening to who the caller is as he was thinking of his next line to counter Fang Qi. “Hi, it’s me.” The voice is shockingly familiar, leaving Wei Lian stunned for a moment. “Cherie? You’re back? Where are you now?” he asked eagerly, unable to contain his happiness. Cherie is finally back and all he wanted to do is to see her immediately. Cherie told him that she will meet him up tomorrow, and he agreed, with a tinge of disappointment. “Ok lo, we’ll meet tomorrow then. Good night”.

“Eh, you meeting Cherie tomorrow ah?” Fang Qi had listened to his conversation with Cherie. “Then how are you going to meet my Ah Ma?!” she asked unhappily. “What? Cannot issit? I meet who must ask for your permission ah?” They started to argue over it. “You promised me first one ma!!!” “Iya ok la ok la, I meet your Ah Ma first then go and meet Cherie. Happy?” Wei Lian compromised, as he slipped himself into bed. Better get some sleep, the day ahead is going to be a long one…

Chapter 12

2006-02-20T01:06:00.000-08:00

“Ni Shi Fou You Yi Zhong Qi Guai De Mo Li, Rang Wo Mo Ming De Xiang Kao Jin Ni?”

Chapter 12

Back at the beach house, Fang Qi plonked herself onto the soft bed and sighed. Ah..so comfy. She turned and looked at the guy who sat on the edge of the bed. Suddenly she chuckled quietly. She sat upright and put her face near his. As expected, Wei Lian felt her close presence and turned to her direction. She naughtily planted her lips on his.

“Eh, enough la, enough la! Jake’s not here what, you want to kiss for who to see?!” Wei Lian has had enough of her bold behaviour and started complaining, grabbing and flinging away the pair of arms that wrapped around his neck. Nowadays these girls are so bold one meh??? Anyhow kiss!!

“I ya, you no fun one.” Fang Qi quipped.

“I need to be fun meh? You already have fun without seeking my permission liao what. Still need me to be fun meh?” Wei Lian sulked and complained indignantly. “Next time don’t anyhow kiss can or not?” He has never met a girl whose kisses are as aggressive as hers.

“I ya I big sacrifice leh. Now we kissed, I am yours leh.” She joked and poked him.

“Issit? I’m not so easy one lor. Want to win my heart, the girl has to put in a lot of effort one.” He sniggered and turned away from her.

“I ya I’m so cute, you cannot resist me la.” She laughed out loud.

“Wah, you say yourself cute one ah. I never say. You cute meh? You bluff me I also won’t know. You can also say you are very beautiful what.”

“Oei!! You don’t purposely personal attack can or not?”

“I where dare to la? You want to quarrel, I grant your wish only mah.”

“You are not gentle at all. Talk like a brute.”

“Ya thank you. I never said I am a gentleman. I can be a gentleman, but got to see whether I want or not first lor.”

“Ya, ya, ya. Whatever. I don’t feel like playing liao. You happy la.” She cannot be bothered and quipped his frequent line.

Just then the phone rang. Wei Lian reached into his jeans pocket and retrieved his handphone. “Ya what?” It was Jason.

“Wei Lian, me ah. I heard Cherie’s coming back tomorrow.” Jason’s usually cheerful voice suddenly sounded mellow over the phone.

Wei Lian’s heart thudded. She is coming back tomorrow. His mind registered the information. He didn’t know what to say. Say he is happy? Say he is excited? The fact that she rejected him at the airport four years ago is still so fresh in his mind. All these while she never kept in touch with either of them. This one week had passed so quickly and now she is finally going to be back.

“Eh, Brute. You need help or not?” Fang Qi peered intently at the guy who threw himself on the bed. He laid down on his front beside her.

He turned his face in her direction. “What help? You think I you ah?” His voice muffled by the pillow. She playfully pecked him on his lips. Surprisingly, this time, he returned her peck. “Enough la, don’t play already can?” He turned away first, wanting to kick himself. Why on earth did he do that?? “You succeeded in making Jake angry already.”

“How do you know Jake is angry?”

“We are close cousins, when he’s angry I can tell. Got pattern one la. Not many people know.”

“He left because of you.” He didn’t guess, but instead said it in a very confirmed manner. “He kept quiet since yesterday. He is jealous liao.”

“Ya meh?” She asked defensively. She still couldn’t forget the day Jake called back from overseas and told her he wanted a breakup. Since he wanted a clean break, why should he be feeling jealous?

She turned away and stared at the wall against the bed, her mind going crazy with questions. I need a cold bath, she thought to herself. The weather was making her head spin even more. She got up, grabbed her towel and headed to the bathroom.

Wei Lian slumped against the sofa and played with the TV remote control. He changed channel after channel every few seconds. He felt restlessness building up within him. He flipped and lay on his front, his head propped against the soft sofa cushion.

“Wah I see a dead person lay.” That was Fang Qi’s first response when she came out from the bathroom. Wiping her hair dry with a towel, she slumped down opposite him. She was in a large checked shirt and a short pair of shorts she borrowed from Wei Lian’s wardrobe. Wei Lian gave her no response and continued “staring” at the TV.

“Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De......” the ringtone of the Fang Qi’s handphone played loudly. Wei Lian’s face displayed a flicker of surprise as this was one of the songs he always sang. But he kept quiet and remained in his I-am-dead-to-the-world-don’t-come-and-disturb-me stance. The remote control was still in his hand. He continued to switch channels.

“Iyo the TV spoil already la!” Fang Qi reprimanded him as she glanced at the caller ID display flashing on her handphone, which was on the coffee table. “Hello?” She sounded a little weary when she answered the person on the other line. “I ya, ok la...ok, ok, ok la!” She answered with increasing impatience. It was her Grandma. After a while, she ended the call and stared at her handphone. Sian, she thought.

Fang Qi stoned for a while and then suddenly, she rolled her eyes and came close to Wei Lian. “Erm?” Wei Lian mumbled as a response when he heard her coming close.

Fang Qi peered hard at him, thinking to herself. Wei Lian looks not bad hor? Actually he’s quite good looking la. He’s got beautiful eyes. His personality is also not too bad. She had heard about his bad temper from his mum.

Ya la, he’s very bad tempered and doesn’t like to bother about her too much. But strangely, his tolerance level towards her has been quite high. At least that is what she thinks la.

She peered closer at him. Ok la, I think on the whole his personality is quite good hor? Just that the way he talks sometimes sounds like he wants to bite off people’s head. And he tends to talk a bit louder and ruder than other guys, his temper is also hotter than most guys. I ya anything la.

“Eh, you free a not?”

“Erm?” was his response again. But his hand never stopped pressing the remote control.

“Be my boyfriend lay.”

“Ask Jake.” Still no expression from him. For nothing, why ask him be her boyfriend? Err….I ya, must be up to no good lor, this woman, he thought skeptically. Don’t care.

“Don’t want.” She refused.

“He is your boyfriend.” He finally settled on a music channel.

“He is not. He dumped me!”

Oh. So he is correct. Jake and Fang Qi have got a past.

“He is jealous.” The music channel was playing a messy rap song. Boring.

“I’m not bad one leh.”

“I cannot see. I don’t know…. I ya, who keep SMS-ing me la?” He took out his handphone and retrieved the SMS-es coming in.

“So what? At least I not ugly what.”

“Whatever.” He lazily listened to the SMS-es and proceeds to trash them.

“Oei, be my boyfriend leh!!.” She can’t stand him showing his can’t-be-bothered attitude.

“Don’t want la.” He throws his handphone onto the table.

“Help me a bit will die issit??”

“Maybe.”

“………….” Damn you! She cursed. Then she softened and poked his arm gently. “Iya can la. Other than you, I don’t know who to approach liao la.” Her attitude changed 360 degrees.

“Scroll through your handphone lor, surely got people you can call.” He flipped over on his back and “stared” at the ceiling.

“Kelvin Tan Wei Lian! Help me la, my grandma is arriving here on Saturday from the States. It’s only for one week. She is staying only for one week la.” She pulled at his sleeve, her voice sounded helpless.

“I ya don’t want la. Tell your grandmother the truth that you broke up with your boyfriend la.”

“I just told her ok. Tong told her I have a boyfriend.” All along Fang Tong and her pretended that she had a boyfriend to keep their grandmother from worrying.

“Who asked you to say you have? Say you broke up la.” He shifted and hugged the pillow instead.

“I don’t want her to worry mah. You help me can die ah? Not as if I’m asking you to really be my boyfriend what. Not telling you to really love me what. Help la. Once she’s out of sight, we don’t have to pretend liao. Anyway we also hugged and kissed before liao what. You shy ah?” She was almost pleading with him.

“You very bo liao la you. You go and kick your bad habits first then we’ll talk..” He turned and slept on his front again, covering his head with the pillow.

“What bad habits?”

“Gambling, drinking, smoking, noisy, not gentle, unladylike, like to curse and swear, talk loudly, rude, bad attitude………” He began listing a long list of what he thinks are her bad habits.

“OEI” She kicked him.

“Still got somemore… ANYHOW KICKING PEOPLE. You think you’re practicing martial arts ah?” he muttered under his pillow

“Oei!” Wei Lian ignored her and pretended to snore loudly to irritate her.

“I ya whatever, fine!” she kicked the sofa hard, hurting her foot in the process. Wei Lian stifled a laugh beneath the pillow. She whimpered and limped back to the bed, upset that he doesn’t want to help her. There must be a way, she thought…

Chapter 11

2006-02-19T20:56:00.000-08:00

“Ni De Chu Xian, Rang Wo Cuo Shou Bu Ji…Zhi Neng Mian Qiang Mian Dui...”

Chapter 11

Wei Lian raised his hands and felt the warmth on his face. He blinked his eyes feeling a very faint brightness. Stretching his arms, he felt his way up from the makeshift bed made up of a thin mattress, into the bathroom.

He squeezed some toothpaste onto the toothbrush and began washing up. Suddenly something struck him. There is supposed to be one more person. Where is she? He did not feel her presence in the room. I ya don’t care la. He began to enjoy the peacefulness around him. This is going to be a good day, he thought.

As he made his way slowly into the dining hall, his palms feeling the wall, he heard his mum laughing loudly. His back was struck with cold sweat. He stopped in his tracks, his palms against the wall, and his face with indifference.

“Auntie, I help you.”

“You like congee a not? Have some century eggs also. Still got bread and fried eggs and also baked potatoes.”

“Wah auntie, I love baked potatoes leh!”

“Really ah?! Ah boy loves baked potatoes also leh. And I made his favorite roasted wings also! Eh? He hasn’t wake up is it? Lunch time already leh. How can like that when got guests? That boy ah, I must scold him. Girl ah, you must forgive him hor, that boy is not good at expressing his feelings one hor. Which day he go and say I love you to you ah, you must tell me hor!” Wei Lian’s mum rattled on with laughter.

Oh my god. Wei Lian listened with his left palm slapping the wall surface weakly.

“Brother, you okay a not?” Jake asked from behind him.

“Huh? Okay ah.” He still faced the wall. He is trying to listen to what else Fang Qi and his mum are talking about.

“Kerry is a very nice girl.” Jake suddenly said.

Huh? Kerry? Who is….Fang Qi?

“Boy ah, come and eat la. Why are you standing there? The wall very nice to smell is it?” Wei Lian’s mum turned when she heard Jake’s voice. She made a dig at Wei Lian who is facing the wall.

Oh my god-what kind of mum is this? Wei Lian thought.

“Hi dearie!” Wei Lian’s waist suddenly got hugged. He smelt a sweet flowery fragrance coming from the hugger’s hair. Before he could react, the hugger’s lips pressed her lips down on his.

Huh??!! Oei! His face blushed furiously and he quickly brushed away the hands that hugged around his waist. “I yo! Can you don’t anyhow hug a not?” Fang Qi had timed the kiss such that only Jake could see. Auntie had her back turned as she was pouring coffee.

“Why cannot lay? Got your favorite baked potato and roasted chicken wings leh. Auntie made it specially for you.” Fang Qi’s arm auto locked with his, leading him to the dining table.

Wei Lian sat down with his arms crossed across his chest and kept silent. He hasn’t quite gotten over nor understood why Fang Qi had “attacked” him with the kiss.

Fang Qi started to get him his favorite roasted chicken wings and applied butter to the baked potato. But instead of allowing him to enjoy the taste of the spice-marinated roasted chicken wings, she de-boned the chicken wings to chicken shreds; mashed his baked potato into a gooey mush, stirred in a lot of chili sauce and pushed the plate of shredded chicken and mush in front of him.

Wei Lian heard the plate being placed in front of him and took a bite of the food. What the hell is this??! His tongue felt hot chili sauce and mush.

Fang Qi watched his facial expression change as he indifferently swallowed the glob of gooey mess. Oh sorry lor, but my kiss is not without a price. Who asked him to ignore her and slept through the night? She had kicked him numerous times till she thought she had kicked him to death. His unconsciousness scared her. It was later when she flipped him over did she realized that he was just too tired and slept right throughout.

“Auntie, your baked potato is very delicious, next time can teach me?”

“The coffee is very fragrant also, what kind of coffee beans did you use?”

Being smart and sharp, Wei Lian’s mother could see through immediately that Fang Qi is trying to irritate her son. This son of hers must have done something to irritate her. Oh good luck son, forgive your mum, me, for playing along. This is pretty fun! Hardly does she get to see her son being played back. This should teach him how to curb his bad temper.

And all this while, Jake was watching his ex-girlfriend. His heartless departure had turned her into a gambler and made her acquire bad habits. His heart sank watching her behave with such a radically different personality from her original sweet and caring self. And why was she with Wei Lian? He hadn’t talked to her since the day he met her at the beach house. And she was obviously avoiding him. Before he could even think of how to approach her, she had followed Wei Lian back to the beach house.

Chapter 10

2006-02-19T05:16:00.000-08:00

“Ai Yue Shen, Hen Yue Shen. Bai Tuo Bu Liao De Si Nian, Yi Ran Chan Rao Zhe Wo De Si Xu”

Chapter 10

It turned out that Wei Lian’s cousins, Jake and his sister, were also invited for the dinner as Wei Lian’s mum has not seen them for a long time. Fang Qi immediately regretted pestering Wei Lian to let her come along. She became subdued and hardly uttered a word in Jake’s presence. She tried hard to avoid Jake’s gaze and stuck close to Wei Lian. She barely touched her food though the dinner spread was delicious.

After dinner, they all gathered to play poker cards but Fang Qi decided to sit it out and watched them play instead. Wei Lian sniggered and commented loudly, “Wah the biggest gambler is beside me and she’s actually not playing! The world change already!”

“I don’t play, you very bored is it?” Fang Qi gritted her teeth and retorted, while glaring angrily at him.

“What la? Cannot ask ah? You like to gamble one what. Now don’t gamble, very weird what.” Wei Lian replied matter-of-factly.

As the bickering between Wei Lian and Fang Qi intensified, Jake felt uneasy in his heart. Jealousy. Somehow, he could feel some chemistry between Wei Lian and Fang Qi. To the onlookers, they may look like they hate each others’ guts to the core, but there seemed to be something more. He couldn’t quite explain the feeling but he hoped he was wrong. While playing cards, Jake could not help but corner Wei Lian all the time to quell his jealousy.

“Who wants to play mahjong? We short of one person lay,” Wei Lian’s auntie looked around the living room and asked. Fang Qi was the only person not doing anything.

The thought of mahjong made her fingers itch. She quickly volunteered herself to play against Wei Lian’s auntie and parents. Her luck was so good, she kept winning money and as she got more hyped up, her loud nature returned. She started giving tips to them on how to win her, what numbers to bet on for 4D and discussed the probability of winning, what’s the optimal amount to bet on and so on. She droned on so much that Wei Lian couldn’t take it anymore.

He covered his ears with his palms and screamed “Fang Qi! Are you still human??!!” Her gambling habits are just so crazily extreme that he is really baffled over it. How can a girl be like this? He regretted not throwing her out of the house and not stopping her from tagging along.

“What did you promised me hah? You said you will not disturb me or interfere in my stuff!” He immediately started to curse and swear saying he will make her quit her gambling habits and her loud and rough ways. “If I can’t make you change, my name is not Tan Wei Lian!” he proclaimed.

Wei Lian’s parents were shocked that their son was embarrassing himself in front of so many people screaming like a mad man, and scolded him. His mum walked over to him and gave him a slap on his arm. “Iyo boy ah! Why you so rude to our guest one? Your temper is so bad, for nothing shout and shout, where got girl will want you ah?” She took the opportunity to nag at Wei Lian, who purposely put on an expressionless look.

Fang Qi smirked quietly that Auntie sort of came to her rescue. She happily sat back to watch the show and laughed. Serves him right for being mean, she chuckled.

Just then, Wei Lian’s female cousin Jace arrived to join her brother, Jake. She has been smitten with Wei Lian since young and always liked to stick close to him. The worst thing is she is very “touchy-feely” towards Wei Lian all the time. Tonight was no exception. Wherever Wei Lian sat, Jace will follow and keep going near him. She even attempted to put her leg on his and tried to seduce him by running her stumpy fingers up and down his chest.

Wei Lian was angry and disgusted at being “molested” and told her off. “I yo, can you put away your fingers?”

“Cannot.” Jace replied.

“I ya, can you sit properly a not? Irritating leh!” He pushes away her legs.

“I ya don’t like that mah, I like you mah. You don’t know meh?” Jace kept taunting him.

“I ya, I don’t know la. No mood la. Stop touching la!” In the end, Wei Lian was so fed up that he got up abruptly to return to his room.

He walked near the mahjong table and felt for the chair nearest to him. He knew exactly where Fang Qi was sitting after the din she created earlier. He gave her hair a yank and mumbled.

“Eh you. Come with me, I want to scold you some more.” Then he dragged the bewildered Fang Qi into the room with him, to the shock of his on-looking family members.

“Eh you siao ah? I am winning liao leh! Pull me into your room for what la? You better pay me my losses!!” Fang Qi scolded Wei Lian. She knew he wanted to escape from his cousin. The sight of him struggling to avoid his cousin’s physical advances made her want to laugh out loud.

“Iya you go and take from Jake la! He won all my money lor!” he retorted. At the mention of Jake, Fang Qi fell silent. The whole night Jake has been casting long glances at her but she refused to meet them. She really didn’t know what to feel. She had been missing him for the past few years and yearned to be with him again but now that she sees him again, the hurt and pain he caused her resurfaces.

Wei Lian could sense that something was wrong. Ever since the day Fang Qi barged in on him and Jake at the beach house, she has been acting funny. And he noticed that each time in the presence of Jake or at the mention of Jake, Fang Qi clams up.

In fact, he couldn’t help but feel a certain sadness and helplessness in her when she clams up. Somehow, he suspects that this sadness has something to do with Jake. He was curious, but he certainly wasn’t going to ask her about it. Too bothersome.

“Eh. I can’t sleep leh.” Fang Qi pushed away the blanket and used her leg to kick Wei Lian who is sleeping on the floor.

“I yo, can you don’t anyhow kick or not?” Wei Lian turned and faced her direction. He said in a muffled manner.

“Cannot sleep.” She kicked again.

Wei Lian shifted again and pulled the blanket up. He turned his back against her and ignored her. “Go out and smoke la.”

“Don’t want.” Jake is staying in the same house. He will most probably be in the living room or garden.

“You scared of Jake issit?” Wei Lian tried to expose her. She forced me one, he thought. He hates to be disturbed when sleeping.

“Cannot sleep means cannot sleep. Where got so many afraid of this and that? Just don’t feel like smoking what, cannot meh??” She sat upright on the bed and glared angrily at the guy sleeping at the bedside.

“Then how? Go and bang the wall la. You surely will be able to sleep.” Wei Lian sighed and pulled his blanket over his head. Ha! Really too bad. He doesn’t usually use such mean words. But that is what people will get if they disturb him or give him an attitude.

“Eh!!” Fang Qi did not get any more responses from the guy who covered his head with a blanket. Furious, she slid back into her bed and tried to get to sleep.

Chapter 9

2006-02-18T22:53:00.000-08:00

“Guo Qu Zhong Zhong De Hui Yi, Jiu Xiang Ge Wu Di Dong, Rang Wo Shen Xian Qi Zhong”

Chapter 9

Meanwhile, Wei Lian had no choice but to allow Fang Qi to stay over at the beach house. “I like it here lay, cannot ah?” was her frequent retort. Cannot lor, he thought grudgingly, but he didn’t know how to chase her away. She is just so thick-skinned. And she is still so tight-lipped about why she is seeking refuge here, he gave up trying to find out from her. He had better things to do. He made her promise not to disturb him. As long as her presence doesn’t interfere with his song writing progress, he wasn’t going to bother too much.

It was a sunny yet breezy afternoon. Fang Qi has scooted off to the beach to get a suntan. Wei Lian sat on the sofa, his guitar snuggled close to himself. Finally some peace and quiet, he thought to himself, his fingers gently strumming some chords.

Before long, he was startled by the loud ringing tone of his handphone. “Private number”, the speech reader said. Wondering who it could be, he answered the phone. “Hello Wei Lian! It’s me ah, Jake. I’m back in Singapore. Where are you man?” “Wah you are finally back!” Wei Lian exclaimed. Jake is one of his closest cousins and they’ve been playmates since young. But Jake disappeared from Singapore four years ago, apparently due to some relationship problems. He has not told Wei Lian anything, and obviously Wei Lian wasn’t going to probe. Wei Lian told him that he was at his beach house, and Jake offered to come over to visit him, since he had also brought something back from overseas for him.

“Wah, not bad ah this place?” Jake walked around the beach house, admiring the cosy interior decorations. Wei Lian smiled. “Make yourself at home hor,” he gestured Jake towards the sofa and reached into the fridge for two packet drinks. He handed one to Jake and settled himself on the cool floor. The weather was too hot for him to be sitting on the sofa.

“So how come you decided to come back?” he asked Jake. “Well, I realised I missed everything back here lor. I miss you also ma, hahaha!” Jake slapped Wei Lian on his back playfully. The two cousins chatted like long-lost friends, catching up with what happened in the past few years.

“Waaaah!!!!!! So hot outside! I chao dar already!” Fang Qi barged into the house, squealing at the top of her voice. “Oei! You got any cold……..” Fang Qi suddenly stopped in her tracks. Silence. Jake? She couldn’t believe her eyes. She was too shocked to react. Jake was equally stunned. They both never expected to meet up again like that.

“Eh, why suddenly no sound? Became dumb liao ah?” Wei Lian sensed an awkward air in the room and he is a little puzzled. Fang Qi and Jake both cleared their throats uneasily. They both pretended that they did not know each other. “Iya you don’t disturb me la, I got visitor here. Go and eat dinner or do something else la. Bye!” Wei Lian didn’t bother introducing them to each other, and chased Fang Qi away. Fang Qi retreated a few steps, her gaze still on Jake, then turned and walked out of the beach house without another word. Wei Lian was baffled at Fang Qi’s sudden loss for words. Maybe she was shy because there was a stranger in the house. Huh, shy?! Err, oh well, whatever la, he could not be bothered with her. “Eh, let’s go for seafood at the restaurant nearby ok? Hungry already.” he suggested to Jake, who was strangely quiet as well.

The beach house was quiet that night as Wei Lian walked back to the beach house after dinner with Jake, who had excused himself saying he had to rush home. For the past few nights, Fang Qi has been blasting the TV so loudly that Wei Lian had to threaten to throw her out if she didn’t lower the volume. But tonight, the TV wasn’t turned on. Was she even in the house? Wei Lian pushed open the door and felt for the light switch. It was turned on.

“Wah somebody tonight very quiet lay. So rare, I can go and buy 4D already.” Wei Lian joked sarcastically. No response. “Haha I know liao, must be you talked too much until your mouth is tired.” Still no response. Weird. “Eh, you fainted ah?”

“Iya, sleeping liao la,” came a reluctant reply and Wei Lian heard her pull the blanket, probably over her head. He shrugged his shoulders. This girl is just weird. But he decided to keep quiet and not probe further. That’s not his style anyway. After a few days of interaction with Fang Qi, he roughly knew her mentality. If she wanted to tell him what happened, she will tell him voluntarily. There is no need for him to ask. He retrieved his guitar, turned off the lights and went out to the porch to continue working on his song.

Two days later, Wei Lian received a call from his mother asking him to go back for dinner as he hasn’t been home for quite a few days. When Fang Qi overheard his conversation she wanted to tag along.

“I ya, let me follow la, very boring lor stay here.” Fang Qi tugged at the long sleeve of his striped shirt.

“I ya, bring me along will die meh? Your parents won’t be mistaken I am your girlfriend also what. So scared meh?” she challenged.

Actually she wanted to tag along because she is afraid that Jake will come and look for her at the beach house. The other day when he was here, he looked at her with shock. She knew he would be back anytime as he did not call or question her ever since he left. She does not want to risk seeing him alone. She missed him so much yet she doesn’t know how to deal with facing him. She thickened her skin and turned to harassing Wei Lian as a last resort.

“Eh you can don’t keep pulling or not?” Wei Lian couldn’t stand her harassing anymore.

“I ya can la, can la, you let me follow you la ok?” Fang Qi decided for him.

“You said you like the beach house. Since you find it boring now, you leave la.” Wei Lian brushed her hands away and tried to walk past the makeshift dinning table but she stopped him. She hugged his arm, much to his resistance, and stared at him. “You are afraid people will be mistaken issit? Or you got something to hide?” she asked, all the while glaring at him.

“I ya you don’t bo liao la.” came Wei Lian’s curt reply.

“Then???” her voice raised by ten decibels. Iya whatever. Wei Lian wrestled his arm out of hers and walked out of the house. Fang Qi happily followed behind.

“Eh, you only child ah? You how old ah? What you work as one ah? You always hold the guitar and strum, looking for inspiration is it? Like that strum strum strum you will get inspiration ah?……”

Along the way, for the past one hour, Wei Lian was subjected to the bombarding of questions from Fang Qi.

“………….” Hai!

“………” Huh?

“………” What is she asking?

“………Hana hana ...” he answered for the sake of answering

“…….stop pulling me lay! Why you keep pushing over?” he pushes away her shoulder and listened to the messages coming into his handphone.

It’s not really Fang Qi’s intention to keep poking at Wei Lian, but she just couldn’t help but to irritate him. Every time she opens her mouth, she just feels like picking a squabble or quarrel with him. At least he was a worthy opponent, she chuckled subconsciously.

Chapter 8

2006-02-18T04:32:00.000-08:00

"Ni Shi Zhong Mei Li Kai Guo Wo De Xin, Wo Ai Ni, Ni Dong Bu Dong?"

Chapter 8

A fragrant aroma filled the air. The smell of eggs and cup noodles. Err…eggs and cup noodles?! Wei Lian sat upright on his bed immediately and faced the direction of the makeshift table in the middle of the room. He was stunned for a while and realized someone was slurping very loudly. Slurping on food. Fried eggs and cup noodles. He is sure.

Fang Qi sat on the chair with one foot on the chair itself. She was slurping down the noodles from the Nissin cup noodles and her other hand with a metal fork, poking at the eggs she had just fried. Looking up at the guy who had just woke up from his sleep, she took another mouthful of noodles before continuing. “Wake up liao ah? Not bad leh, you can sleep quite long lor. I just fried some eggs and made some cup noodles. Seafood flavor. I found them in the cupboard and fridge lor.”

Wei Lian, still in his sleepy state, shuffled his feet towards the table. Fang Qi got up from her chair and pressed him down onto the seat. She walked towards the cupboard and opened the cupboard door, peering inside. “Wah, only left Tom Yam flavour. Can la hor?”

Without even waiting for an answer, she ripped the plastic off the cup noodles and started to pour hot water into the cup. She pushed the cup of noodles and a plate of fried eggs in front of Wei Lian and thrusted a pair of chopsticks into his hands. Wei Lian was too stunned for words all this while. He didn’t know what to do or say. This girl invaded his private space, made herself comfortable on his sofa and now she is serving him breakfast in his house. What is this??

“Eat lay, waiting for what? Waiting for dinnertime ah? Now only three plus in the afternoon la, you later then eat ah? Don’t tell me I must feed you lor.” Fang Qi joked.

Wei Lian said nothing. What can he say? He poked the chopsticks into the cup of noodles and began eating. Three plus in the afternoon. He slept that long? This is the longest sleep he ever had in the past few months. He thought quietly inside him. Suddenly he remembered something, “Eh, you planning to stay how long?”
His tone suggested frustration.

“I ya I tell you already what. I wont disturb you one what. I just dun want to go home cannot is it?” Fang Qi poured herself a glass of water and gulped down at one go.

Won’t disturb? Her presence is disturbing enough lor. This is him. He just cannot tolerate just anyone intruding into his life. It has become a practice for him to guard against people somehow. It is a form of his life and he doesn’t like just about anyone from the streets to come and intrude into his life.

“You don’t happen to be running away from loan sharks do you?” Wei Lian asked straightforwardly. Remembering the fact that she is a big time gambler, as described by Jason, what else would she be running away from? Other than owing the loan sharks money, he seriously couldn’t think of any other reasons.

The water Fang Qi just gulped down choked her. “Pu!! Er…” She coughed hard and tried to smooth the uneasy feeling in her chest from the choking.

Fang Qi rolled her eyes. Of course she didn’t owe anyone money. Her savings is more than enough to live off comfortably without working for a few years. Besides, mum left behind a huge sum of money for them when she passed on.

She had sneaked out of her room at daybreak and wandered in the streets before deciding to come to the beach house. She didn’t know where to go. She doesn’t want anyone to know where she is. Out of boredom and also curiosity, she had sent out an sms to Jake’s old number. She couldn’t bear to delete away his number. Very often, she would stare at his number.

“Where are you? When will you be back? Are you fine? I missed you….” She typed.

“Soon. Next week.” That was the reply that came after a one hour-long silence.

Soon. Next week. That is too fast for her to react. Jake is coming back next week. She couldn’t handle the truth.

“Eh.” No response from her. Wei Lian’s gaze met the air.

“I ya. Here la.” She snapped her fingers. Wei Lian followed the direction of her voice and turned to face her. “Ha! Don’t worry, I didn’t owe anyone money so I wont drag you down la. I just can’t think of anywhere to go but here.”

“Y?” He is puzzled.

“Y? Because I have nowhere else to go la.” She quipped, at the same time gobbled the last bit of her noodles and drank the soup base.

Better dun have anything to do with this girl! Women are nothing but trouble! They only know how to harass him and give him trouble! Once they know that he can do a lot of things more than what the normal people could do, they tend to take advantage of him and try to cover up their intentions by giving excuses for liking him. Except for Cherie. Wei Lian thought inside himself quietly.

Fang Qi. A girl whom he met four times but yet, all four times came across like a disaster to him. He never knew she is his buddy’s sister but he heard that his sister is a sweet girl. Err…but the way he knows her, she certainly doesn’t seem like one. More like a compulsive gambler and drinker. What happened to her, he never really know. Guess Fang Tong gave up asking and talking about her to others.

Hai! Whatever, since she want to stay for a few days, so be it la. Cannot be bothered. She is tight-lipped and determined to keep mum about why she ended up at his doorstep. Ask more also no use la. She better dun come and trouble him or disturb him. If not, if not….. “Ya what?” He came out of his thoughts.

“I asking if you got extra clothing and towel la.” Fang Qi yawned lazily and stretched her limbs.

Huh? Clothing? She wants to borrow clothing too?? I ya whatever. “Eh, u never bring your own clothes meh?”

“If I brought I still need to borrow for what?” Fang Qi looked at him with a “you- purposely-ask-the-obvious-is-it?” look. Her face is painted with the expression, “You kiam pa ah?”

“Eh, can you don’t be so rough anot? You behave like a boy you know.” Wei Lian really cannot stand her behaviour and dissed her directly.

Without waiting for him to say another word, Fang Qi has already made her way to the wardrobe, opened the wardrobe door and peered inside. Her hand flipped through the row of clothing hung on the rack and stopped. She turned and stared at the guy who is facing her direction. She made a funny face at him. She heard from Fang Tong that he has been visually impaired since he was born.

“Eh, you don’t keep on eh eh me can a not? You don’t know my name meh?” she asked with impatience.

“Huh? Why should I know what is your name lay? You also eh eh eh me what.” Wei Lian felt his way to the sofa and picked his guitar up. He strummed it softly and tried to fine-tune the guitar. Hai! Too bad, this is what you get when you disturb my peace and quiet. He quietly smirked inside him but his look of indifference angered Fang Qi.

“Ai shi ni yan li ....OEI!” He sang softly but stopped and let out a muffled groan when he felt someone stomping on his left feet.

“Eh! Eh! Eh!!! I eh eh eh you because I don’t remember your name what.” Fang Qi challenged him.

“I also eh eh eh you because I don’t remember what.” Wei Lian threw her words back at her. Actually he knows her name, but he is just not used to calling people by their names. Especially not in a situation like what he and Fang Qi are in. He really can’t tolerate this type of girls. Bad attitude plus rude. One word - Bad. Towards such people, he just can’t help making a dig at her.

“Eh. Can you move aside ah? I want to do my things.” His tone showed impatience. He waited for a while but could not hear any reaction from her. ‘Oei.” Suddenly he heard no one.

“Eh, this girl is the one you love is it?” Silence broke when Fang Qi peered closely at the yellowed photographs that were slid under the panel of glass on the small coffee table and questioned Wei Lian.

“But this photograph is so old lor. Which one is you ah? Wah, these are newer.” Fang Qi scrutinized the photographs. There are dates on each of the photos. She turned back and found Wei Lian sitting there with an indifferent expression again. He was holding his guitar strumming softly again, his face turned away from her direction.

“Oei, stoning ah?” She kicked his leg. He shifted, uncomfortable that she mentioned Cherie. “Wah, you looked so toot last time lor. Now more good- looking.” She assumed the identity of the two guys and a girl in the photographs. The girl smiled happily with the other guy; therefore the other guy is Wei Lian, for in some of the photos his gaze never met the camera.

“Err..Cherie?” Fang Qi mumbled under her breath. She was looking at one of the pictures. It was dated 20 June 2001.

Huh? Cherie? Wei Lian stopped strumming the guitar strings. His palm hit the guitar surface. She knows Cherie? He doesn’t remember there are any names on the photographs. As far as he knew.

“Cherie is the girl you like ah?” Fang Qi looked at him with annoyance. She hates it when she asks so many questions and there is no response. It’s like talking to the wall.

A look of pain flashed across his face. Fang Qi caught it and got up from the floor. “But she loves the other guy right? The one whom I saw you with at the cafe the other time.” She couldn’t help but continue probing despite seeing his forlorn expression. Hai! Another love-smitten guy! She thought.

She had known Cherie from school. They shared the same classes for psychology in school. She didn’t talk to her often, but she had heard that she had two guy buddies from young and they studied in the same school. And all she could last remember was that she and Cherie both left school at the same time. That was the year Jake left her.

She could tell that Wei Lian is wondering how come she knew Cherie. But she did not intend to tell him. Lazy lah. She felt it a chore to explain things. She grabbed a shirt and a pair of khaki pants and strolled to the bathroom. Hearing Fang Qi walk away, Wei Lian went back to his guitar strumming. “Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge……” He sang softly.

Chapter 7

2006-02-17T20:48:00.000-08:00

"Liang Ke Ji Mo De Xin, Xin Zhong Que Ge Zi Shang Bei…"

Chapter 7

Two lonely persons, one kind of feeling.

Fang Qi tossed and turned in her warm blankets. She missed the guy who tucked her into bed every night and told her how much he loves her as she felt his warm big hands on hers.

Where is he now? Jake..Jake…her mind ran wild with thoughts. She wished that he were here with her right now. Since the day he left, she still could not make herself forget him despite the pain he had caused her. Even till now. So where is he now? Is he also thinking of her in a faraway country from Singapore? Perhaps. Perhaps not. She smiled bitterly to herself as she turned to face the cold wooden floor, dragging her fingers up and down in vertical motion on the floor. Coldness hit and triggered the numbness of her fingers.

Against the first sign of daybreak, her mouth uttered a word. “Jake.” All she could say was his name. Jake. She couldn’t bear to sleep. Or rather, she couldn’t get to sleep. No matter how warm her blankets are, they can never be compared to the warmth Jake gave her. She loves him yet she can’t be with him.

Ha! What a life?

Wei Lian opens his eyes and pushes away the thick blanket from his body. The cold wind made the wind chimes hanging by the windows chirp and clatter. He sits upright against the wall and listens to the soft music the wind chime is creating.

“Ding, ding, ding….” The tingling melody against the cold and windy weather is soothing to his ears. Is it raining outside again? Somehow, rainy nights seem to calm his senses and strangely inspire him.

“Dunno can write my song or not?” He stoned for a while and decided to get out of bed after all. He has not been able to sleep well lately. The usual nagging feeling surfaced in his heart again. Though he could not see, he quietly wished that daybreak would come soon.

He picked up his guitar from beside the bed, and began strumming a few chords. He started to work on his unfinished song. In the wee hours of the morning, his inspiration was running high. As the sun-rays glowed upon daybreak, Wei Lian finally completed the new song. He hears birds chirping outside. He felt his way from the edge of the bed, along the soft paddings he had fixed on the walls all the way to the window and pushed open the closed window. A moist woody smell greeted him.

It’s morning, he realized. He could feel the faint touch of warmth from the sunlight on the back of his hand.

Knock knock! Wei Lian heard a loud knock on the door. He raised his eyebrow with frustration. Who is that so early in the morning? His fingers quickly opened the flap of his Braille watch and felt the tiny Braille dots on the watch surface. 7.15am!! Err..who is that lay?

He opened the door and heard a female voice. The female voice said, “Can I stay here for a few days?”

“Huh?” He was sure he didn’t hear wrongly. It’s the same voice that he remembered hearing. Fang Qi.

“I am saying can I stay here for a few days?” the voice said again.

“Can I say no a not?” he held onto the door, afraid that she will just dash in suddenly.

“Cannot. Let me stay here for a few days, I don’t want to go home.” Fang Qi looked at him through the partially closed door.

“But you don’t want to go home like not my business lay?” Wei Lian replied in an impatient tone.

Before Wei Lian could react, Fang Qi pushed the door open and slipped into the house. “Let me stay a few days, I will leave you alone. I won’t disturb you. I will leave soon.” She plonked herself down onto the sofa and said.

“Eh, you…” Wei Lian was thrown off for a while and then he turned in the direction of the sofa.

“Eh.” No response. “Eh!!!”

“I sleep for a while” Fang Qi mumbled out of frustration and grabbed a soft cushion, burying her face into it.

Huh? What’s wrong with this woman? He and she hardly know each other and all they knew about each other is that they have started off on a wrong note right from the beginning. All he knows is that this girl is his good friend’s sister. Hai! Whatever la, let her sleep first. He will think of what to do with her when he wakes up later. He felt weird with someone suddenly intruding into his own privacy. But he was seriously tired. Without thinking too much, he felt his way back to the bed and fell into deep sleep.

Chapter 6

2006-02-17T01:33:00.000-08:00

"Zhe Li You Zhe Wo Men De Hui Yi, Bu Ke Wang Shen Me, Zhi Xi Wang Neng Yong Yuan Shou Hu Zhe Ni, Jiu Suan Ni De Xin Bu Shu Yu Wo, Wo Ye Wu Yuan Wu Hui"

Chapter 6

Aww..pain! Splitting headache. How many times has she woken up feeling like her head is going to explode? As she rolled over to the other side of the bed and tried to get up, her fingers felt a long bottle on top of the untouched blanket. She picks it up and hold on to it, making her way to the kitchen with unstable steps. She threw the beer bottle into the rubbish bin.

As she clumsily pours herself a glass of water to quench her thirst, she heard a voice calling her from behind. “Tsk tsk tsk, I say mei ah, how much ruder can you get lor. Luckily my friend cannot see, if not, I think you would have scared the wits out of him lor.” Fang Tong pointed to his twin sister’s messy bird-nest-hair and crumpled clothes. “What la?” Fang Qi turned back and snapped in an irritated tone, her hands still holding the glass of water that she is trying to down.

Eh…this voice? Wei Lian was surprised to hear a familar voice. “I say my friend is here. Don’t be rude, call people.” Fang Tong shook his head in disbelief that her sister has actually gotten herself into such a messy state. “Where la?” Fang Qi did not see anyone around. “Ok, here. Wei Lian.” He stepped aside and revealed the guy who has been standing behind them for quite a while. Wei Lian listened to their conversation and replied, “Oh, ya? Hello hello?”

“Hello?” Fang Qi took a step closer and peered at the guy in front of him intently. Huh?! Him again? This time she does not need to ask him if he was the blind guy who crossed her path several times. She scrutinized him from head to toe and then again from toe to head, her hands grabbing the glass of water tightly, and then finally down the water with a big gulp. “You again ah?”

“Ah.” Wei Lian managed a short and curt reply, his gaze once again not meeting hers. “Oh.” Fang Qi dumped the empty glass into her brother’s hands and walked out of the kitchen. “Oei, so rude!” Fang Tong grumbled after her.

“Eh, you know her meh?” He turned and asked Wei Lian, still in disbelief that his sister just walked away like that. “Dunoe la. I where dare to la?” Wei Lian purposely said loudly. A resounding ‘OEI!” was the reply to his answer.

Wei Lian lugged his guitar case with him and stood in front of the back door of the beach house. There he is again. One more week and Cherie will be back. She still hasn’t called them. He inserted the keys into the keyhole and turned the knob. An empty feeling greeted him. No warmth, no laughter, nothing. Only loneliness and emptiness. “Hello?” He said loudly. A soft echo replied him with a “Hello”. He smirked sadly to himself.

Everyone he knows has been busy. Jason has been working through the holidays to clinch a deal while he himself has become a partner of the café where he used to sing. Granny Gin, the owner of the café, wished for a semi-retired life but there was no one to take over her business. As she has always doted on Wei Lian, she wanted him to have a secured future. Therefore, she made him inherit half of her café business. After busying himself with work for the past week, he finally decided to take a break this week. Until Cherie comes back.

Together with a small backpack of fresh clothes for changing, he lugged all his song writing equipment to the beach house. The beach house holds a lot of happy and sad memories for him. He had forked out money to buy the lovely beach house from the previous owner. Understanding that Wei Lian is buying the little beach house because he knew Cherie would come back here one day, the owner had sold to him at a very cheap price. Now, he hopes to find some inspiration for a new song here.

Chapter 5

2006-02-16T21:48:00.000-08:00

"Zai San De Xie Hou Hui Ling Shi Jie Ting Dun, Hai Shi Yi Wei Zhe Yuan Fen De Kai Shi?"

Chapter 5

Fang Qi wandered around aimlessly until she came to a crowded café. The quaint décor attracted her inside but it was so packed with patrons that the waitress had to usher her outdoors. She asked if she mind sharing a table with others. “Iya heck la, my legs are so tired, whatever la,” she thought to herself and allowed herself to be led to a table already occupied by two guys.

Wei Lian and Jason were deep in conversation when Fang Qi appeared at their table. The waitress asked them if they mind sharing their table. Before they could even respond, Fang Qi had already plonked herself down on the empty seat and started flipping the menu. Jason glared at her then turned to Wei Lian, who had a puzzled look on his face. They were both thinking that this girl is really quite rude but decided to just ignore her.

Wei Lian had just finished his performance at the café and was sharing a chat with Jason and reminiscing about the past and the things that they had enjoyed doing. All of a sudden, they were reminded of Cherie again. Jason and Wei Lian both smiled. But their smiles were that of pain and sadness. Jason’s smile was more obvious than Wei Lian’s as Wei Lian did not want Jason to find out about his feelings for Cherie. He was already so used to bottling all his feelings within himself.

All this while, Fang Qi was listening in to their conversation. She couldn’t help it because they were talking quite loudly. In their momentary pause, she looked up and saw their pained smiles; she couldn’t help interrupting their conversation while still scribbling away furiously on the lottery paper the lucky numbers she was going to buy.

“Wah, mister, why are you looking more miserable than the other guy who loves the girl? Actually it is you who love the girl a lot right?” she gestured at Wei Lian. She had caught the look of tremendous pain in his eyes from a brief glance. Jason and Wei Lian were both stunned by the sudden intrusion.

Jason looked up at the girl with curiosity and was stumped by the stack of lottery papers and numbers scribbled on pieces of blank paper all over the table. Wah big time gambler ah? He thought. She was nibbling playfully at the top of the pen she was holding. She took a sip of her iced fruit tea and slammed the glass back onto the glass table with a loud clank.

Wei Lian, being unable to see, kept mum right from the start. He was angry that someone he didn’t know could actually see through him. He somehow felt uncomfortable with the girl’s remarks and wanted to get out of the café very badly.

As he awkwardly stood up suddenly, just as the girl was putting down her glass, his glass of milk tea overturned and the tea spilt onto the front of his shirt. Jason being the normally jovial and good-tempered guy finally snapped and told the girl off.

She had not only interrupted their chat but also upset the glass of milk tea. “Eh, Miss. Miss Gambler ah, don’t you think you should apologize ah?” Not knowing her name, Jason took the opportunity to take a dig at her. The girl ignored him and continued doing her stuff---shading the number combinations off the pieces of crisp betting paper. Jason fumed.

“Wei Lian, eh, you okay?” Jason passed him some tissues. “I ya, okay la, nothing much la.” Wei Lian said as he wiped away the drops of cold milk tea on his hand. But he was thinking to himself, “This girl is damn rude man. Better don’t let me run into her again…”

Two days later, Wei Lian was back at the same café whiling his time away before his next performance at Jose’s Place Café. He was enjoying his time alone when someone just plonked down next to him in the tiny booth he was occupying.

“Eh? You again ah! Sorry ah…” the girl exclaimed and trailed off. All Wei Lian could hear was ruffling of paper and sounds of pencil against the paper.

“Not again.” he thought. How many times is he going to meet this clumsy and rude girl? This time round, WL prepared himself well. He quickly held on to his glass of drink and removed all his stuff from the table in case she dirties them again.

Luckily this time he was unscathed, and he left without a word when it was time for him to go. The girl was too pre-occupied with her betting slips and did not even notice his departure.

On the way to Jose’s Place Café, Wei Lian received a call from a close friend of theirs. Cherie is coming back. This friend happened to bump into Cherie’s mother recently and found out. She hasn’t called them yet. Is she still thinking of Jason or is she just afraid of meeting him again? He does not know. Yet he could not contain his excitement despite the uncertainties that lay ahead. He can’t wait to hear Cherie’s voice again.

After his stint at the café that very day, Wei Lian headed for the beach house. News of Cherie returning to Singapore somehow made him eager to visit the beach house. Ever since Cherie left, he has been coming to this beach house at least once every week to relax. He loves the feeling of freedom and enjoys listening to the sea breeze and water lashing against the sea rocks. He loves the quietness surrounding him.

As he came in through the back door and into the living room, he thought he heard someone weeping. Who is that? No one else comes here anymore except for Jason and him. And of course Cherie, before she left. He is sure what he heard was a female crying voice, no matter how muffled the sobs are. But that can’t be Cherie. She is only coming back two weeks later. Who is that?

He followed the weeping voice and came to the main door leading to the front porch. He feels for the door-knob and opened the front door. “Hello? Is there someone crying out there?” he asked, half his body out of the house.

The startled girl stopped sobbing and looked up at the sudden intruder. “Err..who are you?” she asked.

“This is my beach house lor. Who are you ah? Why are you hiding here and crying?” Wei Lian answered matter-of-factly.

“Er…I didn’t know this place is occupied…” the girl stared at the guy whose gaze did not meet hers while he was speaking the whole time. She wiped away her tears furiously and tried to pick her weak body up. She has been crying so much that she felt so feeble.

“Err..you look quite familiar? Have I seen you somewhere before?”

“Eh, you sound familiar leh, we talked before is it?”

Both of them asked at the same time.

Wei Lian is very sure he can’t be wrong. He has heard this voice somewhere, somehow, but he just can’t remember exactly where he heard it. He is proud of his excellent memory as he can remember lots of details. After a moment of silence, it struck him. “Eh, you… you don’t happen to be that one who likes to gamble is it?”

“Huh?!” Before the girl could start to think where else she could have met this guy, Wei Lian stumped her with his fast reaction. “You mean you…are that blind guy?!” No wonder she thought she found him familiar. Realizing this guy was the same one whom she met twice in a row in three days, she sprung to her feet and wanted to leave. She had scolded and quarreled with this guy twice and now that he has caught her in this pathetic state, all she wanted to do now is to leave immediately.

“Oh, you are really that girl ah?” Wei Lian didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Instead, he just stood there and waited. His face remained indifferent. Realizing that she had revealed her identity, her face flushed furiously. “Ya whatever. Can you leave me alone?”

“Huh? I was actually thinking of coming here to relax lor, and I thought it is you who came and hide in my front porch to cry hor.” Weilian answered her back swiftly before realizing it. “You cry what ah?” Wei Lian continued asking in his usual fast speed.

Hearing what he asked, the girl’s tears came streaming down her cheeks again, this time more furiously than before. The girl’s sobs just grew uncontrollably louder.

“Eh…can you don’t cry or not ah?” Wei Lian was a little stunned by her reaction. He didn’t know how to react. All he could manage was that sentence. “Eh…I ya, whatever.” He gave up. He is already confused enough himself and has no energy to bother about other people’s matters now.

As he turned to enter the house, he heard the girl pick herself up and ran down the porch onto the sandy pathway, still sobbing. He heaved a sigh and closed the door.

Chapter 4

2006-02-15T23:48:00.000-08:00

"Si Nian Jiu Xiang Nao Hai Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge, Yong Yuan Ye Chang Bu Wan, Yong Yuan Mei You Ju Dian"

Chapter 4

Four years later.

“Hi Wei Lian, I think your songs are really nice you know. I hope to be able to hear your songs on radio one day.” A regular patron at the Jose’s Place Café pats Wei Lian on the shoulders as he passes his song dedications forms to him.

Wei Lian just smiled and uttered thanks softly as he sat on the high stool. His fingers lightly brushes against the guitar strings and strummed softly.

“Wei Lian, can you sing us that song? The one you always sing? We haven’t heard it from you tonight.” Another table of café patrons requested.

Wei Lian’s long fingers continued to strum lightly against the guitar strings. That song.. Wei Lian smiled again. The song that he had sang for Cherie.

During the past four years, Wei Lian has been continuing his street-busking as well as performances at the café. From the day Cherie left, he started to sing the song he had initially written for the competition, and it has now become a regular song in his repertoire.

Deep in his heart, he has been hoping that Cherie will come by one day and hear him sing the song again. Whenever he skips this song, his ardent supporters will ask him why he is not singing it and will thereafter request for it. He has never told anyone the story behind the song. But those who listened to the song could feel that there is a sad past behind it, for he always returned their questions about the song with a gentle, wistful smile and doesn’t say a word more about it.

Each time he sings that song, he is bound to feel a rush of emotions. The bittersweet feeling is indescribable. It’s been so long since Cherie left but his feelings for her have never once waned. The nagging question of whether he should have told her how he felt towards her lingers in his heart. He treasured her too much to lose her friendship.

He still remembers clearly the day when Cherie left because of Jason. Jason had known that Cherie was leaving and he had actually rushed to the airport too, only to find a dejected and red-eyed Wei Lian. Wei Lian refused to tell Jason anything about what had happened. Struggling to accept the fact that Cherie had left, Wei Lian could only bring himself to say to Jason, “She loves you a lot.”

The shocked Jason finally realized the aching pain that he had constantly felt. He thought that he had loved his current girlfriend, Theresa. But in actual fact, his deep feelings for Jessica had gradually switched to being placed on Cherie. He had tried to shake it off as just buddy love. Never did he imagine that the feeling he felt is actually his love for Cherie. He thought that perhaps he had missed Jessica so much that he subconsciously treated Cherie as a substitute. To avoid that, he had gone on to woo Theresa. Now that Cherie is gone, he finally realized his true feelings.

Shortly after, Jason broke up with Theresa and never had another girlfriend ever since. He has been waiting for Cherie to come back. He was totally unaware that Wei Lian also loves Cherie and is missing her dearly too. Since that day, Cherie has not gotten in touch with both of them and they had no idea where she has gone. They can only wait…

One warm afternoon at Jose’s Place Café. “Wei Lian, can you sing Chu Mo for us please?” A regular audience requested from where she was seated. Wei Lian obliged with a smile and started to strum the intro of the song.

Out on the streets, a girl was strolling along with her hands in her jeans pockets, deep in thoughts. As she walked past the café, she heard someone singing and was immediately captivated. The voice was rich and brimming with emotions. The melody and lyrics seemed to be painting a sad story. A story like hers.

Listening to the song made her recall her past relationship. The memories started flooding back. She remembered the guy who had hurt her greatly. The guy who had taught her how to love and then cold-heartedly left her behind in Singapore without a word. He had left the country one day and called back to tell her that he wanted a breakup, because his mum did not approve of her, the reason being her cheerfulness did not fit into their family. “Fang Qi, stop thinking of him!” she chided herself in her head.

Since then, she hardly put on a smile and completely hides her cheerfulness. The blow had been too big for her. The betrayal was too hurtful. She loved him so much and this is what she got in return. Her character took a 360-degree turn for the worse and she became a strong-headed, rebellious and short-tempered girl, acquiring bad habits like gambling and picking quarrels with others.

Disillusioned with what happened, she took a two-year long break and decided to continue with the degree that she had given up after the broken relationship. Finally she completed her studies at the University and today was actually her graduation day.

She had slipped out after the graduation ceremony and strolled along the streets adjacent to the university. As the song “Chu Mo” came to an end, she stood there for a while before continuing down the streets.

At the back of her mind, she found the singer’s voice very familiar. But somehow she just can’t place the voice. Little did she know it was the visually handicapped busker she had ran into four years back. The one who sang “Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge” for her during the lowest point in her life.

A note from the I Love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong team

2006-02-15T07:52:00.000-08:00

A note from the I Love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong team

Some of you must be wondering, why all of a sudden there is such a story, and why these people can be so free as to come up with it.

Well, this story started off as just a joke among the few writers on an msn chat one night. Talk of a story featuring Wei Lian began when one of us checked a fan fiction website which was accessed regularly.

“Eh, how come no one wrote about Wei Lian leh?” All of us asked the same question.

“Well, not sure leh. No one write, then we write la!” One of us retorted.

“Ah. Okay lor.” All of us answered in unison.

And there you have it, his very own fan fiction. I Love U, Ni Dong Bu Dong? Simply put, it means I Love You, Do You Know?

The storyline was conceptualized after many brainstorming sessions over msn in the wee hours of the morning. We wanted to write something touching, heartwarming, yet hilarious at the same time, so that the readers will be fully entertained, as well as to portray Wei Lian as a all-rounder, in terms of capabilities and emotions.

Of course, we don’t claim to know Wei Lian’s real character, that’s why this is called a fan fiction - everything is fictitious. But if you still choose to fall deeper in love with Wei Lian, we can’t really help you then! Hehe.

In our daily lives, we are so caught up with our work and other stuff that we seldom have the time to stop and think about our loved ones. We assume that they will always be there for us. We take them for granted. And many of us actually don't like to vocalize our feelings. We tend to keep them all inside us and perhaps only display them through actions.

As for the title, it stemmed from a coincidental chance upon the lyrics of an unpublished song without melody. I still remember how the lyrist had painted a picture of his love experience.

Indeed, many a times, humans are sensitive and indecisive. Especially when it comes to love. While some may not believe it, many of us tend to be a freedom lover and a strong person. Sometimes we are shy and reserved. Thus when it comes to love, we shut ourselves off. It's difficult to win our hearts because we have decided to keep our feelings deep inside. We see the world as it is, not as we believe it should be. Who doesn’t long for love? In actual fact, we all do, undeniably.

And “I Love You, Ni Dong Bu Dong” - a poignant title exuding what is but a sincere yearning of a guy and a girl for the one they love, to make known their feelings for each other.

A simple yet heartfelt question, as if reassuring the other party of your deep love.

Please bear with us, as the story can get quite long sometimes. Can’t help it, as the ideas just happen to flow like water on some nights. On other nights, we get writers’ block and end up chatting instead. Haha.

In any case, it is heartening to see so many good comments on the tag board. Do feel free to email us at iluvu_nidongbudong@yahoo.com if you have any comments or feedback.

We hope that you have enjoyed what we have done so far. Will there be more surprises ahead? Will it be a happy ending? Who is going to end up with who? Stay tuned to watch the twists and turns as the story unfolds. In the meantime, wo men hui jia you de. Thanks! Haha!

Lots of love,
The team of I luv U, ni dong bu dong.

Chapter 3

2006-02-14T19:39:00.000-08:00

You xie shi, ruo bu shuo, hui bu hui cheng wei yong yuan de yi han?
dan shuo le, you hui bu hui cheng wei yong yuan de shang tong?

Chapter 3

Darkness. Wei Lian removed the soft pillow from under his resting head and sat upright. Freezing. In the darkness, he allowed his hands to freely sweep across the medium-height red mahogany study table beside his bed. His sensitive long fingers ran past the flat wooden top that supported his desktop, hi-fi system and other recording systems. He dislikes the hot and sticky feeling while sleeping and had turned the air-con to full-blast. He is accustomed to the coldness of the air-con. But it is freezing now.

Remote control. Where is it? He held on to his pillow and got up from the queen-sized bed. Feeling the edges of the study table, he made his way to the large bookcase beside it. “Can’t be I place the remote control on the shelves what..” Both his hands ran across the huge Braille books on the bookcase. Having said so, his right leg suddenly felt a hard object on the floor.

Oh, the remote control. He bent down to pick up the remote control, which had fallen from the study table. He quickly turned off the whirring air-con and a sudden silence fills his room. Pitter patter pitter patter…..”Oh, it’s raining outside! No wonder it’s so cold tonight la.” Wei Lian thought.

Suddenly, he had an urge to feel the coldness outside. With familiar motion, he pushed open the window at his bedside and stretches out his hand. The cold rain fell mercilessly on his outstretched hand. Ironically, it felt strangely comforting. Irony. His life is full of ironies. He can make good music but he can’t win the competitions. He can communicate well and is popular with girls but people think he is a player. He cares a lot for the people in his life but he never says it out. He loves Cherie but she loves his best friend. He……

Wei Lian snapped out of his thoughts. Suddenly, he had inspiration and decided to continue writing his song. Swiftly, he switched on his laptop and retrieved the document he was working on. Then he unzipped his guitar case for his guitar. Sitting down at the piano, he started to alternate between tinkering on the keyboard and plucking the guitar strings. His room was sound proof so he wasn’t afraid of waking his family up in the middle of the night.

Against the soft pattering of the rain outside, his handphone rang loudly. His fingers that were gently plucking the guitar chords stopped abruptly. “I yo who is calling me now?? 2.30am already leh.”, he wondered aloud, a little displeased that his train of thoughts had been shaken.

He picked up the phone to listen to the speech reader, which read out Jason’s name. “Hello…..yah why?” They never introduced themselves when they called each other. The familiarity is already there. “Eh, buddy, sorry to call you so late lah, but I just want to share some good news with you. Theresa agreed to be my girlfriend finally!” Jason gushed. Wei Lian pretended not to know anything as he had promised Cherie not to breathe a single word of what had happened this afternoon at the beach house, even though he really had the urge to say something.

“Haha good lo, you happy la?” That was all Wei Lian could manage. “Must thank Cherie for her help and ideas lor. She is solid man. Oh by the way do you know what’s wrong with her ah? She has been looking really spaced out recently.” Jason cannot help but think that Cherie must be troubled with something somehow and thought that maybe Wei Lian might know. “Wah, beats me man. You ask her yourself tomorrow lor, Ok gotta sleep. See you tomorrow.” With that they ended the call.

Just as Wei Lian hangs up, the phone rang again. It is Cherie this time. She couldn’t sleep. And from the tone of her voice, it was obvious she has been crying again. Wei Lian did not know what to do with her. “You want to go for supper or not? I can’t sleep also anyway.”, he offered. He wanted to go over to her house to look for her and keep her company but he could not bring himself to tell her that, but instead, used supper as an excuse. “No thanks, I really need to be alone at the moment. But I just want to chat for a while. Somehow chatting with you makes me feel better, maybe it’s because you are the only one who knows my secret.” Cherie lamented. After a short chat, they hung up and Wei Lian went back to work hard on his song.

A few days later, Wei Lian finally completed his song. For the past few days, he has been working hard at perfecting the melody and lyrics of the song. He wanted this to be the best song he had ever written. Because this song is written for her. He had also signed up for the song writing competition, despite earlier resistance. Somehow, he felt a drive in him that he had never felt before. What was it? He is unable to comprehend.

Three days after he had submitted his application form, Wei Lian was called up for an interview. While doing a casual performance of the song he wrote during the interview, the judges agree unanimously that the song he had written is touching and heartfelt, and his voice that delivered it is filled with the right dose of sorrow that the song should depict.

As the judges continued to rain praises on him, Wei Lian stood up from his seat abruptly. It was as if he was suddenly awakened from a dream. He told the stunned judges firmly that he has decided not to use this song for the competition and that he is pulling out of the competition. Then he left without saying another word.

Cherie was all Wei Lian could think of now. He had received a call from Cherie earlier and she told him she is leaving Singapore for a while to rest her mind and relax. Somehow, in his heart, he doesn’t want the song to be used for the competition anymore. He wanted to present that song only to her.

He frantically hailed a cab to the airport, lugging his guitar along. Upon arrival, he quickly whipped out his handphone to call Cherie but was unable to reach her as she had turned off her handphone. He quickly made his way towards the Information Counter and explained to the customer service officer that he was looking for a friend urgently. The customer service officer listened intently and was visibly moved with what Wei Lian was telling her. She tilted the microphone towards Wei Lian. Wei Lian strummed the guitar and started singing the song. Cherie’s song.

Cherie stopped short in her tracks. Isn’t that Wei Lian’s voice singing over the airport PA system? What in the world is happening? She looked around her and spotted him at the Information Counter. She hurried over.

“Kelvin Tan! What are you doing here??” Cherie poked him on the arm. Wei Lian stopped singing and turned to Cherie all at once, at a loss for words. Singing he can do well, but expressing his feelings? This is going to be his first. But he knew he had to do it.

“Cherie, I…..I….I really don’t know how to say this. You know me lah, I don’t know how to say nice things. But I just want you to know that the song I just sang is for you. “ Wei Lian paused, his face was hot with furious blushing. There was no response from Cherie. She must be too shocked to hear all these. He mustered all his courage and said， “You are very important to me. Can you not leave?”

There was a long deafening silence between them. In the background the hustle and bustle of the airport activities droned on.

Finally Cherie spoke. “Wei Lian…..I don’t know what to say but I’m sorry. Jason is and will be the only one I love and I’ve already decided to leave this place for awhile to try to get over him.” She reached out to give Wei Lian’s hand a squeeze and left.

He stood in the middle of the airport, shoulders slumped. The pain was excruciating. But he had somehow expected this ending. He told himself not to cry, but the tears he was trying so very hard to hold back, trickled rebelliously down his cheeks.

Chapter 2

2006-02-14T19:00:00.000-08:00

you xie shi, ruo bu shuo, hui bu hui cheng wei yong yuan de yi han?
dan shuo le, you hui bu hui cheng wei yong yuan de shang tong?

Chapter 2

A hearty round of applause broke out and the soft sound of notes together with the tong tong tong sound of coins dropping into the round tin filled the air as Wei Lian finished up his last song for the day. He did not have the mood to continue singing today.

The whole afternoon, he has been wondering how Cherie has been progressing with Jason. Did she have a great lunch with him? How did he treat her?…. Too many “did she” and “did he”. Yes, all the questions just stem from his love for Cherie. But the one that Cherie loves is Jason, not him. He has been trying to hold back his feelings for her. He wanted to drop a hint to Jason but Cherie refused to let him do anything. He could only keep mum about both their feelings.

“Encore! Encore!” Suddenly a loud voice amidst the large audience shouted. It is a young female voice. It sounded muffled.

Encore? Who is that person shouting encore? Usually he would oblige. But, he still had to attend another lesson in school and…he is not in a good mood to continue singing now. He shrugged it off without answering and turns around to have a mouthful of water from his large water bottle.

Suddenly, the girl spoke again. “Can you sing “Ai Shi Ni Yan Li De Yi Shou Qing Ge?” Again, the voice sounds muffled. She sounds as if she had just cried.

“Can you?” The girl asked again.

Wei Lian kept mum. Anything but that song. “Sorry, not that song.” He continued packing and turned away from the girl. He felt his guitar case and packed in his guitar.

Seeing him behaving so aloof, the girl raised her voice. “Why are you acting so aloof? Don’t you know it’s rude not to look at people when someone is talking to you? Unless you tell me you are blind.”

Wei Lian slung all his bags and loads his equipment with the help of a café staff who came to help him bring them back to the café. Irritating. “Yes. I can’t see.” He admits readily and feels for his white walking cane in his bag, leaving the girl who challenged him stunned. He unfolds his cane and begins to tap his way out of the dispersing crowd.

Stunned by his blunt yet honest reply, the girl was silent for a moment. But subconsciously, she reached forward and grabbed onto Wei Lian’s bag. “I’m sorry, but can you please sing that song for me? Please?” she pleaded. Wei Lian resisted and kept walking but the girl held on tightly to his bag, restricting his movement.

“I ya. Ok la, I give up. I’ll just sing half the song without the guitar ok? I got to rush for class la.” Wei Lian heaves a sigh, clears his throat and starts singing “Ai shi ni yan li de yi shou qing ge…” The girl closes her eyes to enjoy the song. Memories started flooding back and tears rolled quietly down her cheeks.

He stops abruptly after the first chorus. “Ok, I got to go liao la. Bye.” Before the girl could thank him, Wei Lian’s handphone rang. He answers the phone and walks on, leaving the girl behind in his tracks.

“Hello, it’s me ah.” His heart did a turn. How come Cherie sounds so dejected? “Are you free? Can meet me at the beach house now?” The beach house is located at an isolated part of Changi beach and was discovered by them one day when they were there for a BBQ. It is quite a rundown house but nobody bothered to take it down or refurbish it. They ended up using it as their refuge whenever they felt down. Somehow, being there had a calming effect on them.

“Ok lo. Give me half an hour hor?” He wanted so much to ask Cherie if she is ok, but he just couldn’t bring himself to say it. He never knew how to express his concern. He found it too troublesome. Or was it just too embarrassing? Or maybe both. He’d rather show his concern through actions than spoken words. And though he is often mistaken as a player, he is certainly not one. Those who are close to him will know that is the way he can communicate.

In less than half an hour, the taxi pulled up at Changi Beach. Wei Lian walked hurriedly towards the direction of the beach house. His heart had a nagging feeling that Cherie was upset about something.

“Hello hello, I’m here”, he announced as he pushed open the creaky wooden door. He could hear small sobs coming from Cherie. He moved towards her and asked in his gentlest tone “I yo, what happened?” His heart quietly ached.

In between sobs, Cherie told Wei Lian what she discovered during lunch. Jason had confessed happily to her after the bill arrived, that the girl whom Cherie had helped him woo is now officially his girlfriend. “I know I should feel happy for him, but I just can’t help feeling sad!”, Cherie wept and put her head on Wei Lian’s shoulder. Not knowing what to do, he put his hand on her head to comfort her. “Hai. Who asked you to help him chase the girl lay?”

“But I..I just can’t help it. How am I supposed to tell him I love him and beg him not to be with other girls? I couldn’t bring myself to tell him.. Wei, Wei Lian..he loves Jessica..I am, I am just a….” Her voice trailed off and her sobs turned into uncontrollable ones. She shifted and buried her whole head into his chest.

Wei Lian knows what she is thinking. Jason will soon break off with the girl because he is a player. Hai! He knows that every relationship of Jason’s, after Jessica, will not last long. But he is not Jason. He cannot guarantee that Jason will not last long with this current girlfriend.

“I yo, don’t cry lay? Wei Lian smoothed her hair gently and muttered softly. He is once again at a loss for words. He knew what he should do to comfort a girl but he just finds it awkward to whisper soft words.

“I’m such a loser, I am such a coward…I don’t even dare to reveal my own feelings…” Cherie’s cries became muffled but Wei Lian could feel the punches that rained on his chest. Those punches contain hints of exasperation that came as a result of her helplessness.

Wei Lian’s arms tightened to hug her closer. He does not want to say anything to comfort her. For, he knows too well that he is also doing the same thing as her. He longed to hug her tightly; to tell her he loves her and not to worry, but he knew he could never do it.

For a moment, Wei Lian thought to himself, “I am doing the same thing, isn’t it? We are just two people who loves someone deeply but do not have the courage to say it out, for fear of being rejected and because we want the person we love to be happy with the person they love. I am not the one she wants. But I just want her to be happy.” With this realization, he smiled and does away with his thoughts. He just needed some time to get over it.

“Ok la. Pain liao la, my chest. So rude one ah you? Keep punching people. How can?! “ Wei Lian tried to ease her crying and save himself from her painful punches. He could do nothing else more.

“Huh?” Cherie looked up at his serious face. She wanted to laugh. God knows that when Wei Lian shows his serious face, he looks like a small child who can’t get a sweet from his teacher upon getting full marks for dictation. Too bad it isn’t Wei Lian whom she loves. She thought. If not, he would make a good partner…

Ha..haha..The deserted and unfurnished beach house was suddenly filled with soft, muffled chuckles. Wei Lian let go of her and tried to stand up. “Laugh what? What is so funny lay?” He felt some dirt on his pants at the knees and brushed it off.

After a few minutes, the laughter is embedded in Wei Lian’s mind. He leaned against the pillar and crossed his arms. He wondered aloud, “Eh, who is the one who cried so hard and made me kneel on the floor with her for half an hour ah? Look at who is laughing now lor? You want to cry or you want to laugh? Make up your mind lay.” He pretended to be serious and flips open the cover of his Braille watch to feel the time.

“Kelvin Tan! You are an idiot! You don’t know how to treat a girl nicely! You always want to treat me like a guy!” Cherie complained, picking up a dirty cushion from the sofa and throwing it in his direction with all her might.

Wei Lian heard the cushion coming in his direction and quickly fended it off. “Eh dirty la this cushion, we haven’t clean up that sofa, don’t anyhow throw can or not?”

“Idiot! Women bully! And that is you! Hmmph!” Another dirty cushion came in his direction. This time, Wei Lian did not successfully fend it off and it hit against his chest. “I ya so dirty, please la you. You can call me anything you want lor, who ask you not to behave like a girl lay? Oei, still anyhow throw ha? Stop la, I yo! Like that call girl meh?” He threw the dusty cushion aside with his free hand and said sarcastically in a silly tone. “I yo, can throw these cushions away a not? The dust is resting on my face already hor. How long has it been since you last cleaned this house ah?” He complained continuously.

“VAINPOT la you!” Cherie rolled her swollen eyes at the guy who has the habit of mumbling his complaints in machine-gun speed. This guy needs to have someone to deflate his ego when it gets too bloated lor! “Like that your future girlfriend can stand you meh?” She mumbled softly casually.

“Eh, I heard you okay. She cannot stand, she can sit what, no chair meh? “ Wei Lian quipped as his finger tips brushed against the freshly repainted wall, playing with the fan switch his fingers rested upon.

Chapter 1

2006-01-19T20:34:00.000-08:00

“Xing fu shi kan de tou er bu shi she bu de ta de suo you....xing fu shi yin wei wo ai ni er bu shi ni ai bu ai wo….I love you. Ni dong bu dong?”

Chapter 1

"Deng..deng. Deng, deng, deng!" On and off, piano keynotes were heard drifting in the air. A guy of medium build sat down on the piano seat, his fingers touching the piano keys. He suddenly stopped.

As if searching for something, he lifted his fingers from the piano keys and started to feel for the laptop that he had placed on top of the piano. He pressed a tab and a fast and gruff computerized voice filled the room. He listened intently as the computerized voice reads out the document displayed on the laptop screen.

Cherie’s footsteps quickened. She hurried breathlessly across the hallway. "Oh my god, I must tell Wei Lian about this! Such a great opportunity…..Wei Lian!" Cherie pushed open the door to the piano practice room.

The door to the piano practice room sprung open so suddenly that it gave the guy who was still on the piano seat quite a startle. "Huh? What happened?" He asked in his usual indifferent manner as he turned towards the direction of the voice that called him. Hearing no reply, he waited patiently for the person to catch her breath before continuing.

Cherie bent down to catch her breath for a moment before waving the piece of paper in her hands excitedly. "Wei Lian! I just picked up an application form for the 20th Song Writing competition! Original lyrics and tune which is chosen as the best song of the whole competition will receive not only a cash prize of S$15,000 but also a Masters of Arts Scholarship in Music in an American university and…and best of all, a brand new Mazda 3 car!" Cherie excitedly read out the details of the crumpled paper she has been clutching in her hands.

Listening to his best friend, Cherie, reading out the competition details, Wei Lian only smiled. He kept quiet. Yes, he knew about the competition. It is an annual competition which chooses the best songwriter to go overseas for a sponsored Masters course in music. He loves music. Three years --- he had joined the competition thrice; and each time he had the best song, yet the sponsors dropped him. He smirked quietly inside him. He knows what these people are thinking. He knows better than anyone else that he is blind. So what if he got what it takes? So what if he wrote a good song?

"Wei Lian…you.. are you going to try again?" Cherie asked with a concerned look. She bit her lips, trying to say something. She forgot how the judges for the previous competitions had dropped Wei Lian even though he was the clear winner.

"Come on, stop smiling. Don’t give that kind of smile!" Cherie pouted her lips, complaining. Nah, she wasn’t really complaining or displeased. She just doesn’t like to see his indifferent expression.

"Then how am I supposed to smile lay?" The indifferent look on his face remained even when he is talking.

Cherie couldn’t resist but to reach out for his face and pulled both his cheeks sideways angrily. Wei Lian crossed his arms and allowed her to "abuse" his face."Kelvin Tan, you dare to be cheeky with me right? I shall pull; I shall pull until your skin loses its elasticity….."

"I don’t care, Kelvin Tan, you must join this competition. If I don’t see your name in the competition list, you’ll get it from me!" Cherie demanded.

"Huh? I can’t even drive lor. Join for what lay?" Wei Lian brushes aside her playful fingers and turned back to face the piano. His hand quickly reaches for the laptop and with a swift movement, he slammed the laptop screen down. He does not want her to know that he has been trying to pen a new song for the competition. He is confused. He is still unsure if he should give it another go.

Cherie thrust the application form into his hands. "Hehe…but I can!" She laughed playfully.

"Oh…you want the car prize lah…" Wei Lian nodded his head knowingly.

Knock knock! A sudden turn on the door-knob disrupted the light-hearted atmosphere between the two buddies. Wei Lian opened his laptop case, packed his laptop into the case quietly and closed the piano flap.

"Hey guys, gee..glad I found you people here! Whatcha doing?" It was Jason. Their best friend. And…the guy whom Cherie secretly loves.

"Eh hello hello. So free today ah?" Wei Lian stood up, slung both his bag and laptop bag across his chest and unfolds his white walking cane.

Cherie’s eyes sparkled as her eyes laid upon Jason. "Hi Jas!" Jason returned her a smile and turned to look at Wei Lian who briskly tapped his way out with his white walking cane. "Yalor. No lessons later mah. I come and you are leaving? How can, buddy? Was thinking of asking you guys to go for lunch." Jason gave Wei Lian’s arm a slight punch as he walked out.

"I ya, no need la. I ate already. Late for busking already. Later got class." And with that, Wei Lian continued walking.

"Oh ok lor." Jason and Cherie peered out from behind the door and watched him disappear round the bend.

"So are we going for lunch or what?" Jason turned back to Cherie. "He is going for busking, don’t tell me you are going to the library?"

"Of course." Cherie shrugged her shoulders and walked out of the piano practice room.

Huh? She meant lunch or library? Jason caught up with the fast-paced Cherie. "Eh Cherie, you going lunch or library?"

"I yo, lunch la. Lunchtime go library for what? I’m hungry. Faster la." Cherie pretends to roll her eyes.

Half an hour later…

Wei Lian swiftly sets up his equipment and a high foldable stool along the busy streets of the Bugis area. This is his favorite busking area. Sometimes he sings at night for the seafood and western food café behind his busking area. The owner of Jose Place Café is a nice old lady. He calls her Granny Gin. She had told him he resembles her grandson who passed away at an early age. If he had not died, he would have been around his age.

She had allowed him to keep his busking equipment in the café’s locker-room and busk at other times of the day near her café. On occasional nights, she even hires him to sing at the café. Wei Lian loves this petite, warm and loving grandma dearly.

Effortlessly, he quietly unpacked his precious guitar out of its case and settles himself down on his seat. He test-strummed the guitar and began his usual day of busking.

Café Mocha Love.

Both Jason and Cherie sat in the booth in this stylish yet cosy café. All of a sudden, there was an awkward moment of long silence. Cherie avoided Jason’s stare. She wished Wei Lian had joined them for lunch. He has not been joining them for lunch recently.

"Why are you looking so weird?" He asked.

Weird? "How weird?" Cherie pretended to look unconcerned. "Just tired I guess. You think too much la."

Jason laughed. "Is it? For a moment, I thought it might be because of Wei Lian that you are quiet leh. How come he loves to start busking in the afternoon recently? He on diet ah? No leh. His figure quite good leh. No need diet mah. Eh? I thought he got a class later?"Cherie saw him mumbling to himself to find out the reason why Wei Lian doesn’t join them for lunch recently.

She wanted to laugh but she decided to control her urge to laugh. Hai! Slow roach. When will he finally realize that she loves him? She looked down to examine her fingers quietly as Jason continued his guessing.

Jason is still mumbling and thinking. Finally, he gave up and looked up at Cherie, "Eh, is it he needs money recently?"

Of course not. You slow roach. She looked up and shook her head. "No la. He is not cash strapped. How can he be cash strapped? The café he busks at pays him good money. Don’t worry. He found a part-time job as a songwriter recently. They pay him well too." That is Cherie. Her usual way of talking when she is tired.

Anyone can tell that Wei Lian has been excusing himself so that the both of them can share some quiet moments together. Hmm. Well, not everyone though. But at least she can tell that he is obviously excusing himself. After all, Wei Lian is the only one who knows her secret.

She loves Jason. Since young, Jason has always been the one who stood up for her when she is bullied or gets into trouble. Wei Lian, on the other hand, is the one who always listens and keeps her secrets for her. She loves both of them dearly. But she knows that she treats Wei Lian only as a brother.

As for Jason…she knows those feelings are different from brotherly love. A pity, Jason is more of a player. He’d rather move on than settle down. The three of them know perfectly well why Jason refuses to settle down.

It is because of his ex-girlfriend. He couldn’t forget how Jessica had died in the car accident. Jessica had loved him a lot before she passed away. And now, it’s her turn to fall in love with him.

Deep down inside, she knows that she loved him way before Jessica became a couple with Jason. She detested that feeling of seeing them together and acting so loving towards each other. It was like stabbing her heart with a knife. But she controlled her feelings and made Wei Lian keep it a secret, as she knew that she would die any moment.

But when Jessica died, her heart had been transplanted to Cherie’s body. Yes. She lives on only because Jessica died. And her heart was compatible for her body. She had a big hole in her heart and could die anytime. The previous transplant had almost cost her her life. The most ironic thing of all, Jessica was her best friend at college. She is confused.

She had thought that it is because of Jessica’s heart that her feelings for Jason deepened. Is that the reason, or is it not? "Whichever reason it is, it is a fact that you love him. Isn’t it? It is that simple." Wei Lian’s words rang in her mind. "Whichever reason it is, it is a fact that you love him. Isn’t it? It is that simple…Whichever reason it is, it is a fact that you love him. Isn’t it? It is that simple…."

"Hey Cherie. Cherie!" Jason snapped his fingers and tried to bring back the attention of Cherie.

"Huh?" Cherie realized that she has been staring into space. "Shall we get the bill?" Jason asked. Cherie nodded, her mind was still wandering….